With my first child, we did the family bed from a very early age. The problem I found was that I couldn’t sleep well when the baby was in our bed. (I can’t sleep well when the baby is in a bassinette next to our bed, but at least I didn’t worry about suffocating him. Once he got used to the family bed, it was very difficult to get him into a crib. I tried at when he was 21 months old and it bombed. By the time he was finally out of my bed, he was about 6. For my next two kids, I brought them in bed for a few weeks, but tried to get them used to their cribs early on. They both sleep well and love their cribs. I tend to nurse my kids into their toddler years, so having them out of my bed is crucial or else I’d be nursing all night, too.

It has been great for my family. We are among those who didn’t set out to co-sleep, but it ended up being the only way we could all get some rest. My son will be two next week, and as a working Mom who misses out on 8 hours of time with him every day, I cherish the time I spend with him at night. We both feel more secure and it has contributed to our ability to continue nursing. I do have to set some rules about nursing in bed or, like another commenter said, we would be nursing all night long. I nurse him to sleep when he first goes down, and again at around 4 a.m. because he always without fail wakes up at that time, but that’s it.

My fiancé does end up on the couch sometimes, but neither of us mind. We both know our son will only be little for a short time and eventually he will want to sleep in his own bed. I personally slept with my parents until I was 5 and off and on after that, so I’m fine with it. It’s not for everyone, but I’m glad I didn’t let the naysayers convince me it wasn’t for me.

My kids are never allowed in my bed. The end. Let me just add that my children all stay in their beds and sleep beautifully, as do I. I just don’t get co-sleeping AT ALL. I’m with these kids all day long; don’t I deserve some kid-free time?

One of my kids is in our bed most nights. They fall asleep in their beds and we get grown up time (including *wink, wink* time). The sometime between midnight and 4 am little feet pad in to our room and say “mommy, I want to sleep with you” or loud voices scream from a crib asking for mommy. Whoever gets there first gets to sleep with mommy in the big bed. Whoever gets there second, gets daddy in the guest bed. I just wish we’d bought a king so there was room for all four in one bed. I just doesn’t bother me. I figure any caveman toddler who willingly slept alone in the cold dark side of the cave was eaten by a bear, so evolution must be on the side of co-sleeping. Telling tiny little people that they need to sleep alone just seems unnatural.

I find Dr. Sears’ idea that “nighttime is a scary time for little people” ridiculous. I’ve never gotten the impression my baby is scared of the dark or of it being night time. At almost 5 months old, he’s been putting himself to sleep in his crib in his room without crying for almost three weeks. In our co-sleeper he seemed too excited by us and no one was getting great sleep. I just tried the crib one night and expected he’d be up a lot, so I slept on the floor. The next night I didn’t because it seemed like it didn’t matter I was there. Since he’s been in his crib he goes right back to sleep after eating and stays asleep much longer. When my baby was co-sleeping it wasn’t so he wouldn’t be afraid either. It was so we didn’t have to get up out of bed and be awake longer. Am I wrong that a lot of people do it for that reason? Or because the parents actually really like to sleep with their baby? I think that’s great and parents should do whatever feels right to them with their baby, but to infer that having the baby in a crib on their own at night is putting them in a situation in which they will feel scared or in danger…my happy sleeping baby disproves that to me.

We never did cosleeping in our house. I am a very deep sleeper, and I would be terrified of smothering a baby. Our oldest daughter could never have coslept, as she never ever slept if my husband or I were i the room. If mom and dad were around it was playtime, and if playtime lasted too long she became overtired and frantic. Nothing, and I mean nothing, would settle her down. The new baby slept great in her crib from day one. If we ever had a baby that seemed to sleep better with us I may have tried one of those co-sleeper bed thingies, but honestly I’m thankful that my girls seemed to prefer their own rooms.

I couldn’t co sleep, I couldn’t fall asleep worrying that my Husband(a very heavy sleeper) would roll over on the baby. Plus I’m a light sleeper and can’t have anyone touching me while I’m asleep. My son inherited that from me and at two will not sleep unless he is alone with the lights out. And anyway night time is mommy and daddy special time :)

I thought you had a boy, anon? You said “him” in the airplane post, no?

IME, it’s pretty much the only way to go if you’re breastfeeding. If I’d had to get up and go to another room, then nursing sitting up and awake several times a night, I’d have been a miserable wreck. Our youngest slept with us until he was almost 4, then went straight to his own twin. I enjoyed snuggling in bed with all my kids.

My son does great in his crib, and when he wakes to nurse my hubby goes and gets him and he nurses while we doze for about an hour. But actual sleep never happens if he’s in there…I can’t fall asleep, and he’s way too grabby on me to get some good sleep. But I would have done it if we had to to get some sleep.

It might have worked if we had a bigger bed or a less thrashy-sleeping infant. It worked for about two months, then our little munchkin slept in the portacrib within arms reach of my side of the bed for about six months past that becuase there was not enough room in bed for us and the thrashing child (I came to work one day with a black eye given to me by my then two month old!). He moved into a crib in his own room after that (that time frame – about 8 months of age – is when he decided that he didn’t really need to nurse in the middle of the night. We waited to move him because like LindaLou, I was not keen on the get-up-get-the-babe-come-back-nurse-go-back-put-down dance) and currently, its a rarity if he winds up in our bed at all for sleep. I think there was one nightmare night (well, it definitely was a lousy night of sleep for all, but I think the little one was having a nightmare or something) fairly recently, but that’s it.

Truly, whatever gets the most sleep for the most members of the family is what is best for the family. My beef with these comments is that co-sleeping with a baby does NOT equal a toddler who will refuse to sleep in their own bed; this is a matter of parenting, temperament, and development.

At our house, we have two queen beds and two twin beds dispersed in three different rooms, as well as a toddler mattress that is easily moved. We can all easily sleep in whatever arrangement is best, depending on the age of a the child, sicknesses, privacy for mom and dad, etc. Sometimes parents get SO uptight about “family bed” vs. “alone in crib” and forget that there is a great chasm between those that changes with needs of individuals in a family.