Being Pregnant
Old School: Bill Cosby & Carol Burnett on “Natural Childbirth”
Old school riffing on Lamaze, intellectuals and "Natural Childbirth"
“Carol Burnett described what labor pains feel like, she said, ‘Take your bottom lip. And pull it over your head.’”
This is from Bill Cosby’s 1970′s stand-up bit on “natural childbirth” (video after jump) in which he riffs on the Lamaze classes of yore: “The second pain hit, my wife said, [Incomprehensible Words] and STOOD UP in the stirrups, grabbed my bottom lip and said, ‘I want morphine! … “
I was reminded of this video by a dad in my birth class last night.
We were talking about whether it’s a good idea to speak frankly and openly about the possibility that it’ll hurt like crazy. And about how women can feel disappointed or like failures if the specific *method* taught to them in a childbirth class doesn’t work, as was the case with a good portion of women who were taught the old-fashioned Lamaze breathing techniques. Some loved Lamaze breathing methods and, in fact, I know some women, now in their 70′s, who still use childbirth breathing techniques when confronted with pain (a kidney stone, etc). But others felt they were hung out to dry.
The partner is saying, “BREATHE” and she’s like, give me a break. And some drugs. This is why Lamaze and other childbirth education programs today *tend to* teach many ways to cope in labor so that a woman can use what she needs if and when she needs it. Maybe it’ll be a rhythmic kind of repetition of breath or words or counting (like old school Lamaze). Or maybe it’ll be getting in a tub or tireless foot massaging from a loving partner between contractions. Maybe it will be drugs. Maybe it will be all of these things at different times.
Maybe not everyone agrees with me on this point but I think it’s a fine idea to talk openly about pain. But I do talk about it in a way that also emphasizes mom’s strength, all that she can do to cope, and how much the people and environment around her make a HUGE difference (it’s not all on you, mom!).
But really, what I love most about this video is how he makes fun of “intellectuals” who need to take “a class” and read books about this supposedly “natural” process. I am definitely the butt of that joke!
What do you think? Do people talk about pain in labor in a way that makes you feel informed and empowered? Or just flat-out scared? Or a little of both?
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6 Comments
Nadia commented on Oct 25 11 at 12:21 pmHahahaha salad spoons! That is hilarious! I will definitely show that video to my hubby.
When people talk about the pain of labor, it does make me a little bit scared. At the same time, though, I remember that the pain won’t last forever.
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Voice of Reason commented on Oct 25 11 at 12:53 pmMy British stiff-upper-lip mum never spoke much about childbirth, other than to say it was greatly exaggerated on television. I am the polar opposite of my mother and I speak to my children (7 and 5) about their births regularly. As they get older, I plan to be very honest about the pain of labour and how we managed it.
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I just don’t think it’s helpful to keep people in the dark about the messy reality of childbirth. Yes, it’s damned painful, but the endorphin rush afterwards lasts for days! Women’s bodies (generally speaking) come fully equipped for this very important job and that’s the piece that should ALWAYS be included when we talk about the pain.
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The best advice ever given to me about birthing? With my second child, I laboured at home all day and I showed up at the birth centre 8.5 cm dilated. When I was just about ready to push, we started moving towards the birthing pooI and I said to my midwife, “I’m not sure I can do this.” And instead of stating the obvious (“Ummm you don’t have much choice now, sunshine”) she said soothingly, “That’s what people say to me just before they do it, so that’s how I know you can do it.”
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So to summarize, yes we really do need to be honest about the pain – we only fail to prepare women by being dishonest about it… how disempowering is that? BUT, we also need to be honest about the fact that we can handle it. I am woman hear me roar, you know?
Ginny in CO commented on Oct 25 11 at 3:56 pmLOL, thanks for the Cosby nostalgia trip. Totally agree with the article. I had a C section the first time because my uterus failed to do anything when my water broke.*
The vaginal birth was much quicker, got uncomfortable about 5 cm. The epidural at about 6 cm was very fine. Still some discomfort that I don’t remember much.
What I do remember was that although the episiotomy was painful, NOTHING compared to the mastitis/nipple excoriation I had for weeks. I had forgotten how much I prepared them during the first pregnancy.
Even that was worth it.
* DO NOT DRINK WATER FROM A SALT EXCHANGE WATER SOFTENER DURING PREGNANCY. You get: pre-eclampsia, hyper-amniotic fluid production and a useless uterus.
ceridwen commented on Oct 25 11 at 6:34 pmVoice Of Reason: I LOVE THIS!! Midwives can say just the right thing: “That’s what people say to me just before they do it, so that’s how I know you can do it.”
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ceridwen commented on Oct 25 11 at 6:39 pmNo Nadia it definitely does not last forever and there are far worse kinds of pain (chronic pain, emotional pain, the pain of something being broken). This is intense muscle pain b/c your uterus (at that point in pregnancy) is the biggest muscle in your body. It’s no walk in the park but Voice Of Reason is absolutely right, we need to always remember that this is something we can cope with.
Ginny– Now I’m googling this salt water business– very interesting!
Voice of Reason commented on Oct 25 11 at 11:41 pm@Ceridwen, she and the other attending midwife (who stayed two hours past the end of her shift to ensure my birth went well, because she *remembered* me from two years before) both got sent big boxes of lovely chocolates. Midwives rock!
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