Toddler Times
Multitasking Parents And Stress
A story on NPR revealed a study on working moms and their multitasking skills, relating to stress.
“Working mothers spend significantly more time multitasking at home than working dads. And those mothers aren’t happy about it.”
The hours from 4-7 or 5-8, commonly known to me as “the witching hours” because the kids are extraordinarily cranky during this time, are probably more accurately titled “The Arsenic Hours” by women in this study.
No joke. I would have to agree, that even as a part-time worker, I dread that three-hour block that includes dinner, bath and bedtime, cleaning the kitchen, folding the laundry and putting away toys (or trying to get my two toddlers to put away toys). It is easily the most stressful time of day for me and I find myself doing way more running around than when I’m actually running for exercise. Personally, I’m not the greatest multitasker, but I do what I have to do. Dealing with the daily tasks of the household are never-ending and when my kids finally settle in to bed, and I can “relax,” that’s when I have to start working (again).
Interestingly, the fathers in this study who arrived home during this “aresenic” time, did not have nearly as much stress, nor do they do the same type of multi-tasking. “…so they might be answering a work call while spending time with the kids.”
In my eyes, this isn’t really multitasking. This is just working and not watching the kids, but maybe that’s me. Also, it may depend on how old the kids are, and they might not need much ‘watching.’
However, in my experience, (in my house, and many of the households I know) the balance of parental duties is certainly not even, especially in the early days. My husband does a lot, and now even more that there aren’t any infants around. But even still, I still find that if I’m not the one to initiate, dinner just might not happen. Or at least it might not happen until 8pm, and it might look like pizza every night.
What do you think of this study and how working moms multi-task? Single moms? What’s your take? Also, any Dads (stay-at-home or working) want to comment on their stress level during this time of day? Would like to hear from single sex parents as well on who is more stressed in your relationship and why?
Photo Credit: Candie N
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3 Comments
maggie commented on Dec 05 11 at 9:45 amMultitasking is my middle name. Especially since I work from home. I multitask all day- work calls while making lunch for M, sending emails while at the park. I start back to work today and I’m nervous about juggling it all. Oh, and my husband. When he’s home he’s focused on one thing at a time (and it’s usually not helping around the house).
Christine commented on Dec 05 11 at 10:54 amOur family is an exception to this study.
My husband is the cooker and cleaner. But when it comes to the kids, that’s all me. He’s great at spending time with them and will do stuff when necessary, but it seems like if we’re both doing something and one of them needs someone, I’m the one to the rescue. I can’t sit and watch MY football game on a Sunday afternoon without having to make a sandwich for my toddler, change a baby diaper, clean up toys, etc. But he’ll sit through my game and his game and not get up to help out the girls.
Danielle commented on Dec 05 11 at 3:53 pmMy husband is a work from home dad, and usually has had the kids alone anywhere from 1-3 hours by the time I get home from work. Sometimes, dinner isn’t ready, sometimes it is. He does all the dishes and usually gets the wash done. I do most of the laundry folding, and almost all of the bathing. We still use the divide and conquer strategy, so that when I’m home I’m usually taking care of Abby, and he usually covers Maddy and her needs. He does most of the story reading to Maddy at night as well, though I am the one who helps her with anything academic. I feel tremendously lucky to have a workhorse husband who pitches in so much…on the other hand, he does tend to disappear to try to get work done once I walk in the house, which doesn’t always make for a smooth evening. On the other hand, I can usually clock out once Abby goes to bed, and actually get 1-2 hours of “me” time.
We do have a cleaning lady who comes every two weeks, and the kitchen is always clean, but our house tends to be cluttered otherwise. It’s what I’ve sacrificed for my sanity…I refuse to spend all my free time in the evenings straightening up the house. I try to do as much of that as I can before the kids go to bed, and after that it’s quiet time for all. The downside…is my messy house, but at least it’s clean twice a month. :)
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