Being Pregnant
My Last Baby Girl, and My First
Maybe I want my baby to be a little bit like my dog.
Two Fridays ago, I found out that I’ll be having a baby girl. Just moments later, as we were leaving the doctor’s office, I also found out that I’d be losing my other “baby girl.”
This other baby was a Brussels Griffon pup with a red-blonde coat and a sassy personality to match. She came to us on a plane from California 11 years ago, and as she scooted her little self out of a cargo cage and into my sister’s arms, the four of us collectively acknowledged finding something we didn’t know we were missing: a baby sister to dote on.
She stole my clothes (socks, mostly) as well as my friends, and her incessant “talking” was the stuff any older sister would balk at. But she was also cuddly and sweet, a complete show-off, a bit of a snob and a bigger bit of mischief. Audrey Hepburn had a beloved dog she named “Mr. Famous,” and we found it appropriate to name ours after him. With her trained prance and funny way of holding her chin, it was a moniker she didn’t even have to try to live up to. Aside from being a total character, she could make even the most small-dog-averse dude friend come to like her.
About a year ago, Miss Famous got a cough that never left. In short, her trachea was collapsing and she was having difficulty breathing. We knew she would struggle, but we didn’t know when it would be time to say “when.” Her time came two Fridays ago, when my mom could no longer bear her suffering though she was still active and relatively spry which made it only harder. We put her down just an hour after I left the doctor’s office, and it was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to be part of—and certainly not just because I’m pregnant.
But I have to say that watching something die, while knowing another something is starting inside you turns a bitter experience into a bittersweet one. I felt hopeful, like I’m a creative impetus in this thing we call the Circle of Life, or like my body can make someone I can love just as much and even more than the one I had to leave behind. It’s a pretty cool thing.
2011 has been an even harder year than the one Famous arrived in—and boy, did we need her then. I think I’m hoping that my baby will give my family some much-needed hope in the same way a four-legged one did, nearly a decade ago.
So, will I name my baby girl “Famous” after our beloved dog? Probably not. But do I hope that she’ll be reincarnated as my baby? Maybe a little.
Though she would be a total handful.
Take my pets … please! I used to love my dog and cats. Then I had a baby.
Go Back To Being Pregnant
8 Comments
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My Last Baby Girl, and My First – Babble (blog) | Get Pregnant With Boy commented on Aug 11 11 at 8:40 pmJessica commented on Aug 11 11 at 4:08 pmI would love for my daughter to be like my kitty OR my sweet doggie.
Dede commented on Aug 11 11 at 4:14 pmOh Ali. I get teary just thinking of that day for you. Having lived it a few short months ago I know how difficult that it. Those four-legged friends are more like family. Thanks for sharing.
Jennifer Hess commented on Aug 11 11 at 4:15 pmMy husband and I said goodbye to our beloved cat Kali, a beautiful 9 year old flame-point Siamese cross, on September 16th of last year. She had mammary cancer, and despite fighting in her feisty way for almost a year after her diagnosis, the treatments, and her health and spirit, were failing. Letting her go was one of the hardest, saddest things we’ve gone through as a couple.
We learned in January that we were expecting a baby – something neither of us had planned for (and frankly thought wasn’t in the cards for us). He’s due on September 15th, and I won’t lie – when I first heard that date I kind of lost it. It’s bittersweet to think that we’ll be welcoming a new member into our family at the same time we remember the one we lost a year ago.
Pets are family, and I really believe they teach us a lot about love and sacrifice, about patience and selflessness and giving. In a way, maybe they even teach us a little about how to be parents, how to care for a completely dependent little being.
Stuart Rubenstein commented on Aug 11 11 at 5:07 pmAhh!! That is so sad yet at the same time it is quite an interesting story. We do get so attached with our pets and rightfully so. They are just as human in my eyes.
Thanks
Stuart http://www.babyoutfitstoday.com
alismith commented on Aug 11 11 at 5:10 pmThank you for your comments! Jennifer, I love your thoughts about sacrifice and selflessness. September will always be a special month for you.
Paulina commented on Aug 12 11 at 11:08 amOh this brings tears to my eyes. 3 days ago, we had to put down our family dog, Dixie. She was 17(!) and I basically grew up with her, since she’s been in my family since I was 9 years old. I too couldn’t help but feel a little bittersweet about it, knowing that my own baby girl will never get to meet her.
mollymayhem commented on Aug 24 11 at 7:11 amMy husband and I had to put our dog down (12 yrs – kidney failure) on the same day (July 29?). It was awfully sad. But instead of getting a new dog, we are trying for a baby. If it’s a girl, we might name her after the dog!
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