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Strollerderby
Dad Grows Pot to Be a “Cool” Parent
In middle school and high school, I used to feel secretly sorry for the kids who were known for having “cool” parents. Everyone else seemed to think that having a dad pull up outside the school building blasting Eminem, or a mom who hung out and chatted about boys with her daughters’ friends was something to be envied.
But I always noticed a subtle desperation in the parents’ need to fit in, and assumed it must have been, consciously or not, exhausting for the kids to relate to their parents as friends. Peer-to-peer relationships require a pretty even give-and-take, which was never something I wanted with my parents: I was grateful that our relationship was predicated on their caring for me.
It’s true that seeing teens and preteens who are completely open with their parents is refreshing, and airing on the side of “cool” is definitely better than airing on the side of neglectful. But I also noticed that kids with cool parents were usually preoccupied with being cool themselves, far more focused on their social lives than their schoolwork.
This was almost certainly the case for a Utah teenager who was growing marijuana with his father in their basement. Upon being charged with child endangerment and drug possession, the 41-year-old father said he was just trying to be a “cool dad.”
I’m certainly no fan of using government resources to prosecute marijuana possession, but it’s kind of hard not to see the error of this father’s way. I’d just much rather see him be taught by a counselor that drugs are not the way to be close with his kids than have him face prosecution.
It may seem cool to have fewer rules than all your friends when you’re 15, but ultimately kids need and want clear boundaries. What happens when you get to college and your mom wants to party with your friends? How can you grow out of irresponsible habits—such as being a pothead—if your parents are still ensconced in them?
Photo: marijuanaseedbanks.com
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4 Comments
Whoa commented on Jun 03 09 at 9:16 pmDid you just use “air” instead of “err?” Are you serious? Eeek!
Marj commented on Jun 03 09 at 9:37 pmerring not airing.
Also, I agree with you. The cool parent is generally just more embarrassing to a teen than the parent parent. I want my kids to be able to come & talk to me about anything. I do not want them to treat me like a peer. I am a grown-up, not a teen.
GP commented on Jun 04 09 at 3:08 pmthat would be “erring” on the side of being cool…
Dawn commented on Oct 30 09 at 12:22 amUm, that Dad was an idiot but you are wrong. I always feel sorry for the kids with uber-strict or helicoptering parents.
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