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Should Bars Refuse to Serve Pregnant Women?
Over at The Stir, Annie Krasnow writes about her pregnant friend who visited New Orleans with her husband on a “babymoon.”
In her seventh month of pregnancy, this mom-to-be sat down at a quiet restaurant with her husband. Ready for a relaxing evening, she ordered a glass of Chardonnay. The waitress refused to serve her. “We don’t serve pregnant women here,” she reportedly said. Krasnow doesn’t tell us what her friend said in response, but I’m guessing she was shocked and upset.
Krasnow points out that some may argue that the fetus can’t protect itself. But what comes next? Do we start mandating that pregnant women avoid junk food or cigarettes? Should we mandate where pregnant women work and whom they live with. Don’t pregnant women have rights too?
“It seems that when women are pregnant, they become public property,” writes Krasnow. “I’m not condoning pregnant women getting drunk, but I don’t think that waitress should be allowed to make that decision for anyone but herself.”
Some comments to Krasnow’s post wondered whether a mother could sue a bar for serving her alcohol if her baby turned out to have fetal alcohol syndrome or other medical issues. I did some research and apparently, in some states, it is against the law to serve alcohol to a pregnant woman. In general, however, it is illegal for a bartender to refuse a certain group of people unless there is a specific reason, such as drunkenness (Disclaimer: I’m not a lawyer.)
My take: unless a pregnant woman is drunk, she should be served. Many doctors and midwives now say that a drink or so a week during pregnancy will not harm the fetus. When I was pregnant with my first daughter, my husband and I went on a “babymoon” to the south of France. My midwife gave me special dispensation to drink a glass of wine a day. “After all, the French women do it,” she said.
I have to side with the American Civil Liberties Union on this issue. ”Do we really want to make a pregnant woman’s behavior and choices…a crime because it could hurt the fetus?” asks the author of the Blog of Rights. “Allowing the government to exercise such unlimited control over women’s bodies, and every aspect of their lives, would essentially reduce pregnant women to second-class citizens, denying them the basic constitutional rights.”
What do you think? Was the waitress out of line? Or did she make the right call?
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Can Pregnancy Diet Include Wine Tasting? | Strollerderby commented on Sep 22 10 at 2:21 pmjenny tries too hard commented on Aug 16 10 at 10:39 amBars should serve whichever adults of legal drinking age the owner chooses to serve. If a bar owner isn’t comfortable serving a visibly pregnant woman (and I wouldn’t be, no matter what they do in in France) she still has the right to go to another bar, or purchase some wine or beer or whatever and drink it at home. There isn’t a basic constitutional right to service in a private establishment, particularly a bar. If there were, everyone who ever stood in line outside a trendy club and didn’t get in would have a case.
JZ commented on Aug 16 10 at 10:48 amI know I would feel uncomfortable serving a pregnant woman alcohol.
Maggie commented on Aug 16 10 at 10:59 amThe waitress is totally out of line. One glass of wine is a lot different from abusing alcohol. Even pregnant women have the right to control their own bodies. And the bar owner is not allowed to discriminate against other people … skin color, religion, country of origin, and sexual orientation all come to mind.
Not to mention that some women appear to be pregnant, according to the shape of their bodies, who are not. Can’t you just imagine the conversation with a waitress who says “We don’t serve pregnant women here” to a woman who has recently been delivered of a stillborn child? How about a woman who has been valiantly struggling with a weight problem? or someone who has a colostomy (which often makes a low-belly bulge)?
If a bar owner isn’t comfortable serving a visibly bearded man would you say that’s the bar owner’s right?
–Maggie, a former pregnant woman who thought it appropriate to have the right to control my own body
jenny tries too hard commented on Aug 16 10 at 11:07 amMaggie…you have the right to control your own body, absolutely. What you don’t have is the right to control someone else’s bar taps or wine bottles.
michelle commented on Aug 16 10 at 11:40 amSo if bar owners have the right to refuse to serve pregnant women based on their own prejudices (clearly it’s not based on actual science), are you saying they can refuse to serve African Americans? What’s the difference?
NMNY commented on Aug 16 10 at 11:48 amThe problem is, as I understand it, women are not a protected class. So a bar couldn’t refuse to serve a person on the basis of race but is completely within their rights to refuse to serve a pregnant woman.
It’s a legal thing but clearly not in step with the most fundamental principles on which this nation was founded. I think it’s. very interesting question because could challenge this we might be able to indirectly specifically establish the principle of reproductive choice so that it would rest not simply on illegal searches and seizure but on women’s right not to be prevented from making her own decisions.
michelle commented on Aug 16 10 at 11:50 amPregnant women can be interpreted as a protected class.
Suzy commented on Aug 16 10 at 12:01 pmYou also have the right not to eat at that restaurant. I would have left immediately. While I was pregnant, I occasionally had a glass of wine in front of me at dinner, but I usually just had a sip or two to make me feel human again. It’s about the dining process, not really the drinking for me. One such occasion was my five-year wedding anniversary…we made a toast and then my husband drank the rest of my glass. Personally, I think not serving a pregnant woman alcohol is ridiculous…if someone has a drinking problem, they’re not drinking a glass of wine on their baby moon…they are likely drinking out of the public eye. Also, if I want to buy wine and beer at a liquor store for a party – am I not allowed to do that while pregnant too? Give me a break. Let’s allow adult women a little personal responsibility – this country would NEVER pass a comparable law limiting men’s rights.
Laura Vanderkam commented on Aug 16 10 at 12:16 pmAn individual bar owner can do what he wishes, but there are problems with this policy. First, by “pregnant women” the waitress means “visibly pregnant women.” The most dangerous time to drink is in the beginning of a pregnancy, when you’re not showing at all – not when you’re 7 months along. Second, alcohol is probably not the most dangerous thing women consume during pregnancy. As recent studies are showing, putting on too much weight during pregnancy puts a fetus at higher health risks later on in life — so frankly, the bar should refuse to serve pregnant women french fries, desserts, etc., if they’re concerned about the health of the fetus and want to be consistent. I’m guessing they don’t do that.
Meghan commented on Aug 16 10 at 12:58 pmRefusing to serve pregnant women is patronizing and paternal. Like Suzy said, what about the grocery store? So you can’t buy alcohol for a party or for your husband if you’re pregnant? What about soft cheese? Cold cuts? Non-organic food? Junk food? Kitty litter? It’s a slippery slope.
goddess commented on Aug 16 10 at 1:03 pmCan a bar or restaurant owner legally refuse to serve women? If not, they cannot refuse to serve a woman who may or may not be gestating. Asking her if she is would be a violation of her privacy rights as well as HIPAA . In other words, it’;s none of their business.
Laure68 commented on Aug 16 10 at 1:18 pmYou really cannot underestimate the fear of being sued. If something went wrong, even if it was not due to alcohol, the mother might come back and sue the restaurant for serving her. Given a sympathetic jury and the right lawyer she could win.
Also, I don’t like it when people say “they do it in France all the time”. First of all, this is happening less with pregnant women today. (They are being told they should not drink alcohol.) Also, I have seen restaurants in France regularly refuse to serve pregnant women raw vegetables with a very judgmental tone. (The French view this as something very bad to eat during pregnancy due to the risk of e coli, listeria, etc.)
goddess commented on Aug 16 10 at 1:26 pmHowever, I’d be much more likely to sue the establishment for gender discrimination ;-) Get the ACLU on board, call the local news stations, public protests, the whole 9 yards.
BTW- none of the OBs from the various practices over the course of 6 pregnancies and 14 years, EVER told me I could not enjoy the occasional glass of wine (about 1 per week was their recommendation).
NMNY commented on Aug 16 10 at 1:33 pmMichele, perhaps I should have said pregnant women (though I think that means all women) aren’t a protected class in this regard. I wish it weren’t true but in this case it is. I looked into this about a year ago when this was happening in my neighborhood and discovered that we basically have no civil rights. Bar and restaurant owners can discriminate against us to their heart’s content and they’re still within the law.
Laure68 commented on Aug 16 10 at 1:40 pmI kind of see what you are saying. One thing that makes me sympathetic to the bartender is what is written on the warnings on bottles of alcohol, posted at bars, etc.
“GOVERNMENT WARNING: (1) According to the Surgeon general, women should not drink alcoholic beverages during pregnancy because of the risk of birth defects. (2) Consumption of alcoholic beverages impairs your ability to drive a car or operate machinery, and may cause health problems. ”
The first item has to do with pregnant women. The second item has to do with driving and operating machinery. You can’t expect a bartender to be up on the latest research, and with this staring them in the face all day you can’t be surprised they hesitate in serving pregnant women.
Maybe someone should ask why a public agency wrote the warning like this.
jenny tries too hard commented on Aug 16 10 at 1:43 pmIt may be patronizing and paternal. Or it may be reflective of a bar owner’s fear of lawsuits. Or it may be plain jerkish behavior. But if someone owns a bar, or a liquor store, or a deli, he or she has the right to be patronizing, paternal, cautious, or jerkish. And anyone who disagrees has the right to take their money elsewhere. Think about the line outside a club, again…they have the right to refuse to serve someone just for being dorky, or pregnant, or old because the club is private property.
goddess commented on Aug 16 10 at 1:57 pmIs the nature of being female less deserving of protection from discrimination than race? Ethnicity? Can said bartender refuse to serve people of Arab descent? Those with black skin? Being female is no less worthy of protection by law from inequality IMHO.
Elizabeth commented on Aug 16 10 at 1:58 pmAs seems to be the consensus, I think it’s completely ridiculous and offensive to refuse to serve alcohol to a pregnant woman, but it’s still the restaurant owner’s right to do so. I’m currently 9 months pregnant, and when I go out to eat, generally order a beer or a glass of wine. Not one waiter has batted an eyelash. If I received rude comments, I would speak to management, and if they refused to serve me alcohol, I would simply leave, and take my money elsewhere.
Meghan commented on Aug 16 10 at 4:25 pmI understand that bar owners have the right to refuse service to anyone: pregnant women, those wearing turbans on their heads or crosses around their necks, those wearing Sarah Palin T-shirts, those who wear Obama/Biden buttons, and those who are just too ugly to be seen. I also think that bar owners have the right to allow smokers in their establishments if they want, and that seems to be going away as well. I’m curious as to why more people aren’t outraged by the waitress’ attitude. I understand we live in a litigious society, but why single out pregnant women? I would think it would be far more likely that a regular who frequents a bar everyday is an alcoholic and has a case. Or an obese person who orders a cheeseburger. I’m no lawyer, but wouldn’t the burden of proof be on the plaintiff? So, if you’re pregnant and order a glass of wine at a bar, then something goes wrong with your pregnancy or your child develops some sort of cognitive disorder, wouldn’t you have to prove it was due to alcohol consumption and then prove it was alcohol from that certain establishment?
Meghan commented on Aug 16 10 at 4:31 pmIt seems that people really believe they have input regarding a woman’s pregnancy. I find that contradictory to what a lot of people believe regarding how they raise their kids. We as parents want the right to decide medical decisions regarding our children (vaccinations, pro/anti-circumcision) as well as religion, diet, lifestyle, etc. Don’t those decisions start at pregnancy, not birth?
motope commented on Aug 16 10 at 10:43 pmThis is just shameful. Why does everyone feel like they have a right to voice their opinions about a pregnant women. I’m an adult, and I think that I should be able to/will not harm the baby by having ONE glass of wine once in a while. Plus, a glass of wine in the US makes people faint, but an pregnant women eating fast food and piles of candy bars is met with giggles or smiles. Americans need to grow up about alcohol consumed in moderation by pregnant women and mind their own business. Go obsess about the kids eating processed, dye and hormone filled foods that are given/sold to American children on a daily basis. That is something to truly be horrified about.
Mistress_Scorpio commented on Aug 16 10 at 10:50 pmIt also seems that quite a few believe in the idea that the free market will weed out businesses that practice discriminatory behavior, whether against pregnant women or anyone else. History does not concur with that theory.
Laure68 commented on Aug 16 10 at 11:07 pm@Meghan – “wouldn’t you have to prove it was due to alcohol consumption and then prove it was alcohol from that certain establishment?” One problem with our system of using a jury of our peers is that a good lawyer can use emotional tactics to convince a jury that the plaintiff was wronged. People are very sympathetic to pregnant women and babies. It wouldn’t be that difficult to cite the warning that pregnant women should not drink at all and show the woman drank at the establishment. Lawsuits have been won with less. OB’s are the most highly sued of all doctors because it is so easy to win an emotional case.
I really wish this was not the case and everyone could make decisions for themselves.
Laure68 commented on Aug 16 10 at 11:22 pm@Mistress_Scorpio – I couldn’t see where someone was suggesting that the free market would weed out discriminatory practices. For me I can’t understand why this is discriminatory. (I know I am in the minority here.) A bartender has this warning staring him in the face all day that says women should not drink. Bartenders are not doctors, so why should they think this is not true. Then a pregnant women asks for a drink and he has to consider the consequences. For example, a bar can be held accountable if someone leaves drunk, drives, and causes an accident.
It always drove me nuts that the government warning put the risks to pregnant women above those of drunk driving, which is a larger public health risk. However, maybe we should be complaining about this warning and not the bartender/waiter who has to make a decision based on this information.
goddess commented on Aug 17 10 at 10:46 amDoes not the same bartender face liability for furnishing drunks with alcohol before they plow into other cars/pedestrians? Hypocritical and unequal.
Laure68 commented on Aug 17 10 at 11:53 am@goddess – I actually thought that they were. At least I remember a few bartenders/bars being sued for this. (Letting someone drive drunk after drinking at their establishment.)
jenny tries too hard commented on Aug 19 10 at 10:08 amThey don’t just get sued, they are sometimes actually criminally prosecuted and the server’s certification to serve alcohol and the establishment’s liquor license can be revoked.
Rosana commented on Aug 19 10 at 1:47 pmMaybe that is a rule at that establishment, if so, then yes, she made the right call because is her job to follow the rules.
Jonah commented on Sep 01 10 at 3:16 pmThis is a case where feminism has led to a muddled way of thinking whereby there is a conflating of a “rights”, race and personal freedom’s issue. Race is an immutable characteristic unlike drinking which is an action. Also, saying its’ “my choice” and “my problem” to drink while pregnant is fallacious. Your “choice” can directly harm the fetus. Look, throughout gestation the zygote-embryo-fetus and the mother’s body are symbiotically linked, existing in the same physical space and sharing the same risks. So when YOU drink while pregnant you risk harming the child and society has an interest in seeing that the next generation is born healthy. So the analogy to obesity, which is an individual action that harms the individual eating, is incomplete.
Likewise, bar owners can discriminate based on gender. The constitution is silent about private entities practicing discrimination and because it is not protected category, like race, color, religion, or national origin well within the boundaries of the law.
I find that argument that prohibiting pregnant women from drinking in bars as a “slippery slope” unpersuasive, because this case is not about discrimination, it’s about out of control women that cannot handle their drink and are upset that a waitress, meaning a fellow woman said you are WRONG and this establishment will not be a part of your madness for the interest of the child. I would have given the waitress a bonus and flowers.
Given what is known about FAS, why not take a “better safe than sorry” approach as opposed to waiting for a bullet proof study or relying on the subjective–“my friend/mom/sister/relative drank a little so it MUST be ok” logic ? The lady and others on this blog that say its ok, never minding what’s in the best interest of the child are just plain selfish and are drunks. If not, you could eliminate the liquor for 9-18 months. Seriously, is it really that hard to put the goblet down?
Katydid commented on Sep 07 10 at 6:42 am“Seriously, is it really that hard to put the goblet down?”
Well, Jonah, you need to direct that question at your fellow men. Men are more likely to drink more than women on average. Men are more likely to drink and drive than women causing far more fatal car accidents. Men are more likely to physically and/or sexually assault someone when drinking. Men who are domestic violence perpetrators tend to drink more than other men. Pregnant women are far more vulnerable to domestic violence than at other times (especially being hit in the abdomen causing miscarriages and premature deliveries). Considering these facts; maybe you men should be prohibited from drinking as a gender. After all, society has a vested interest in making sure everyone is protected from the mostly male drunks causing the majority of the fatal car accidents, physical and sexual assaults, and domestic violence in general. These things are far more common than the occasionally alcoholic pregnant woman hurting her fetus scenarios. Yeah, I’m sure being told you can’t have a drink because your more likely to get behind the wheel of a car or rape someone due to being a male is going to go over real well with most of the male population. Before I get accused of it, I’m not endorsing that pregnant women drink alcohol. However, I think your argument that this is the case of out of control pregnant women rather than a case of discrmination a specious argument. The antics of out-of-control men who can’t handle their licquor impacts society far more than women-pregnant or otherwise.
goddess commented on Sep 14 10 at 10:12 amLOL- and somehow- having ONE glass of wine during my anniversaries while pregnant did not result in me being/becoming a”drunk”, nor any of those 4 children being born with FAS. Get over yourself Jonah.
kaare commented on Sep 22 10 at 2:03 amServe them or get sued. They’ll need the money having a retarded child living with them for the rest of their lives.
Amy commented on Oct 28 10 at 7:37 pmIt has nothing to do with the woman’s race or anyone’s race! As a waitress you’re put in a difficult place because we’ve been told that’s it not healthy or right for a pregnant women to drink just like its not healthy if she smokes. Honestly you can’t refuse her but I would have gotten someone else to serve her. If she wants to drink that is her choice but a waiter or waitress should not be forced to give her wine or whatever, do it in your own home I say and save everyone the discomfort!
Brittney commented on Nov 01 10 at 12:17 amFunny how if a women would walk into a bar with their one year old on their hip and gave them alcohol, people would be in an uproar, but when its in the womb, hell who cares. All that matters is what the mother wants right??? Who cares about the child since it isn’t born yet. Really??? WOW
Terri commented on Dec 31 10 at 3:18 amI think it should be against the law ! A very pregnant woman ( 7 to 9 months) came into the restaurant that I work at tonight and I was forced to serve her a top shelf margarita or lose my job.I absolutely wanted nothing to do with it and I was so upset about it ,that I was shaking and crying.She may not have cared about her innocent unborn child but I did.I had never felt so violated before. I had to compromise my morals and integrity in order to keep the job that feeds my children. I hate her for doing that to me. I feel that I have done something very wrong and I am so ashamed that I had a part in it.It’s not fair to us servers and bartenders to have to be put into that situation. If people want to drink while pregnant and potentailly cause harm to the fetus, that’s one thing but innocent people shouldn’t have to be forced to do something that they feel is morally wrong.
Frogette commented on Apr 08 11 at 1:50 am“My midwife gave me special dispensation to drink a glass of wine a day. “After all, the French women do it,” she said”: mmm, not so. People here are just as paranoid about alcohol in pregnancy than they are in North America. My sister drank like half a glass on three occurrences during her pregnancy, and each time everyone present was insanely judgmental with her.
“Also, I have seen restaurants in France regularly refuse to serve pregnant women raw vegetables with a very judgmental tone (The French view this as something very bad to eat during pregnancy due to the risk of e coli, listeria, etc.)”: I’ve never seen anyone refuse to serve raw veggies to a pregnant woman anyway, but I’d like to point out that what people are afraid of is actually toxoplasmosis, not listeria or e-coli. In France they routinely test for toxoplasmosis early in the first trimester, and it is indeed reasonable for those who are not immunized not to eat raw veggies unless they know for a fact they have been properly washed. You can’t be sure of how thoroughly your veggies have been washed when you eat out.
Dragon commented on Nov 04 11 at 1:08 pmWell I think the waitress was in the right. I would have an issue giving alcohol to a pregnant woman. Feel free to go somewhere else and drink, but don’t make me feel cornered into giving “minors” alcohol.
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