babble » blogs » Strollerderby
Strollerderby
Moms are having kids later in life.
A post from Babble Senior Editor Mira Jacobs:
Kicking off Women’s History Month, the White House today released the first really comprehensive report on the status of American women since 1963, detailing how we’re faring in terms of family, employment, education, health, and crime. While none of the information released was out-and-out shocking (and most has been published previously in separate reports), when taken as a whole, Women in America paints the picture of a rapidly changing social and economic landscape.
The most “surprising” thing you already knew? Women are having their first kid later in life. In fact, a whopping 24 percent of women today are having their first child at age 30 or older — that’s six times as many as were doing so in the 1970s. While it would be easy enough to argue that we’re just following men down the rabbit hole of “old new parenthood,” Acting Deputy Secretary at the Department of Commerce Becky Blank pointed to a few other factors. Continue reading »
Does leaving them for her ex to take care of make her a bad mother?
If there’s any one thing about the institution of parenthood that disappoints me most, it’s the antiquated gender roles which seemed to be ingrained within it. Oh, I know. You’ll dispute that. As a society, we’re far from the days of June Cleaver, right? After all, women are fully engaged in professional careers and aren’t the apron-wearing domestic divas they once were.
True. But, we’re nowhere near as far along as we think we are. And I know as much whenever I read or hear about a mom patronizing a dad’s effort in the realm of caregiving. Whether he was too aggressive in rinsing the shampoo out of Junior’s hair or has picked out another atrocious outfit for the baby, poor Dad can’t get it right. Many moms are more focused on the fact that dads aren’t executing the caregiving duties the “right” way than they are on the fact that this generation of fathers actually wants to be a part of the caregiving process in the first place. Whether they realize it or not, such women are ignorantly endorsing the myopic gender roles established by our forefathers — the same ones our society in general and women in specific have fought so hard to change and redefine.
And earlier today, I read a story from the other side — a tale of a woman whom traditional gender roles has labeled as a bad mom when, in her mind, she was anything but.
Match.com says single men want kids more than women.
In a new survey performed by leading dating site Match.com, results show that single men want to have children more than single women. Twenty-four percent of single men without children under the age of 18 want to have children while only fifteen percent of the women surveyed want kids. The study also reveals that 33 percent of both men and women want to get married.
Keep in mind, the survey is not exactly from a scientific journal and although Match.com is saying the study is the most comprehensive American study of its kind, it has been released right in time for pre-Valentine Day’s sign-ups. The results were likely meant to draw more women into keeping hope alive that there is that special someone out there who is looking for nothing more than to settle down and start a family.
Could it be true?
Being good with kids makes a man attractive.
When I was kid, being a stay-at-home dad was basically unheard of in my neighborhood. Now, with added equality between the sexes, a faulty economy and many moms in high level positions, it has become more widespread, if not common. Our society has grown more accepting of pushing past stereotypical gender roles. Yet there are still certain circles where you’ll overhear moms on the playground gossiping about the stay-at-home dads as if they are a new breed of men. There may be some truth to that because these men don’t feel the need to have to slip into the skin of a typical alpha male in order to feel confident.
But I’ve also heard from many men throughout the years who feel intimidated, out of place and even emasculated when they are the only dad at Gymboree, on the playground or at a birthday party. That has to change so more men will feel comfortable with taking on a bigger role in raising children. Is there anything as attractive as a rugged, macho (if you will) man tenderly caring for his kids?
You need to use the bathroom? Oooh. Go find Mommy.
I first realized I wanted to have kids when I was in my late 20s thanks largely to frequent interaction with my niece and nephew. Playing with those toddlers gave me a pleasure I had never before known. What’s more, I seemed to be a natural. They loved playing with me, too.
It wasn’t very far into my parenting career when I began to roll my eyes at my younger self. That clown who thought he had such a way with kids? He was doing little more than blowing in for 30-minute magic-carpet rides. Of course the kids loved playing with me. After all, playing is fun. That’s why it’s called (get this) playing. But if actual parenting had taught me anything it was that a handful of piggy back rides and super-effective zerberts hardly qualified me as a baby whisperer. To be a good dad, much more would be required of me.
Unless, of course, you take the recent findings of an Ohio State University study to heart.
10 things this mom might want to keep in mind.
When my wife was pregnant with her first child, she was hoping for a baby girl. Not because she didn’t want a boy, mind you, but because she was worried that she wouldn’t be able to relate to a boy as much as she would a girl. A son was a daunting proposition to her. And though I don’t have an official study to back me up, I suspect she’s not alone.
Caroline got her wish. Her first child, my stepchild, was a girl. But when she became pregnant with triplets, Caroline quickly realized that the law of averages suggested she’d give birth to at least one boy. It turned out to be two. And while she’s glad that she now has children of both genders, she’d be the first to admit the following: sometimes she just doesn’t get our boys.
Tom Matlack, co-founder of the site the GoodMenProject, has recently written an essay which gives moms who find themselves in the same boat as my wife some things to think about.
Ah, sticks. The endless possibilities they bring.
In December, Slate’s Explainer posted a list of questions that the knowledgeable one was either unable or unwilling to explain, inviting Slate’s readers to select the one that most deserved an answer. The 20,000 plus folks who chimed in had quite a range of questions from which to choose. If a person is allergic to cats, would he also be allergic to a lion? Are all languages equally lip-readable? Could mankind actually blow up the moon?
Compelling as those important queries may be, all three took a backseat to the winner: I’ve always pondered why boys like having sticks. Whether it be walking down a hiking trail with a stick they picked up or running a stick across a white picket fence, boys (including me when I was small) seem to have a knack for having a stick. Is there some kind of explanation for this behavior?
This question intrigued me on many levels. For one, I, myself, am a sucker for a good hiking stick. I select a new one every year during my annual backpacking trip. But my 9-year-old girl loves them, too. In explaining why boys like sticks, can the Explainer shed any light on what my daughter’s stick fetish says about her?
Lori Garcia 
Joslyn Gray 
Amber Doty 
Julianna Miner 
Monica Bielanko 
Sierra Black 
Meredith Carroll 
Carolyn Castiglia 
Sunny Chanel 
Madeline Holler 
Rebecca Odes 
Danielle Smith 
Danielle Sullivan 
Katherine Stone 
The Walt Disney Company supports Babble as a platform dedicated to honest, engaged, informed, intelligent and open conversation about parenting. However, the opinions expressed on this site are those of individual parents/writers and do not reflect the views of Disney. In addition, content provided on this site is for entertainment or informational purposes only and should not be construed as medical advice, diagnosis, treatment, or safety advice.
0