babble » blogs » Strollerderby
Strollerderby
5 Reasons the Duggars are Sex Machines (?)
Okay, so there’s a headline that might get your attention. Momlogic put up this article in which they really want to convince you that Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar are FREAKS (you know, in the realm of sex). It would seem the several hundred children the Duggars produced at least imply they have a passing interest in sex. And you could end it right there. But Momlogic throws down 5 whole reasons we should think about how much the Duggars like doin’ it. Like a lot. All the time. Unabashedly. And with their kids’ knowledge.
Huh?
So here are those reasons, as promised and now delivered.
Momlogic’s Top 5 Duggar Sex “Facts”
1) Michelle Duggar can get her groove on.
When you’ve got 18 people calling you Mom, focusing on sex can be a challenge. To get in the mood, does Michelle Duggar work herself into a catatonic state? Is that catatonic state called “sleep”?
2) The Duggars love pregnant sex.
How do we know? Well, the average gap between Duggar pregnancies is 18 months. Guess Mr. Duggar doesn’t mind getting sprayed with breast milk every time he touches his wife’s breasts/feeding stations during foreplay. Hope he’s not lactose intolerant!
3) Duggar sex is quiet sex.
Eighteen kids equals 36 ears — all listening. Michelle’s probably not screaming out Jim Bob’s name during orgasm — otherwise 18 lights instantly go on — and the Duggar electric bill skyrockets.
4) Duggar sex is at night.
You can bet the Duggars aren’t grabbing any “afternoon delight” with 18 kids milling around the house asking for help with homework, to kiss a boo-boo, or who simply need to “latch on” to Mom. Nope, no quickies in the kitchen for the Duggars. The only time they can have sex is under the covers — under the cover of darkness.
5) Duggar kids know where babies come from.
They come from the bedroom. Every time Ma and Pa Duggar get behind closed doors, odds are you get a new sibling.
There now, the Duggar sex freak conspiracy is blown open wide. The Duggars are sexual folks (in so much as they like it).
And what have we learned? Well, two or three of those reasons are the same reason, which is the Duggar kids are abundantly aware that their parents are doing it and will probably continue to do so for some time. Also the Duggars may or may not incorporate breast milk into foreplay (yikes) and they probably don’t get freaky in spontaneous place like the kitchen or the “Rumpus Room” because of, you know, the three hundred kids scurrying everywhere.
In the end, I think this list is kind of funny, frightening and obvious. But what really disturbs me of this picture they used of Jim Bob and Michelle.
I’m glad they’re married, because otherwise I’d feel obligated yell “Stranger Danger” because I think that scary man is about to devour someone’s mommy.
EMBIGGEN!
Again!
I need an adult!!!
Source: Momlogic
More:
Dad Trying to Lactate So He Can Breastfeed Child
Drunken 12-Year-Old Steals Car, Crashes 3 Times Before Stopped
World’s Ugliest (Animal) Babies
Giant Bleeding Child’s Head Warns N. Zealanders to Drive Safer
15 Breast-Feeding Myths Explained
CDC Pushing Circumcision on All Baby Boys?!
Most Offensive Book Title You’ll See All Day
Most Disgusting PSA Ever
Parents Brawl over Which Gang Their Toddler Should Join
Go Back To Strollerderby
12 Comments
Laundry & Children commented on Sep 14 09 at 10:27 amReally? No. Really?
GP commented on Sep 14 09 at 1:11 pmClosing eyes. Plugging ears. “la la la la la la la la la”
Mistress_Scorpio commented on Sep 14 09 at 5:43 pmJim Bob is all “I’ma tap that later tonight.”
Lisa commented on Sep 14 09 at 8:26 pmThat’s not funny. It’s just disturbing
Autumn commented on Dec 05 09 at 7:31 pmI think this article is very disrespectful. they’re a good family
Katie commented on Dec 18 09 at 8:08 pmPLEASE leave them alone. Why is everyone bashing this family? From what I’ve seen they take better care of their 19 children that most families can of 2 0r 3. They don’t ask anyone for anything, why is everyone so worried about how many children they choose to have. LEAVE THEM ALONE AND WORRY ABOUT YOUR OWN BUSINESS!!!! God Bless You Duggar family!
emmy commented on Aug 07 10 at 2:40 pmthe vagina is not a gum ball mashine
Sarah commented on Dec 06 10 at 1:54 pmI think this is one of the most disrespectful things that I have read on Babble. Quite a shame really.
Lisa Lawrence commented on Jan 28 11 at 3:58 pmJim Bob is all “I’ma tap that later tonight.”
Jim Bob is all “I’ma tap that later tonight.” OMG! I read this comment by mistress_scorpio and died laughing! That was hilarious :)
Amy commented on May 31 11 at 11:29 amWhat a poorly written, crass article…
Erin commented on Nov 09 11 at 1:15 amThis is disrespectful and plain mean on so many levels. The reason they have so many children is because they love each other and trust God with their reproduction. Most married couples have sex at least once a month or so… how does that make them “sex machines?” People that make comments like that about the duggars are just hateful. I would rather have 100000 duggar kids in the world than selfish, lazy kids that are common in today’s world. The duggars are a blessing!
~Jesus loves you
Nancy Jamba commented on Apr 10 12 at 12:21 pmBabble or myself may not agree that having a family that large is something any of us would like to do. But the way they are talked about in this article is disrespectful,disgusting,ignorant and mean! Many people have decided to trust in God to guide their lives, in every way. Just because the writer and others don’t doesn’t mean the Duggars are wrong to do so. To say “good thing Jim Bob is lactose tolerant” is vile and ignorant. I don’t believe that breast milk has enough lactose to be an issue (if any). And to speak of his wife’s breasts in that way is just WRONG!!. The writer of trash then continues this rant by making a very poor and terrible fake PSA poster of Jim Bob , continuing her vulgarity in bold capital letters. Why the personal attacks?? At least they are raising children who all know or will know as they grow up, how to take care of themselves and others. They don’t sit around doing nothing, whining that they don’t have anything to do. If they do, they are given chores to do. They will all know how to be productive (not in your wise crack sense) and helpful individuals at home and in their community. This article was based on a snippets of the show. Watch the series, Then write about something you really know about.
Add your take:
Note: Babble is a supportive, diverse community. We encourage a range of opinions,
but any unduly hostile comments will be removed.
Comments are delayed up to 15 minutes
Lori Garcia 
Joslyn Gray 
Amber Doty 
Julianna Miner 
Monica Bielanko 
Sierra Black 
Meredith Carroll 
Carolyn Castiglia 
Sunny Chanel 
Madeline Holler 
Rebecca Odes 
Danielle Smith 
Danielle Sullivan 
Katherine Stone 
The Walt Disney Company supports Babble as a platform dedicated to honest, engaged, informed, intelligent and open conversation about parenting. However, the opinions expressed on this site are those of individual parents/writers and do not reflect the views of Disney. In addition, content provided on this site is for entertainment or informational purposes only and should not be construed as medical advice, diagnosis, treatment, or safety advice.
12