Being Pregnant
36 Weeks Pregnant and Beginning to Feel The Crunch
My comfy vintage rocker arrived yesterday. Now I need a baby to rock in it!
Pre-pregnancy, I tended to be easily susceptible to stress and negative thoughts, though during my pregnancy, I’ve been focusing on being a more optimistic person. It’s made me more happy than I’ve felt in a long time. I’ve been pretty mellow and laid back during this whole experience and I think it’s partially due to feeling well-educated and prepared for the most part.
However, last night I had a little breakdown.
While practicing some exercises to prepare my mind for contractions, I mentally broke down. I was deep into a wall sit, just short of 1 minute when I collapsed. I burst into tears and began crying so hard, I think my husband thought I’d gone into labor for a second! With so much on my mind these days, I just couldn’t hold it in any longer. All the thoughts about the hospital bag, birth plan, breast feeding, baby’s sleep clothes, diaper pails, etc, just came pouring out. He pulled me onto the bed and started rubbing my back until I calmed down.
I feel better today. For the most part at least. I know if our boy were to make his appearance tomorrow, we’d be perfectly fine with what we’ve got. But as prepared and educated as I’ve made myself feel this entire time, sometimes I can’t help but feeling unprepared. What needs to be done to do before I go into labor? Will I be able to breastfeed? What do I still need to purchase before he arrives? Since I’m a natural born list maker, I decided a to-do list was in order. List making helps me focus and figure out a plan of action. So here goes.
• Finalize birth plan.
• Pack hospital bag and make a list of things to be put in last minute.
• Purchase outstanding items that are considered “must-haves” for a newborn.
• Make appointment with a lactation specialist pre-delivery.
• Walk, walk, walk, walk. Continue to build up that endurance!
What about you? What kind of things, if any, were you anxious about in the days before giving birth?
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3 Comments
Brooke R. commented on Apr 21 11 at 12:03 pmAlyson, there was so much to feel anxious about but for me the thing I worried about most was that I had never taken care of a newborn before. Would I know what to do? As it was there was no need to worry. Mama instincts will kick in and, honestly, the first few weeks are pretty easy. I mean, the baby is waking up to eat a lot, but they sleep a TON! I pretty much laid around (the midwife told me to lay down 80% of the time the first week and 50% the second week) and let Scott do things for me. I just focused on Juniper. And don’t worry about breastfeeding. It might be difficult (for some it is) but most women are able to if they want. Just know it will hurt but by six weeks you and your little guy will be pros. And just a little side note, there aren’t much must haves for newborns. Diapers, onesies, and a swaddle blanket or two. Other than that they just need you. :) I will be sending positive thoughts your way the next few weeks!
Jessica commented on Apr 21 11 at 12:04 pmI can totally relate! Most of the time, I feel pretty on top of things (I’m 7 months, and the nursery is done, car seat installed, tiny baby clothes bought, washed, and folded, breast pump parts washed and ready to go, birthing/hospital classes under way!), but I definitely have meltdown moments of feeling like, “holy shit, I don’t know if I can do this. What if I can’t breastfeed? Or the baby gets colic and that makes me hate him? Or I turn out to be a failure of a mother?!” Like you, I am a list-maker, so usually these panics send me 1) crying to my husband for some TLC and then 2) to my spreadsheet of crap to do before the baby comes. Checking things off that list always helps, at least momentarily. Also, just letting it (read:sobbing uncontrollably for a little bit) out and moving on has proven a pretty necessary relief.
But in the end, there are only so many things you can prepare/plan for. Much of life is just going to be what it is. I personally like to think through all those possibilities ahead of time so I can be ready for any eventuality. But that is exhausting, and there’s no way to mentally prepare for EVERY possibility. Some stuff you just have to live through. This is my first child, so I’m guessing, but it seems likely that with parenthood, the number of things you just have to ride out are going to be a LOT. To deal with that reality, I try to remind myself of how happy and content I am in my life now, and how much of that happiness and contentment has not been derived from things I could plan or control. Sure, you try to make good choices along the way. But some of the absolute best parts of my life have been a result of random coincidence plus sheer luck. Like the ice cubes and wall squats, that little affirmation has also become a regular part of my ‘preparing for birth/baby’ routine. That, and deep breaths :)
Good luck to you!
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christine commented on Apr 21 11 at 1:49 pmI’m 36 weeks, too, and it’s the not knowing when I’ll go into labor and not knowing what will happen afterwards bits that are getting to me. I’m a planner. I like baking, not cooking. I like following the scientific recipe exactly and knowing just what I’ll get out of the oven. No pinches here, sprinklings there. For me, everything is “done” but I have no idea what happens next. I guess we will just have to hang in there!
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