Another rape survivor agreeing with you. Bad birth experiences can be assault, especially if consent is not given, but it isn’t rape. Let’s not start co-opting and playing one-up-womanship on suffering.

100% agree

Very good article. I’m sincerely sorry for what you went through- both times.

Totally agree. “Rape” is a word that I see thrown around more and more these days, in referring to things that are nowhere close to it. “Nazi” is another one.

JEssica, if you want to go by that definition we could start calling robbery “property rape”. Let’s not. Rape has a clear definition (forcing or using threat of force, coercing a person into sexual activity) in its usage, and applying that way-too-broad dictionary (which one, please?) definition to experiences like traumatic birth experiences is not going to do any good.

Great article, Sierra.

I’m going to have to disagree. I think that there are times when birth trauma is rape. When I had my son the nurse continued to put her fingers in my butt (to be honest I’m still not sure why) despite me repeatedly asking her to stop because it was hurting me. This behavior would be rape if she were not a nurse. During most of my labor and delivery I had flashbacks to my abuse as a child. People were doing things to my body without my consent and they didn’t stop when I said “no”. If you felt like you were being raped and you call it birth rape I’m fine with that. It’s your pain, deal with it however you want.

I agree with Jessica about definitions. It may not be the smartest choice for the “birth movement”, but then again, we’re talking about it, aren’t we? Reading the comments from readers over on Salon and DoubleXX, it’s very clear that many people think women should just lay back and be grateful they don’t die in childbirth, no matter what doctors do to them. The very mainstream view of modern birth practices is a bit disturbing because there is alot of acceptance of things that are just wrong for a human to have to submit to. Anyway, it is very close to the general idea of rape anyway, since birth is intricately related to a woman’s sexuality (whether one wants to admit it or not).

How do we know the motives, really? We always hear rape is not about sex, for the rapist, it’s about power (like they say this when someone rapes an old lady, etc…) Some of the things described in the hospital setting are also very much about power. It’s just institutionalized, so it’s “OK”.

yeah, and the mothers and elder women in certain African villages think they’re doing right by forcing clitorectomies on their daughters, too…it really doesn’t matter what the perpetrator thinks…I am actually surprised at the lack of sensitivity displayed for other womens experiences

Yes, the women who practice FGM do think that they’re doing what’s best for their daughters. Doctors once thought that putting women totally out to give birth was what was best. You address those well-meaning individuals by convincing them that their actions are NOT what’s best, not putting medical professionals on the defensive. Some medical professionals may indeed be using their position of authority to get a sexual thrill out of operating without their patients’ consent…but, really, do you think that’s where *most* instances of traumatic birth stem from? By all means, if we think a doctor or nurse is setting out to humiliate, dominate, or terrify a patient he or she should be dealt with accordingly, but I don’t think that’s the case with most doctors who do end up traumatizing patients. Think of it this way…a dentist who is careless about testing to see if the patient is numb before drilling is a bad dentist. A dentist who does not apologize for accidently brushing a female patient’s breast while working is a bad dentist. But neither one is setting out to harm the patient, and approaching these careless or foolhardy dentists in the same way as a sadist who intentionally drilled before the patient was numb or intentionally groped a patient would not get anyone very far.

Bob, you may be right the terminology may be used to inflame people reactions, but I don’t think it is meant to put good doctors or nurses on the defensive. I do believe there are bad doctors and nurses in our hospitals. I have dealt with plenty of nurses and doctors who have attempted to belittle me (not in the birth/childcare realm) and bully me into doing things I already said no to. So I can imagine where this does happen while people are giving birth and more severely violating them by expressly going against their wishes. People may want to couch these violations with softer terms or sugar coat them for the general public, how is that any more truthful than using the term rape.

And Jenny, what the dentist did wouldn’t be consider rape, it would be considered molestation when he “accidentally” grazes the boob. If he were to continue the molestation after the patient has voiced her complaint then it would fall under rape.

I have enjoyed having this passionate intercourse with you all.

I agree. It seems to negate or even trivialize the experience of women who have been raped. Plus it makes you seem like a hysterical person who is not capable of reason. Like calling Obama Hitler or referring to women as Womyn.

As a rape and sexual assault survivor, I am totally comfortable with the term ‘birth rape’. Rape is penetration without consent, and birth rape is indeed that.

A woman has every right to describe her experiences as she sees fit. For some that may be ‘birth rape’ for others ‘birth violation’. We should not diminish the experience by arguing over how it’s worded.
@Ludicrous Mama you are lucky to think that you do not have to do what medical staff say during birth. If you have been given an epidural or drugged to help labor progress, walking away or moving away is not an option and medical staff can do things against a woman’s will and without her consent.
Birthing partners aren’t necessarily experienced and often accept the medical staff know what they are doing (and don’t realise that frequent vaginal examinations aren’t necessary and permission should always be obtained). Not all countries offer a choice of doctor/midwife either.
Rape isn’t about the motivation of the perpetrator but the effect on the victim. Medical staff don’t intend to rape or violate a women, most think they are acting in the best interests of the baby. But the best interests of the baby is a mother who feels she has been supported through birth (even a c-section) and is ready to bond with her baby. Not a mother who has been traumatized.

CHRIST!!!!!!!!!

We all need to go sit in our respective corners and cry until we can be good and get along and communicate like big kids.

Here you all are ARGUING SEMANTICS rather than doing a DAMN THING to help ANYONE! Well, I hope *you* can pat yourself on the back for arguing the word “rape”this way, and you for arguing it the other.

And so on and so forth. It doesn’t matter if you call it “birth rape” or “birth trauma” or “hospital purple polkadotted probing”, it is what it is, and something needs to be done about it.

PS we give each and every word we as human beings use a certain power. “rape” may fit webster’s, but step off; it’s taken. The “birth *rape*” movement will only be scoffed at, BELIEVE YOU ME, until there is a word that isn’t completely claimed already. (and, well, you could grab a thesaurus, but “birth pillage and plunder” just doesn’t have that sweet ring to it…)