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Strollerderby
The notion that Facebook and Twitter provide ideal, Webby ways to stalk our kids isn’t exactly a new joke. But the good people at The Onion manage to milk some fresh humor out of it in the video below, which plays almost verbatim like a cheesy segment on the “Today” show.
Well, verbatim, except for all the cursing and the fact that the show’s resident “e-mom” refers to her son’s girlfriend as “trampy” and “a slut.”
In honor of October — the year’s most ghoulish, Halloweeny time — every Rich or Rehab this month will focus on kids who starred in scary movies.
Our first horror star: Danny Lloyd, the young boy who mumbled some stuff about “redrum” and darted through a maze to escape from a psychotic Jack Nicholson in “The Shining.” What happened to him after his uneventful and delightful stay at Stanley Kubrick’s version of the Overlook Hotel?
In last week’s Rich or Rehab, I wrote about five of the musically gifted kids who starred in “School of Rock.” This week I attempt — and not always successfully — to track down a few more.
Without further delay, let’s get rockin’.
In 2003, a group of prep school kids joined Jack Black and, through the power of rock ‘n’ roll, urged a nation of moviegoers to stick it to The Man.
Since then, the preteens who starred in “School of Rock” have grown up and now find themselves in different places in their lives, although several of them still seem pretty committed to making music. In part one of a two-part Rich or Rehab — think of it as the Strollerderby equivalent of a cliffhanger — I attempt to track down 10 of the key School of Rockers.
If you watched “Welcome Back, Kotter” when you were a kid, you probably had a favorite Sweathog. Some preferred John Travolta’s Vinnie Barbarino because, let’s face it, he was pretty hot. Others admired the “Hi there” smoothness of one Freddie “Boom Boom” Washington. And still others stood in quiet awe of Juan Epstein and his unsurpassed ability to forge notes from his mother.
Then there was Arnold Horshack, the goofy, guffawing, naive and sweet Sweathog who won the nation’s heart with his constant enthusiasm for answering questions in class. Horshack was played by a young actor named Ron Palillo. Does anyone want to know what he’s up to now? Please, don’t all raise your hands and shout, “Oooh! Oooh!” all at once.
Of all the mean girls in the history of television, the meanest might have been Nellie Oleson from “Little House on the Prairie.”
I mean, look at her picture over there. Just look at it. You want to punch her in the face, don’t you? Or at least convince Laura Ingalls (aka Melissa Gilbert) to swat her senseless with her braided pigtails, right?
Well, here’s the thing about that obnoxious, ringlet-haired, self-righteous, arrogant little Miss Oleson. She was played by a young actress named Alison Arngrim, who, by all accounts, seems to be completely unobnoxious. Which means you can’t, in good conscience, really want to hit her, back then or now.
Speaking of now, you may be wondering what Arngrim has been up to since she stopped regularly terrorizing sweet little girls with nicknames like Half Pint. Allow me to bring you up to speed.
Every parent has been there. You’re stuck in the car for hours with the kids and they insist on listening to nothing but Raffi.
This Babble list of car songs — 25 adult tunes that will definitely appeal to children — is designed to resolve that problem. Some of the songs writer Lindsay Armstrong recommends may already be in your regular rotation (“1 2 3 4″ by Feist, “Three Little Birds” by Bob Marley), but others may sound fresh to both you and the kids (“New Shoes” by Paolo Nutini, maybe?). Also, I can’t stress this enough: God bless Armstrong for including Ted Leo’s cover of “Six Months in a Leaky Boat.”
To keep the music flowing, I’ve got a few more additional recommendations. Think of them as the special hidden tracks on this already solid mix of music.
Lori Garcia 
Joslyn Gray 
Amber Doty 
Julianna Miner 
Monica Bielanko 
Sierra Black 
Meredith Carroll 
Carolyn Castiglia 
Sunny Chanel 
Madeline Holler 
Rebecca Odes 
Danielle Smith 
Danielle Sullivan 
Katherine Stone 
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