Good for you!
It should be up to you how you live your life and raise your kids, and it seems like you’re doing a damn good job!

If we weren’t in the military (Reserves), we couldn’t afford health insurance and our household income is over 100k a year. Health insurance isn’t affordable even to the middle income any more. If we had to pay regularly for our health insurance, we would pay more than our mortgage or rent (we own in Oregon; rent in California). My husband is finishing up his Ph.D and without that security we might not have had the secure job he has that allows me to stay home for a few years with our toddler. While the college he works for would provide group health insurance for our family, it’s still $800 for my son and I to be added on and it has a high deductible. It’s TriCare (military) that ensures we’re insured.

You shouldn’t have to defend something that is not your fault and beyond your control (the cost and availability of health insurance). We too are being saved by the grace of Medicaid. I lost my job a few years ago when I was laid off through no fault of my own and like millions of Americans had difficulty finding a job for 2 years. My husband has his own business which although he works very hard at it (15 hour days/6 days a week) in this economy he hasn’t turned a profit and he can’t get business health insurance because he’s the only employee (most plans require at least 3 employees other than the owner). We lost our home to foreclosure and nearly were going to be split apart with me having to live at my mom’s house with our son and my husband living at his business. Just in the nick of time, I was able to land a temporary job (no health insurance benefits available) which pays quite well. I was surprised to find out we would be allowed to stay on our health insurance through Medicaid for an additional year. Thank goodness we are because I found out I’m pregnant with #2 which is a complete surprise because we were trying not to! I had major medical complications with my first pregnancy and now I’m considered high risk and will required a repeat c-section. Private health insurance which covers maternity care is extremely expensive and what’s worse is I got turned down for all the plans I applied for because of my health history. The high risk program available through the state cost well over $1500 a month and only paid for me! Who can really afford that?? There are lots of reasons why health insurance is unaffordable and unavailable to the average American. Instead of wasting our energy on getting angry at people who don’t have insurance, let’s refocus and take the time to write insurance companies and our government to let them know that we believe comprehensive health insurance (including birth control, maternity care and prescription coverage) should be available and affordable to all no matter what.

if you dont know someones WHOLE situation then dont judge. its not your job to judge people anyways. its Gods. people need to keep their mouth shut and worry about their own family!

I understand people need to do what they have to, and an education is a good reason to use the assistance, I mean I know of people who use and abuse the system and make no effort to better their lives because the govt. will foot the bill on everything for them because they know just what to say to get what they want. If a family is trying to make their situation better and have swallowed down their pride to go to social services and go through the demeaning and judgmental process of applying then they probably really need the help and you shouldn’t judge them. Obviously her husband worked and payed taxes too so she has every right to use the programs there to help her family. Just be glad if you don’t need the help, but don’t slander those who need it.

My husband is working and going to school too. And we have a two month old, who’s covered by medicaid. He pays taxes (like all those with jobs) and when he graduates, we’ll be able to have private insurance and guess what, keep paying taxes. How’s that abusing the system?

Nicole, stop being so judgmental. You “used” the system too, you don’t get to judge people who are bettering themselves so that as soon as possible, they can do it on their own.

THANK YOU. I am one of those scary conservatives, but the jerkoffs who say, “Can’t afford kids? Don’t have them!” have NO FREAKING IDEA about real life. That’s all I will say about the matter.

Amen! I thought the same things about miss judgy pants when I read that comment on your last article.

As far as “Heidi” is concerned, she would be paying those tax dollars anyways. The whole point of having a govt. is that people like Heidi don’t get to decide who does and who doesn’t “deserve” (just because everyone can judge anyone based on whatever criteria they want doesn’t make it right or accurate). I would much rather our tax dollars go to someone trying to better their life and society as a whole (by going to grad school) than to someone willing to live on welfare their entire life. Perhaps Heidi doesn’t want to go to grad school or better her life through it– fine, but don’t rain on someone else’s calling.

The medical insurance system in our country is messed up. Let’s just face it and move on. In agreement with “Josie” the out of pocket cash cost really is LESS than a copay! Don’t believe me? Go get a sonogram! Ask what the cash price is and see how it compares to the copay with insurance! THAT’S messed up.

Can I hug you right now, Casey? I mean, what if you have great insurance when you have your kids and then your job eliminates the health insurance plan? Does Judge-y McJudgerpants think we should all abandon our children then? It’s completely ridiculous. And yes, it is VERY often more affordable to pay out of pocket for doctor’s visits than to pay for full coverage insurance, especially if your family is healthy. So many people simply haven’t sat down with a calculator and figured that out. Love your piece!

Casey, did you or did you not have a message in your inbox today about an inheritance of a million GBP? I know you promised me some of it, but you could totally use your share for insurance.

I choose to pay my own medical bills when incurred, and NOT feed the pig that is the insurance industry. Selfish, or fiscally responsible? Go get ‘em, Casey.

What all the Heidi’s and Miss Judgy Pants are missing is that welfare is for Americans that need it. There is a HUGE difference between using it when you need it because you are tied up with school or just in a rough patch, and those that just rely on it and never trying to do a thing to contribute. If we’re all putting $ into the pot with our tax dollars as Americans, we should have the right to it when we need it. That is what it’s SUPPOSED to be there for. We had our own insurance with my first child and it was great. My second pregnancy was a total surprise (on birth control) and my husband was working his butt off but it was 100% commission, so we were barely making ends meet. It was a huge blessing that we qualified for Medicaid. My husband and I have always worked, btw…and always pay our taxes. Crying about “my tax dollars” just sounds petty and like others said, I’m happy if anything I’m contributing is giving back to others, as I’ve been given.

I was at my job for 10 years and at 4 months into a high risk pregnancy I as “let go’ during a re-organizations. Lawyers got involved and a severance was negotiated, but after a period of time we are paying $1428/month for COBRA insurance. My husband is from the Netherlands and if we don’t find employment with health insurance by the end of the year we will be moving to the EU where we won’t carry this stress. Some of you may say “but you pay it in taxes”, which is true, but the tax bill is a hell of alot less than we would pay in COBRA or for catastrophic insurance. I will hate to leave all my family and friends but the state of healthcare in the US is criminal.

After 2 years we finally have health insurance again. My husband was blessed enough to get a job which pays for all of it. My daughter is 2 1/2 and we were covered when I was pregnant and for her birth. But my teaching position was cut b/c of numbers while I was on maternity leave. My husband was halfway through his doctorate program to become a chiropractor. I was unable to find another position so we went on assistance until he finished school. Our only other choice was to abandon his program which we already owed $100,000 in student loans. That didn’t make sense to us so we took what assistance was available and lived off student loans and savings. That might piss some people off but it was the right choice for our situation. Thank goodness he found a job that pays for our health insurance. There is no way we can afford to pay more for insurance than our rent. Something needs to change in this country.

Heidi should think through her “judgy” comments a bit more before making them. She is upset at people for using government assistance to better their lives through education because those individuals are taking her tax dollars–GASP. Those individuals need to use Heidi’s tax dollars for approximately 1 to 4 years of their lives. In return, those individuals get to pay taxes on a greater income at likely a greater tax rate for 1 to 4 decades of their lives.

So, which is option is more beneficial to Americans–the long term strategy of bettering people’s lives, or the short term strategy of preserving Heidi’s tax dollars while ensuring that people remain “in their place” economically speaking? More people with higher education paying significantly more in taxes for several decades, or preserving Heidi’s tax dollars causing the government to receive significantly less money in taxes over several decades–and likely increasing the need for the government to increase Heidi’s tax rate? People gaining the ability to provide for their families to help ensure that future government aid is not necessary, or people left to struggle to meet the needs of their families because higher paying jobs are outside their reach? More qualified people in America capable of making inventions and innovations as a result of their higher education to, hopefully, stabilize and grow the economy, or fewer people with the necessary qualifications to keep America at the forefront of the world’s economy? I think the answer is obvious; however, I think it is ultimately more important for Heidi, and many other people with the same short sighted mindset, to feel like she is somehow better than everyone else because she hasn’t needed to use government aid–well, except for that one time, and then there was that other time.

In my opinion, this is exactly where this assistance should be going, to people who are trying to making good decisions for their family, to better their future. What about the people who are just sitting on their butts, doing nothing and have no intentions on doing anything. Id much rather be paying for Casey’s family than the other.

I recognize how fortunate I am that I have always had health insurance. I was covered by my parents through college. Since then, I’ve always had a job that included coverage. I can still afford the family coverage offered by our employers. I also recognize that, should something truly catastrophic happen, I will have more access to better options. I can’t tell you how grateful I am that I have not tapped those options. I believe there is something inherently wrong with the fact that I would have more options to save my child if he were faced with a terminal diagnosis than children without coverage.

Casey, I think you used those social services for their exact, intended purpose. It drives me crazy to see those services abused. My step sister in law and her family could write a book on how to screw the real American tax payer. She is 40+ with 2 kids and has never paid taxes, health services, rent, etc. I am pretty sure she thinks we are crazy for working.

If anyone has ever seen the true cost for battling a catastrophic illness or injury then they have to know that insurance or social services, they were subsidized. If your medical costs run into the millions then you are subsidized. The difference that I see is whether you are subsidized by other insurance premiums or taxes.

I’m glad that you found a method that works for your family, Casey. I’m truly not saying this to judge, but only in empathy. I’d find it hard to live with the risk. Best wishes for health and happiness to you all.

here here Casey!!

I 100% understand the negative sentiment this person left on your wall, but maybe he/she didn’t articulate it so well. I work outside the home almost 40 hours a week to bring home benefits like life, health and retirement. I don’t want to. I hate it. But my husband’s job does not offer these things. So I had a choice 1) stay at home with kids and live off assistance, or 2) work and let the far less fortunate utilize assistance. I am able bodied, and I don’t want to drain an already depleted welfare system. If I lost my job tomorrow, we would definitely seek social aid. But not before we attempted to make do on our own. Isn’t that the American way?

It is a hard topic. My 3 month old was born with cataracts and in the 3 months he’d been alive, we’d have racked up over $25,000 in bills without insurance. It has still cost us several thousand with insurance. If we hadn’t found the problem (at his one month well check the pediatrician noticed it in his 2 minute exam) and fixed it, he could have permenantly lost his sight. I was grateful for our insurance which cost us a lot but saved us more. I wish there was a better solution out there. It seems to just be getting worse.

It is a difficult topic, but I do think there is a difference between not being able to afford insurance and choosing not to have insurance. I work, in large part, because my husband is self-employed and doesn’t have health insurance. Sometimes it really stinks, and there are lots of times that I would love to be the one to pick my sons up at school, but I also know that our health is something we have only a bit of control over and having health insurance is critical. Casey, I actually think you are short sighted if you think just because you take care of yourself and your family your health will be ok (coming from someone who has always taken care of herself, did everything “right” during pregnancy and still has a child who has required 3 heart surgeries and has epilepys).

I agree that insurance should be a right and it is one of many problems with healthcare in America, but I also agree with Jennifer.

wow angry people here or self rightous to say the least to thy own self be true what ever that means to each person and whatever works for you it seams the ones not humble here to get help have alot of anger which is a bit odd when this is for the most part an upbeat child blog kuddos to all who love their children regardless how you need to have their needs met attitude is everything in the long run;)

America is only better at producing nukes. America bash other countries all the time but the reality is many of those other countries has much better health coverage for all type of people. I do not give a rat arse if we do or do not have ipods, fat highways, political dramas, luxary items, or high tech craps. I do care if we have affordable health coverage for all type of people. I do have good health insurance coverage through my employer but I always worry about losing it because of how the system works. Five minutes doctors visit cost $200? It’s gotta be animal fvcking kidding.