Levi Johnston Promotes Contraception with Salty Nuts

When you can take a shot at abstinence-only education, the former Governor of Alaska and vice-presidential runner-up and shill shelled nuts all in one blow, you must be some kind of genius. Or Levi Johnston.

Continue reading »

Bellybutton Sex – Kids’ Misconceptions about Sex

Before you got the whole “Birds and Bees” talk at the age of 24, how did you think sex worked? Did you think mommy made babies with daddy by getting on his shoulders? Was sex when mom and dad rubbed their butts together under a tarp? Like any kid, you probably had some imaginative misconception on how the whole biological dance works. Lemondrop compiled a list of some the better examples. Some highlights:

Misconception: “My parents gave me the ‘Where Did I Come From?’ book when I was really young. So from the illustrations I thought babies were made by two hippies.” — Maggie, 28

Continue reading »

5 Reasons the Duggars are Sex Machines (?)

Okay, so there’s a headline that might get your attention. Momlogic put up this article in which they really want to convince you that Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar are FREAKS (you know, in the realm of sex). It would seem the several hundred children the Duggars produced at least imply they have a passing interest in sex. And you could end it right there. But Momlogic throws down 5 whole reasons we should think about how much the Duggars like doin’ it. Like a lot. All the time. Unabashedly. And with their kids’ knowledge.

Huh?

So here are those reasons, as promised and now delivered.

Momlogic’s Top 5 Duggar Sex “Facts”

1) Michelle Duggar can get her groove on.

When you’ve got 18 people calling you Mom, focusing on sex can be a challenge. To get in the mood, does Michelle Duggar work herself into a catatonic state? Is that catatonic state called “sleep”?

2) The Duggars love pregnant sex.

Continue reading »

U.N. Wants to Teach 5-Year-Olds About Masturbation

Pull out the toys and get your lotion ready! The United Nations has a new report out suggesting kids as young as five need to be taught about masturbation.

Officially it’s UNESCO, the United Nations Economic, Social and Cultural Organization which issued the report meant to encourage sex education for kids. Not suprisingly, social conservatives are up in arms.  Continue reading »

Russian Mothers Auction Off Daughters’ Virginity

And you thought your mom was bad. A set of mothers have reportedly been detained by Moscow police for attempting to sell off their daughters’ virginity on the Internet.

The girls were only thirteen and sixteen, and the auction was doing brisk business before it was shut down.  Continue reading »

School Kids Learn Their Rights to an Orgasm a Day

There are certain unalienable rights every kid should know about. And if your kid is going to school in a certain sector of England, they’re learning about their right to a daily orgasm.

We should be so lucky. Continue reading »

Dad Harassed for Daughters in Men’s Room

Who hasn’t been in this situation? Your child has to go to the bathroom, and the only one to take them is the opposite-gender parent. So which bathroom do you use?

If you’re Donovan O’Neil, you take your toddler daughters into the men’s room. After all, he’s a man. So why was he attacked by a security guard? Continue reading »

Fifth Graders Get Sex Tape Instead of Slideshow

A lesson to all teachers who make sex tapes: make sure you don’t accidentally grab said tape when you go to make your end-of-year slideshow for your class.

A fifth grade teacher in California never meant to expose her kids to her extra-curricular activities when recorded over her own sex tape. But she accidentally sent it home with her students. Continue reading »

Hey Queers, Come Hold Hands By My Kid

There’s been a lively debate going on over at my post about a judge who ruled that a man’s children couldn’t be “exposed” to his gay friends. And one of the biggies is the assertion by several Babble readers that they wouldn’t allow someone (gay or straight) to hold hands in front of their kids.

So I’m wondering, Babble readers, where do you draw the line?
Continue reading »