The one knows what the other is thinking. When not, they can always talk it out.

You know that thing where twins claim they have their own language? I’m totally buying it after watching a set of twins just go on and on about, oh, you know, a missing sock, an unbelievably big stack of … OK, I missed that. There’s a fascinating big stack of something. And something else I can’t quite make out but it’s clearly off limits — hence the stop sign hand-waving and repetitious “no, no, no.”

Which, P.S., is an awesome joke that never gets old. Continue reading »

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Watchable Seuss: he wrote the screenplay and lyrics

Typically, you’d want to avoid eggs that are green and also most meats that carry the color. But today, they’re OK to eat. In fact, a second plate would be fine as well.

Today is Dr. Seuss’ birthday and it’s definitely worth celebrating. Dr. Seuss, or, more specifically, the man behind the rhymes, Theodor Geisel, would have been 107 this year.

But if you can’t stomach the eggs and you’d rather keep Cindy Lu Who with your Christmas stuff — or if just want some new way of honoring the great children’s author, try getting your hands on a copy of the film “5000 Fingers of Dr. T.” Geisel wrote the screenplay and the lyrics. Continue reading »

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Brownies make everything better. Even divorce.

Life after divorce is messy, especially if you’re a woman, according to experts.  ABC News ran a feature on Friday profiling several divorced women trying to “navigate new lives with fewer financial resources, more child-care responsibilities and the challenge of dating again.”

And then there’s the drinking.  I don’t know about you, Christina Aguilera… but I have certainly spent a few nights consoling myself with grape juice since my divorce.  It’s rumored that Aguilera’s handlers want her to face the fact that she may be drinking too much, and some believe her booze-soaked brain led her to flub the lyrics of the national anthem during the Super Bowl.  (Lucky for me, I’ve always been a lightweight – two glasses of anything and I cut myself off while still pleasantly tipsy.)

But life after divorce has its upsides, too.  Like when your mother, in an effort to cheer you up, discovers a box of brownies from 10 years ago. Continue reading »

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What are you looking at?

If you are a woman who has ever been outdoors, chances are good that you’ve been a victim of street harassment.  You know, the rude catcalls and suggestive comments that some men direct toward women whose only crime is being female in public?  These guys may think it’s funny and harmless, but it’s not.  Being objectified in this way is degrading and embarrassing and most of us find it very offensive.

You know who else doesn’t like it?  This boy right here.  He goes by the name Astronomical Kid and appears to be about 10-years-old.  Sick of the unwanted attention his mother receives from strangers on the street, he’s fighting back with a rap song called “Stop Looking at My Mom. ” Check it out after the jump.  It’s brilliant! Continue reading »

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This Funny Video Friday comes to you courtesy of my friend Eliot Glazer over at Urlesque.  Any lady who’s spent any time looking for love these days knows that boys can be such babies when it comes to romance.  Watch as this hipster kid tells his much-older girlfriend, “I like you but I don’t but I do.”  p.s. – This may be the only time you ever hear a 4-year-old reference Vice founder Gavin McInnes.  Continue reading »

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You know, I’ve been here for a few months now, so it’s about time I tell you: I’m in love with a married man. I know, I know, it’s wrong, but I just can’t help myself. He’s smart, handsome, funny – oh God is he funny! His name is Stephen Colbert. And last night on his show, I’m pretty sure he was sending me and all the ladies here at Strollerderby a subliminal message. He loves us, too!

He responded to Madeline and Bethany’s coverage of the 25-year study that proved lesbian parents raise the happiest children by saying, “Yes, lesbians raise well-adjusted teens who don’t misbehave… and that proves it’s unnatural.”

But he really got heated about the story KJ covered Monday, Hanna Rosin’s thesis for The Atlantic on The End of Men.

Colbert quoted Rosin as saying, “Women dominate today’s colleges and professional schools—for every two men who will receive a B.A. this year, three women will do the same,” and then countered by adding, “That means women will be more qualified for all the best jobs… that don’t exist.”

He noted that during sex selection at fertility clinics, requests for a girl “run at about 75 percent.”  Personally affronted, he cried, “Hey ladies, you want a girl that bad? Go to China. Every checkout counter has a take-a-daughter, leave-a-daughter tray.”  Yikes!

And then Colbert tried to burn his boxers in an effort to emulate the bra-burning feminism of the 70′s, but he couldn’t.  (Okay, wasn’t allowed to.  Semantics!)  He had to nuke them instead.  Which proves Hanna Rosin’s point, men just aren’t as capable as women.

Click through for the clip.  Continue reading »

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We’ve all seen the television commercials. A gorgeous model struts down the sidewalk in slow motion, showing off the latest fashion. Heads turn, until finally the model stops in front of a mirror and coos in a generic European accent, “I poo in blue.”

Okay, maybe you haven’t seen that commercial, in which the model, a two-year-old boy, is shilling the new denim diaper by Huggies. The 30-second spot ends with the visual tagline, “The coolest you’ll look pooping your pants.” Or, it does on some networks, anyway. The New York Times reports that ABC, ABC Family and Sprout “objected to screen text at the end of the spot that included the word ‘pooping,’ (so) for those networks, the text was changed to, ‘When you gotta go, go in style.’”

It seems odd to me that those networks, which air programming geared specifically toward families with children in diapers, would get uppity about a reference to poop. What’s even more bothersome, though, is that according to Newsweek, ABC flat-out refused to air a commercial for Lane Bryant featuring a plus-sized model showing “too much cleavage.” With so many female-centric shows like Grey’s Anatomy, Cougar Town and The View, do they just not understand that plus-sized moms are their demographic?  Or maybe they just can’t comprehend the idea that a woman might be proud of her body, whatever its size, and willing to laugh at the bodily functions of her child.  My guess is networks are afraid that if we’re okay with ourselves and our bodily functions, we might stop buying the stuff that hides all of that raw humanity.  Continue reading »

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