babble » blogs » Strollerderby
Strollerderby
U.K. Couple Endures Decades of IVF
Babies conceived via IVF are hardly news. Going back for treatments and procedures into a third decade like Monica and Neil Ward, however, certainly catches one’s attention.
At long last, the British couple are the stunned and elated parents of twin sons, following a quarter of a century of fertility treatments. Twenty-five years! And how does daddy Neil describe it?
A living hell.
The Wards drained themselves emotionally and financially — $200,000 in all — in repeated attempts to get and stay pregnant.
In 1986, Monica underwent her first attempt a assisted reproduction. After that failed, the couple waited nearly a year and then tried again. The pattern continued over the years. And it was hard for both of them.
From the NY Daily News:
“My wife is desperate for children and if you love a person that much you have to say yes no matter what the consequences.”
“Every time it didn’t work it took 10 months to get over it and it was like a living hell for both of us.”
The two are ecstatic, of course. The boys were born Dec. 29 and mom, dad and babes are doing fine.
Who couldn’t be happy for the couple and the boys? At the same time, 25 years of “living” hell, I’m impressed that their marriage stayed together through it all.
What do you think? Crazy or understandable?
More Posts
Haiti Disaster Ignites Breast vs. Formula Debate
Creator of Famous (and Barely Edible) Childhood Treat Dies
FDA Sends More Mixed Messages on BPA
No. 1 in C-Sections in the World
Vintage Ad Reminds Us Girls Used to Just Be Kids
‘Baby Einstein’ Creator Sues to Prove TV Not Bad for Kids
Mozart Connected to Baby Weight Gain
Photo: telegraph.co.uk
Go Back To Strollerderby
11 Comments
[...] or within a certain timeframe. When I say extreme measures I’m talking about couples like this one in the UK who endured 25 years of “living hell” to have biological children. [...]
I Don’t Understand This — Hoping to Adopt commented on Jan 21 10 at 7:03 am[...] U.K. Couple Endures Decades of IVF [...]
Woman Drives 3 Hours in Labor So Husband Can Attend Birth | Strollerderby commented on Jan 21 10 at 4:08 pmSara commented on Jan 20 10 at 4:15 pmIs there some reason they couldn’t adopt?
Ladybug commented on Jan 20 10 at 5:09 pmAdoption isn’t necessarily easy or right for everyone. Not sure what the rules are in the UK, but it tends to take longer there than it does here in the US. I am glad the IVF finally worked for them.
Lucky commented on Jan 20 10 at 5:15 pmCrazy. But understandable.
Robyn commented on Jan 20 10 at 6:51 pmI’m with Sara. 25 years of hell to have a biological child? I certainly don’t understand that.
Lalalala commented on Jan 20 10 at 9:59 pmI couldn’t do it. We quit trying assisted reproduction after 2 years. Adoption is NOT the default option if a person can’t have bio children. There are quite a number of criteria that make adoption impossible for many infertiles even if they are considering it as a way to grow their family.
Knowing when enough is enough is a deeply personal decision.
If you have children and didn’t have to try very hard to do it, then you will never understand.
MJ commented on Jan 21 10 at 2:09 pmDoesn’t seem like a healthy obsession at all to me.
leahsmom commented on Jan 21 10 at 4:22 pmIf my partner was so obsessed with one issue and spent over $200,000 on it with no success, I’d probably seek counseling – not feel forced to agree, “no matter what the consequences.” To me, this sounds sad and scary. There are many ways to parent and be involved with children – all this time and money and angst on being pregnant has nothing to do with parenting.
Belle commented on Jan 22 10 at 1:20 pmAdoption in the UK- of children in foster care, at least- does not take as long as the same process in America.
But it’s true, adoption is not the auto fix for infertile couples. We wouldn’t want a child to go to a family where they thought of the child as a last choice. Even so, I can’t imagine TWENTY-FIVE years. It sounds crazy, to me.
Julia commented on Feb 06 10 at 3:43 amThere are 18 million orphaned children in this world who need a mommy and daddy. These people didn’t want a child. They wanted to be pregnant and their egos wanted the child to come from their gene pool. Even if it takes a long time (2-3 years), that’s a lot less than 25 years.
Add your take:
Note: Babble is a supportive, diverse community. We encourage a range of opinions,
but any unduly hostile comments will be removed.
Comments are delayed up to 15 minutes
Joslyn Gray 
Amber Doty 
Julianna Miner 
Monica Bielanko 
Sierra Black 
Meredith Carroll 
Carolyn Castiglia 
Sunny Chanel 
Madeline Holler 
Wendy Michaels 
Rebecca Odes 
Danielle Smith 
Danielle Sullivan 
Katherine Stone 
The Walt Disney Company supports Babble as a platform dedicated to honest, engaged, informed, intelligent and open conversation about parenting. However, the opinions expressed on this site are those of individual parents/writers and do not reflect the views of Disney. In addition, content provided on this site is for entertainment or informational purposes only and should not be construed as medical advice, diagnosis, treatment, or safety advice.
11