Had one once for picking a neighbor’s flowers case “Timmy told me to”….Never broke rules again cause a kid told me to……never got spanked again either.

I remember the one time I got spanked. I was 5 or 6, and my dad and mom had taken me to a book binding factory where he was getting some med journals bound. I was running around the factory, no matter how many times he told me “NO!” The reality was, I could have really been hurt by one of the machines. After about the 4th or 5th time telling me “no!”, he gave me a swat across the behind. Hard. I didn’t run around the factory any more. That was the only time I remember being spanked, and I deserved it!!!

My daughter gets spanked, but we’ve exhausted all other means of discipline with her, time out, losing stuff, groundings, pretty much all you can do to a 5yr old that is legal. We’ve even tried a reward/positive reinforcement system. But she doesn’t listen and doesn’t listen. I think discipline is all about knowing your child and knowing what does and doesn’t work with them, but also knowing to not use the same punishment for every crime. For instance, if she’s in trouble for hitting, she gets a time out, not a spanking, etc.

My father came from the mountain hick school of “spare the rod, spoil the child” so I got spanked a lot. And in many cases, it was with a 1″ wide belt that was still warm from being around my father’s waist. I got spanked for not listening to my step mother the first time she called me to dinner, I got spanked for a D on my report card, I got spanked for pushing a kid that was trying to pull me off the swing. I got spanked for giving my father the silent treatment. I got spanked for hitting my sister. In my case I just learned to hide my misdeeds as to avoid being spanked.
All this resulted in me being beyond rebellious, and resentful of my father.
Now I look back and think that excessive spanking is a very useless way to reprimand a child. I understand that if used sparingly, it might be effective discipline for extreme misbehavior. But I do not condone violent acts on children.
My daughter is only 10 months old, and she does do things over and over that get on my nerves, (like pulling out ALL the wet wipes and spreading them around the living room while I am in the kitchen making her bottle). But I doubt I will ever spank her for being mischievous.

I was spanked twice as a kid and remember them both clearly. Like your daughter I was not a repeat offender. My simple take is that if used rarely, it can serve a purpose as you have demonstrated. Don’t feel guilty… think instead of what you’ve taught her and look forward to the day that she’s a parent and you can process this together. :) btw – your picture rocks. It is now my second favorite… the first still being the pic of your uterus before and after kids!!! Great job Casey.

Now that I have a soon to be teenager…I wish I spanked him. Just kidding. I think the day that I heard someone say something about it being more about the parent’s anger than the child’s behavior, I took that to heart. When my kids make me so mad that I want to spank them, I send them to their rooms and tell them to come down when they are ready to talk about it. Some days are harder than others.

My kids have been spanked only once or twice. I think spanking is a tool of last resort, and I’d NEVER use an object. Like you illustrated, if you’ve used everything in your arsenal to no avail, it can be effective. However, it loses its effect with prolonged use and only works inside a limited year range (the older a child is when spanked the more long term problems they have.) I’d also NEVER spank a baby. I saw a man do that in front of me once and I just about lost it. I don’t believe that it works for all children, either.

Perhaps this is my long winded way of saying that brief, limited, specific spanking, after all other options have been exhausted, can be employed effectively but that parents have to be careful that it doesn’t become the default disciplinary route or become an outlet for anger. It’s hopefully such a complicated decision process that it’s no wonder that most of us avoid spanking altogether.

Yes. I even gave my 13 year old a swat a few weeks back. Nothing severe. One swat.

I wasn’t angry, just at the end of a long line of trying everything else and it not working. Before that day I think it had been a year since the last time.

My nearly 9yo is in the same boat. It’s been months since she’s done anything requiring a swat to get her attention.

If I’m angry with them I send them to their rooms until I can calm down. I would never hit my children in anger (I was knocked around pretty good growing up and I don’t want that for my girls).

I don’t use anything but my hand and afterwards when things are calm we discuss what happened and how we both feel about it.

I find that most times just the threat is enough to make them stop doing whatever it is they were doing.

And yes, my girls have each yelled, “DON’T SPANK ME DADDY, I’LL BE GOOD!;” as they were being carried out of church. Neither one was being taken out to be spanked at that time, but they remembered a time before when they had.

I will also admit to “hitting”, biting and pinching my child when they did it to someone else. Not hard, but enough to be uncomfortable. When I asked them if they liked it they always answered no. I looked them in the eye and asked them if they thought that blank liked it. They said no. Next came an apology from me and then an apology to whoever they hurt. It worked.

My kids may behave like heathens at home, but they are well mannered at others.

I do not spank my kids. I think that it would be hypocritical to spank them when I tell them not to hit me or each other.

I did smack my older son once. He was about 2 years old and he was having a tantrum. We were on vacation with some other moms and kids, and it was stressful, and then he full on slapped me in the face – hard. It was almost an automatic response when I smacked his arm. Even thinking about the shocked look on his face at that moment is bringing tears to my eyes right now. I will never smack him again.

I was spanked a lot when i was growing up into my older teen years. Yes when i was younger it was deserved a few times,but the rest was out of anger,spite etc. My adoptive parents were and still are verbally abusive,belittling everything i do or say.
I have always told people that i will not spank because it doesn’t help the kid at all.
NO SPANKING It’s Abuse plain and simple.
Especially people who hit their kid(s) and tell them that hitting is bad.
Rewind and replay what you just said.

You spanked, it worked. I don’t believe in excessive spanking, but I do believe there is a time and a place for it.

this is why everyones kids are such brats anymore! they let them get away with everything! i was spanked as a child and so were all my friends and my husband. and guess what? we respected our parents and we listened to them! gosh people are too easy on their kids these days. im not raising a little brat.