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Strollerderby
Baby Names for The Upper Crust
Do you allow your children to play with plastic toys? Have they seen a Disney movie or even own toys or clothing emblazoned with Sleeping Beauty or Lightning McQueen? Do you push — gasp — a Graco stroller?
Then you are not the target market for this list by Pamela Redmond Satran, the self-styled “baby name expert” who runs nameberry.com. recently on the Daily Beast, she shared her The Elite’s Top 50 Baby Names.
Mock though I do, I admit her description of an elite’s baby-naming process sounds a lot like mine:
Looking for the perfect name for your firstborn, you practically earn a degree in actuarial science studying the Social Security most popular names list. Of course you wouldn’t choose a ubiquitous name like Emily or Jacob, but you’re also determined to suss out those names that are rising too fast through the ranks: Lila and Luca, Peyton and Pax.
No, what you want is a name as classy as a sterling teaspoon, as cool as vintage Balenciaga, as hard to locate as a wood-framed cottage in Manhattan—yet just as desirable.
Sounds disturbingly familiar, although mine stemmed from spending 20-odd years of schooling always being Amy K. or Not That Amy, The Other Amy rather than a desire to flaunt elite status (which would be hilariously inappropriate anyway).
Satran has worked out a formula adding or subtracting points to the top 25 names searched on her site. The more points, the higher the name ranks among elite parents. These sound about right based on the people I know, although I’d quibble with Olivia still being an “elite” name. Personally, it’s always been a favorite but got knocked off my list when over the space of a few years, it went from being the name of the adorable little girl from whose parents we bought our house to the name of the daughter of the couple we knew who were most likely to end up on a daytime talk show (and not a nice one like Oprah, either).
She makes an interesting point — elites are almost opposite the general population when it comes to boy’s and girl’s names. Mainstream America tends to stick with solid, classic names for boys and fanciful ones for girls. Elites choose names with softer sounds and vowels for their boys (Asher, Leo) and often, more classic names like Jane and Caroline for girls.
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9 Comments
Christine598 commented on Mar 18 10 at 7:14 pmAugh, I can’t believe her list — ALL names I just had to move from my “love this name, but too weird?” column on the ‘baby names’ word document I’ve been keeping for like 10 years, to the “probably too common” column!!!! Wtf, NOT A SNOWFLAKE! The same thing happened when I read Freakonomics. :(
It seems the only possible way to get ahead of this curve would be to give them names that sound at the time of birth as *lame* and frumpy as possible, as they’re probably the next vanguard (like the “old lady” and “old man” names of 10 years ago)… I also say this because dog names at the dog park are an excellent indicator of where baby names are going next — people try out edgy names first on their dogs, and they hit children several years later. And at the dog parks of Silverlake, LA and the Upper West Side, NYC – the 2 places I’ve lived in the past year I’ve had my dog – the new thing is hipster dogs cropping up with “lame”-sounding names from the 1950s, 60s, and 70s. I’ve met dogs named Carol, Bill, Jeff, Dan, and Brenda. So that’s my prediction — the recent NYT article about an ill little boy and his dog in which the CHILD was named Milo and the DOG was named Chad being a perfect example of this! So that’s my prediction — Don’t forget, the baby-boomers are all going to have grandchild-namesakes before you know it, so naming the baby after grandma could mean a slew of Peggys, Lindas, Jans, and Sues!
Black Sheep commented on Mar 18 10 at 7:56 pmCoDisagree with Sophia and Ava. Nice names, but they are so in that they are out.
PlumbLucky commented on Mar 19 10 at 7:30 amI wonder if we know the same little Olivia ;-). Same comment applies to her parents (“Springer much?”)
Names are so much more difficult to chose the second time around. Our son? Easy peasy. We had that wittled down pretty quick. Now? Hah!
Noah Smith commented on Mar 19 10 at 12:20 pmMaybe I’m just exhausted from the way politicians abuse the words “elite” or “elitist,” but I’m bothered by the whole idea that wanting your child not to be, as you said “The Other Amy” is an elitist desire. We have twins on the way, which adds several new wrinkles to the naming dilemma (is it good or bad to have your twins names start with the name letter? etc.)
Intrigued to see Finn mentioned atop that article. This was a name we were considering until TWO of my cousins (one on each side) named their first borns variations on it (Finnegan and Phineas). Sigh. Back to the drawing board.
mooooma commented on Mar 19 10 at 3:27 pmI have an Ava and a Sophie….not cuz they’re the in names…Ava I have loved since forever, and my great grandma’s middle name was Sophie…
alison commented on Mar 20 10 at 12:36 amThese top names are the ones frequently searched on her site, right? How does she insure that only the most elite of parents find their way to her site to search names? I mean, if anybody can search, how elite are these names? In fact, couldn’t we use the general rule of thumb that people busy worrying about whether their children have elite sounding names probably aren’t members of the elite, they are just wannabes? Now, had she combed the enrollment lists of every exclusive private preschool in NYC, I would be more inclined to believe she has some insight into the naming practices of the elite.
tlr commented on Mar 22 10 at 10:32 amMy daughter’s name made it onto the “elite” list. I had no idea! haha! The section in “Freakonomics” where they talk about names is really interesting. They suggest that names start at the high end of the socio economic scale and make their way down through the ranks over time… and as they get down to the lower socio economic group, people who want to be different just use different spellings of the same names. My name, Tiffanie, was used as an example of a name that indicated lack of wealth and education on the part of the parents. I have to say, it’s pretty accurate in my case. I was raised by two people who didn’t even graduate high school and our income was well below the poverty line. I find it all very fascinating!
NoHo Mom commented on Mar 22 10 at 5:23 pmWell, just name your kid after a character on ‘Buffy the Vampire Slayer’, like I did, and you’ll be fine.
jenny tries too hard commented on Mar 24 10 at 5:57 pmor just hand over the naming of your children to your gay brother, like I did.
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