Posted by
joslyngray on January 27th, 2012 at 12:15 pm
Posted by
sunnychanel on January 26th, 2012 at 11:30 pm

Which country's alleged parenting technique best describes your style?
I don’t think my mother-in-law would disagree that my husband comes from a highly anxious people. In their eyes, if the worst can happen, it probably will.
I grew up largely on my own. My single mom would regularly come home from long shifts at work to find my brothers and I had positioned the trampoline so we could jump onto it from the roof of the house. She never seemed overly concerned about it, and we all survived, although there was that one time somebody took a dart to the eyeball …
Most recently, Serge and I argued over the hardwood staircase in our new home. He doesn’t think we should let our 3-year-old go up and down it alone. I argue that if we constantly carry her or hold her hand we’re making it even more unsafe because she’ll never learn how to safely negotiate the steps on her own. Still, he’s determined to “carpet the staircase.” Sigh. He also wants to get a new TV stand so that our 1-year-old will stop touching the buttons on the DVD player. Me? I think we need to teach Henry not to touch the buttons instead of removing them from temptation. Isn’t that the only way he’ll learn?
Our parental disagreements of this nature are what made this article on the Huffington Post catch my eye. It’s called French Parents: Vive La Difference? In it Debra Ollivier talks about how, in France, they don’t pander to children. Ollivier’s first child was born in Paris. She writes about how she baby-proofed her apartment so much so that her French neighbor said the place looked like a “psych ward.”
Ollivier uses the anecdote to demonstrate how the French parent differently from Americans and why it quite possibly might be the way to go. I liked this idea. Basically, according to Ollivier’s theory, I’m France and Serge (who is, ironically, half-French) is America.
Ollivier cites her friend, expat Pamela Druckerman, who writes in her upcoming book Bringing Up Bebe that “My French friends didn’t have to hurriedly end phone calls because their kids were shouting for something … They were, overall, just more relaxed. It was a cumulative effect, which led to a ‘hang on, maybe they’re onto something,’ So I decided to look into it.”
What both women, and many other expatriates living in France, apparently discovered is that “where childhood trumps adulthood in the States, the opposite is largely true in France.” Continue reading »
Posted by
wendym on January 26th, 2012 at 4:09 pm
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