Wow. 1950 wants it’s article back.

Um, no. Those are all petty, stupid things to lie about. I prefer open, honest communication with my spouse and we have a 25 year relationship proving that strategy works. It’s not that I don’t tell white lies on occasion, but they’re more the type to spare my husband’s feelings (“No, I hadn’t noticed you put on 10 pounds over the holidays” or “Your hair doesn’t look any thinner than it did this time last year”) rather than lies to save my own ass when I’ve overspent or passive/aggressive digs about my MIL. And “I have a headache”? Really? How about, “I had a really hard day today and I don’t have the energy tonight”? All these sound like a recipe for resentment followed by divorce.

Yes, Linda TOO, this is a divorce ready to happen. What kind of relationship can survive that much deception? What WON’T you lie about? I just am not able, nor interesting, in lying to my husband. He’s not 6 and going to cry if I confirm that yes, he is going bald. And I’m not such an asshole that I can’t communicate the delicate stuff in a diplomatic or even winning way. If I don’t feel like having sex, I just say No. And he tells me the same. And we grab our books and crawl in bed and read instead – both of us happy.

yup, agree with above commenters. this was trying to be funny but just seemed rather sexist and hostile. my hubby and i both have wicked painful migraines, so lying about headaches seems especially cruel. there was another post about men that seemed more true to life and sillier, but this one…

wow, so much negativity, i found the article true n hilarious
n i’m willing to admit that i lie, OMG! n does it make a foul marraige, NO
talk about a stick up some of the commenterss bums

every marraige is different like every individual, u cant judge, so yeah if ure wana b honest w/ ure spouse, do it, i wnt judge, but u shouldn’t be judging someone else’s just because of a few white lies

I think what’s tripping some people up (myself included) is that there’s a difference between “little white lies” and “being unnecessarily passive agressive.” All of the above would be better for everyone if the lie weren’t told. And sorry, ladies, but it’s been proven that headaches are made better by having sex, not worse. If you aren’t in the mood (or have a restaurant you want to go to, or felt like buying a new pair of shoes), fess up to it and save everyone some grief.

I never realized so many PERFECT WOMEN read Babble! We can all learn from your pure and honest ways!

OR WE CAN ALL LIGHTEN THE HELL UP.

Yes, we’re all negative, perfect, and humorless because we don’t lie to our husband’s about stupid shit. You’ve got us pegged. ::eye roll::

Thanks for making me laugh, as always Amber. Everyone has at least THOUGHT one of these things in their mind and when I read it out loud to my husband he laughed too…..and we have great communication.

Honestly, I think lying about petty stuff like this is more of a symptom of being uptight, not the opposite. My husband is (probably painfully!) aware that I’m not perfect. I’m not trying to keep up an image of someone who always WOULD be ready for sex, if it weren’t for that pesky headache, or that I love everybody in the world so your annoying friends/relatives don’t bother me a bit, or that I look super hot in everything. It’s not so much that I’m too virtuous to lie, it’s just kind of … weird to me to think that if you don’t say certain things out loud they’re not actually true. My mom used to lie about her age and I always thought that was really peculiar too, like you’re younger just because you said a different number? Plus I am far too lazy to keep track of what I said which might lead to awkwardness. Far more strain in my home life than I am willing to tolerate.

It seems like posts like this are the bread and butter of a goodly portion of “mommy blogging” though, this and “parenting is sooooo hard, here’s this wacky bad stuff my kid put me through today….” it’s variations on a theme. This is why I can’t identify with so much of it.

I’m pretty sure if this article was from the 1950s, it would’ve talked about how to tie a prettier bow in your apron, at what time between 5:00 and 5:15 do you pour his beer to make sure its still cold when the husband walks in the door, and what OTC pain medications work best to mask the aching feet you’ve acquired from walking in heels all day- while vacuuming. Personally, I would appreciate an article like that, Amber – is there a reason you can’t be more serious about our duties as wives?! ;)

Establishing tone is the writer’s job. Maybe stick to chemistry.

I think this is hilarious the way everyone is taking this post so seriously because I know this writer personally and just like her mother IF her husband WERE to leave his old dental floss on the bathroom sink NO ONE would ever notice because the counter is covered with HER things SHE never bothers to put away!!!

Some times the commenters make for funnier reading than the actual blogs. Keep’em comin!

Seriously? This is a pretty damn sexist article and so trite. Any woman who says this crap is in a pathetic marriage and needs to learn how to speak up.

Wow, everyone at the defense now. “I NEVER lie to my husband, ever! *Gasp* The audacity of even JOKING about it! You insult me!” Pu~lease. This was amusing, and it took me scrolling through to “I’m Fine” to actually relate. Why so defensive about the stereotype is beyond me. You need to take these things with a grain of salt or just find hobbies to distract you from getting on the internet where you can get pissy at apparently offensive stereotypes and jokes.
Oh, and ps. If I do have to skip out on sex because of a headache, I have to think up another lie just so I don’t end up telling him, “I have a headache”. Boy, I think I’m due for those flame-prepped horns! XD

The only ones I’ve used are the I don’t care about where we eat, not because of the reason listed, but because I choose better when my list is narrowed down, and really almost anywhere we go I can find something I’m willing to eat anyways. I’ve also used the I’m fine, but only for the reason that I don’t want to talk about it until I can calm down enough to not start a huge fight about whatever is wrong. The rest I did find kind of funny only cause I know women who do that and then wonder why their little game just causes a fight.

lol=)

Amber GREAT article and I mean that BOTH me and my husband had a good laugh at this (I actually sent it to him) and we both laughed bc everyone of these was so me to a tee! Dont let these bold face liars tell you they are too perfect to have EVER told a white lie to their husbands. I remember when I was getting married my grandpa pulled me and my husband to the side and told us (keep in mind right before he died he and my grandmother had just celebrated their 71st wedding anniversary and in those 71 years those two were the happiest blissful couple you have ever met even in their golden years they were always public displaying their effection) he told a happy marriage will depend upon a few things 1-never go to bed angry always say i love you before going to bed 2- the wife is always right and 3- READY FOR THIS…..WHEN YOU GO TO GET YOUR HAIR DONE ITS ALWAYS HALF OF WHAT THE FULL PRICE IS – YOU KNOW WHAT HE HAD A SENSE OF HUMOR WHICH OBVIOUSLY NO ONE HAS ANYMORE…….. me and my husband always go round and round with the dinner menu and yes he will list options and yes normally ill kick most of them out and here is my reason i dont want to pick something he doesnt want so if he mentions something i wanting PERFECT we found a match. Ok on to the dessert yes I normally say no dessert im good because im full and dont want to pay for it later and dont want the added calories- BUT by the time his comes oh wait i changed my mind that does look good and im willing to suffer later to have gratification now (this was actually in one of my psychology books in school that people naturally lie to themselves about thing that offer pleasure and once its their they fold and give in and the dessert was the example they used. 3 – dress YES YES YES I have done this both when we were dating (bc i didnt want it to look like i was too “eager” and playing the “hard to get”and now since we have been married (happily) for 16 years, I say that because yes I will go shopping and bc im such a bargain shopper I can 20 things for the price of one and my husband doest understand the concept of how to do that he figures ok she had 20 dollars bugeted to shop and she brought all this home she obvisouly spent 200 (well news flash I only spent 10) so half the stuff I throw in the back and pull them out at a later time (and I also do this because yes while im very thrifty and bargain hunting he hated when i bring more stuff home bc its a joke in our house im the hoarder so to avoid the whole your such a hoarder thing I just dont tell him- NOW COME ON LADIES YOU ALL KNOW A LADY HAS TO GET ONE OR TWO NEW OUTFITS A YEAR (AND YES THATS ALL I BUY FOR MYSELF IS ONE OR TWO A YEAR ) 4- the half the price hair cut ok back up to earlier part of this about what my grandfather told me- plus im sure all of us at some point or other have fudged of a buck or two off the actual real price not decieve but to just avoid a argument at some point in their relationship AND again because as long as its not hurting anything or the checkbook and as long as we arent talking hundreds hell as long as we arent talking more than 50 again DONT SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF! and dont get me started on the 5th one because every single wife has either hid or gotten rid of SOMETHING of their husbands even if a pair of undies! 6th one the nothing im fine- you are freaking lying if you said you have NEVER IN YOUR SINGLE MARRIED LIFE EVER ONCE SAID NOTHING because sometimes again its not worth the fight (pick your battles once again) or you just dont want to talk about it or maybe its just your just so tired you just literally dont have the energy to explain what it is that is bothering you weither its the way people responded to your blog today and were flat out bitches because no one has respect for anyone anymore and apparently no one is allowed to voice their opinion or vent about something where thats what a blog was created for or you just simply feel like your going vomit if you have to look at one more self rightous bitch. 7th- Friends ok so while yes i love all of my husbands friends their are defentally peps of his i havent been to found of (and with ex boyfriends they defentally had friends that i didnt like for one reason or another but point is their is going to be someone in his circle of people he knows and your not going to like all of them and normally decent people with class and respect for others feelings arent going to just going to come out and say I hate that low life because “he thinks hes just perfect and
never does anything wrong because he thinks hes a perfect flawless person” NO YOU ARE NOT THE TYPE WHO LIKES TO MAKE PEOPLE FEEL BAD AND HURT THEIR FEELINGS so you simply bite your tounge or nod your head when they are around. 8th-the YES your right honey ok again im going back to my grandpas advice shes always right thing- only ok ive grown up a bit in the years and yes i realize im not always right BECAUSE IM NOT IMMATURE IM A BIG GIRL AND KNOW IM NOT ALWAYS RIGHT AND TWO I KNOW IM NOT PERFECT AND I MAKE MISTAKES TOO AND SOME PEOPLE ARE TOO FULL OF THEMSELVES TO REALIZE THEY MAKE MISTAKES TOO. But sometimes I just want to end the argument and my husband is the type to just keep going and going (and then their is times we will both debate our sides for hours because we both should of would of could of been attorneys politicans etc and finally it will normally get to a point where one of us will finally say ok your right my shows on or the kids need their bath now or you get the point! 9- And do NOT tell me not one of you has EVER asked your husband does this make me look fat or look bad?? (and the way some of you have shown your true colors on your attitude I’m sure as hell your husbands have lied to you by say no honey you look so skinny or no that looks awesome on you because if they told you the truth Id be scared as hell to be them just after seeing the way you treated this poor woman for HER article and CONSIDERING MOST A-HOLES LOOK THEY ATE THE WHOLE FARM (-in the rear and else where) AND like the like they dressed themselves in the dark from a clowns closet im willing to bet most of are fibbed to about that but after the way you harped on her for this Im sure you would end up eating your husband if he actually told you the truth so this one right here has just been proved you lied! ok on the tenth one everyone is going to have a few thing quirks or habbits your dont like about the hubby thats is a given because again (ready for this this ones a kicker ) NOT EVERYONE IS PERFECT!!!! so yes your have something you may not like and secretly wish could change or get better – but again maybe you guys are telling the truth because ME personally I dont like to hurt peoples feelings and make them feel bad BECAUSE THOSE ARE CALLED BULLIES ( remember Bambi- when thumper said if you cant say something nice dont say anything at all) plus people its called manors its rude and mean and harrassment when tell someone their is something you dont like about them B-E-C-A-U-S-E- IT H-U-R-T-S THEIR F-E-E-L-I-N-G-S AND ITS R-U-D-E SO yes maybe me and Amber are the only ones telling “white lies” in that one ASk yourself this one is their anything he does in bed and you say oh yeah i like that or that feels good when really its not???? because acording to you guys thats “lying” which will end up in divorce so watch out!! AND LASTLY THE MOTHER IN LAW YES YES YES YES YES! AND HELL YES I DONT TELL THE TRUTH ANYMORE!! BECAUSE I have maire from everyone loves raymond for a mil so while yes at first I was constanly telling him everything and telling him he needs to say something blah blah blah but after years of both me and him fighting battles with her anymore we jsut dont care so if she says something i put her in her place then hubby asks how it went and i say fine ok i guess im a terrible person for lying send me to hell! but you know what for years he has been treated like crap by her and has gotten in fight after fight with her and hes just sick of fighting plus after her having a heart attack breast cancer and strokes and completly clogged artieries she could go at any moment so anymore yes i keep it to myself and tell him our visit went wonderful (granted ill call my mom and vent to her – but as long as you have a strong support system its fine you have to a outlet to vent to EVERYONE does so im not hurting his feelings by making him feel worse about what his mom said saving a fight between those two and then saving a fight between us AND im getting it off my chest by venting to someone else we are all happy and it works out AND MOST OF ALL WE ARE ALL HAPPY WITH OURSELVES AND WITH EACH OTHER OUR MARRIAGE IS PEACEFUL AND FILLED WITH LOVED AND HAPPYNESS

AND WE ARE NOT BULLIES SO FRANKLY I CAN LIVE WITH MY SELF WHICH IS SOMETHING I WOULD NOT BE ABLE TO LIVE WITH MY SELF IF I WAS READING ARTICLES AND MAKING PEOPLE FEEL LIKE SHIT OVER IT YOU DONT AGREE WITH SOMETHING OR LIKE IT GET THE HELL OFF HER BLOG!! A BLOG IS FOR SOMEONE TO WRITE THEIR OPINION AND OR BELIEFS OR JOURNAL NOW MATTER WHAT SHAPE OR FORM AND IT IS A OUTLET FOR PEOPLE TO VENT TO GET STUFF OFF THEIR MIND IN A HEALTHY WAY SO YOU ALL NEED TO APOLOGIZE TO THIS AUTHOR FOR YOUR RUDE AND DISRESPECTFUL WORDS IT IS TRUELY PEOPLE LIKE YOU WHO ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THE BULLIES OF THE WORLD WHO HAVE NO RESPECT FOR OTHERS WHICH IS THE REASON FOR THE LACK OF MORALS AND VALUES AND RESPECT IN OUR COUNTRY TODAY WHICH IS WHY OUR ECONOMY IS IN THE STATE ITS IN BECAUSE HOW OUR MORAL STANDARD HAS BECAME NONEXISTENT IN OUR COUNTRY! I HOPE THIS MAKES SOME OF YOU OPEN YOUR EYES TO SEE HOW TRULY DISRESPECTFUL SOME OF YOU WERE

im honest with my husband…is that why we have alot of stupid fights lol?