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Ashlynn Conner
To say that I’m shocked and stunned at this news is an understatement.
Ashlynn Conner, a 10-year-old fifth grader from Georgetown, Illinois, committed suicide on Friday after “being taunted by schoolmates who called her fat, ugly and worse.”
Classmates called Ashlynn a slut. At age 10. Incomprehensible. Continue reading »
Is it possible for a parent to pinpoint the moment in which a child's innocence is lost?
Shortly before our younger daughter was born at the end of August, I turned to my husband and asked, “Is there anything we should do differently this time around?”
Our older daughter had just turned 3 and while she’s far from perfect, if our biggest complaint is that she’s prone to tantrums when she doesn’t get in a solid nap, I’d consider us exponentially blessed.
He agreed. “We’re good.”
We really are. Of course things change, and lots of kids who seem sweet and good when they’re little don’t always grow up to be so sweet and good. I was sadly reminded of that this week when I read Dara Pettinelli’s moving essay on The Huffington Post, “The One We Left Behind.”
When I first found out I was pregnant, my initial emotion was boundless joy. And then awe at the miracle of it all: there was a BABY….a real, live human being growing in my belly. Now THAT is a miracle. And an enormous responsibility.
I thought to myself:
This is ok. I can do it.
I am responsible for this baby’s health: I will eat well for the two of us and take care of myself.
I will love and teach, nurture and and guide…. I will BE the example.
But it wasn’t long before the fear set in. During my pregnancy.
And my mother in law said to me: “Just so you know…. from here on out, you will worry.”
And now that they are older? Good heavens!
There is so much I might not be able to control. So many challenges I might face, that so many parents before me have faced: Bullying and Underage drinking. Cyber-stalking and predators. Teen pregnancy and mean girls. Eating disorders, Depression and suicide.
And now that I have actually had my children…. and they are growing…. I am seeing some of these scary-I-swear-they-can’t-ever-happen-to-my-family situations happen- Like yesterday’s apparent attempted teen suicide at Cathedral High School in Indianapolis….
News reports indicate a 17-year-old boy shot himself in the stomach, while on campus (though outside) and then called the school to report he had been hurt. From everything I read, not only is the boy stable, but the school handled it remarkably well and even made counselors available to the kids right away.
But while the boy’s survival is certainly good news – as is the school’s ability to handle an emergency situation, as a parent, I instantly put myself in the shoes of a parent of a teenager and think, “How will I know if you need help?” And I want to scream it from the mountaintops: HOW WILL I KNOW?
Bipolar Disorder in Kids: Warning signs of manic depression
Phoebe Prince’s suicide has had more than its share of media attention. The 15-year-old hanged herself after being bullied aggressively by classmates. Six teenagers were charged with crimes ranging from statutory rape to civil rights violations.
In the nearly 18 months since her death, there’s been near endless coverage of the case. There seems to be widespread agreement that the teens involved were made an example of by the DA. What’s less clear is whether or not that’s a good thing.
There’ve been a number of high-profile bullying related suicides this year. The It Gets Better project was started in response to a rash of suicides by gay teens who had been bullied. It can easily be argued that an example needed to be made of someone. Was justice served with respect to Phoebe Prince and the teens who bullied her, though?
Her mother has recently given her first press interview. So has one of the teens who was charged in her death. Both express deep unhappiness about the way the case was handled.
The anti-terrorist campaign in NYC could extend to school bullying
If you see something, say something.
That phrase is printed widely throughout New York City, asking citizens to report any suspicious activity to authorities to prevent a terrorist attack.
The same phrase might have saved Phoebe Prince’s life. She hung herself 16 months ago using a scarf given to her by her little sister for Christmas after she was bullied by her classmates to the point she couldn’t bear to live anymore. Somebody had to have known what other kids were doing to her. Who knows if making mention of how she was treated to a teacher or parent could have meant she’d still be here today.
More than a year after her death, the bullies who drove Phoebe Prince to hang herself are being pleading guilty to their crimes. Two of the six defendents were sentenced today. Other plea deals are expected. Phoebe’s mother appeared in court today to approve the deals.
The plea deals required the teens to admit that their bullying and ethnic slurs were criminal acts, and to serve a year of probation.
They were charged with civil rights offenses due to the ethnic nature of the bullying, as well as criminal harrassment. A statutory rape charge against one student was dropped. Another young man will be tried for statutory rape in July.
These convictions are a huge win for the DA who decided to prosecute the teens, and they send a clear message to bullies: you will be held accountable.
Student death prompts suicide awareness
Seventeen years ago today Nirvana lead singer Kurt Cobain was found dead in his Seattle home after committing suicide. His death rocked young people across the country and sparked a rash of copycat suicides.
According to the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, suicides among young people continue to be a serious problem. Each year in the U.S., thousands of teenagers commit suicide. Suicide is the third leading cause of death for 15-to-24-year-olds, and the sixth leading cause of death for 5-to-14-year-olds. Continue reading »
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