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Judge Rules Against Cancer-Stricken Mom in Child Custody Case

Posted by meredith carroll on May 7th, 2011 at 7:17 pm
200915 127431174000597 127024814041233 188701 6044979 o 225x300 Judge Rules Against Cancer Stricken Mom in Child Custody Case

Alaina Giordano and her kids

I can see taking children away from their mother if she were unfit. You know, if she were, say, abusing drugs or abusing the kids. But because she has an advanced yet contained diagnosis of breast cancer? That’s not only cruel, but discriminatory.

That’s what’s happening in the case of Alaina Giordano. She and her husband are divorcing and the judge in the case has decided that since there’s “no telling how long she’ll live,” he should be able to move the kids, ages 5 and 11, out of state to where he’s been living and working since last August.

Never mind that there are allegedly documented instances when Alaina reported her soon-to-be ex for physically abusing her. Never mind that Alaina’s doctors couldn’t be more amazed at her progress in responding to treatment, and that her cancer is contained. Never mind that even if she wanted to, Alaina can’t leave the state, too, at the moment, without risking an interruption to her cancer treatment.

Alaina already moved once after she received her cancer diagnosis and it was because her husband said he wanted to further his education. But after three years living in North Carolina, her young children have put down roots and she’s now fortunate to receive treatment at one of the best cancer treatment centers in the world — the Duke Cancer Institute.

Two years ago her husband left the family for four months to pursue a job opportunity, visiting on weekends but never giving his wife the address where he was living. When he did come home, Alaina often called domestic abuse hotlines.

When her husband announced in January 2010 that he wanted to leave yet again for another job opportunity, Alaina said she needed to stay put for the sake of her treatment and their kids. That was when he filed for separation and custody of their kids. She didn’t know at the time that he already had a lawyer on retainer as well as a secret bank account.

The judge in the case says the documented instances of calls to domestic violence helplines and the people who witnessed the abuse aren’t at issue, but Alaina’s prognosis is. But would a ruling in Alaina’s favor mean her ex would realize he should stay in-state if he wants to see his kids? Will the judge consider the possibility that it could be in the best interest of the kids to stay with their mom for as long as possible? Could it possibly be true that a woman is losing custody of her kids because she’s being treated for cancer? Shouldn’t she be able to see her kids more if she’s that sick?

A Facebook page has been set up for Alaina to raise awareness of her case. And since she’s unable to match her ex in court in terms of financial resources and an attorney, I’m guessing that she’s accepting donations.

Let’s hope the judge in this case either knows something we don’t or will see to it to reverse her ruling (yes, the judge is a woman).

Do you think the judge’s ruling seems fair or discriminatory?

Image: Facebook

 Judge Rules Against Cancer Stricken Mom in Child Custody Case

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9 Comments

[...] did Giordano respond?She put a internet to work for her, starting a blog seeking readers to “Say NO! to CANCER discrimination!” A childhood [...]

The mom who lost her kids because she has breast cancer (The Week) | searchnews.us commented on May 26 11 at 5:11 pm

Please visit http://www.change.org to sign the petition for Alaina’s cause

Lauren commented on May 07 11 at 11:58 pm

I hope she gets a pro bono atorney, and fast.

Boston Mama commented on May 08 11 at 4:39 pm

I thought that I had heard it all. Being a Breast Cancer Survivor this is a slap in the face.

jackjoy commented on May 08 11 at 4:59 pm

the judge in the case obviously knows more than you. It would be fair to say this article is discriminatory without having any of the facts. Further, there are a lot of libelous statements on here, it would be smart of you to stop spreading lies which damage a person’s character.

jane commented on May 08 11 at 11:55 pm

@jane, you are ridiculous. there is nothing libelous here, just what is already documented. plenty of family court judges make horrible decisions without considering all the facts. i hope she appeals.

daria commented on May 09 11 at 12:19 pm

I’d like to know in what realm is this a good decision. Probably the same realm that considers a man that would embark on this course of action a good father.

Mistress_Scorpio commented on May 09 11 at 2:25 pm

The system better make sure she coughs up her child support, 100%, and in full every 30 days…otherwise they should lock her up in jail for nonsupport of her children….

Her kids can’t wait for her to get a job or get healthy…they need support now….and if she can’t pay…make sure they accrue up to her previous earnings and bill her Estate if she doesn’t make it back to health. What is fair is fair and equal is equal. No special treatment for non-custodials as a woman…

and btw..who cares whether the Judge is a male or female…they are impartial unless you are publicly advocating for outright bigotry and discrimination by gender in Family Court. Is that your expectation?

Furthermore, the NC Appeals Court just approved being able to go back multiple years and compute child support based on bank statements.

http://www.wiredprnews.com/2011/05/02/raleigh-family-lawyers-court-oks-prior-bank-statements-to-decide-child-support_2011050218942.html

SharedParentingisBestForKids commented on May 09 11 at 6:24 pm

All family courts have trouble dealing with abuse situations. Mostly because abusers often come off as in control and suave, while the abused come off as traumatized. Because, well, they are. The prejudices against abused women are deeply ingrained in the system.

steelrigged commented on May 10 11 at 4:34 pm

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