Babys First Year Blog

Breastfeeding Isn’t Sexy

Posted by madelinepetersen on October 12th, 2011 at 10:20 am

2127059207 16abbb0a6d 300x199 Breastfeeding Isnt SexyThe last time I wrote about breastfeeding in public, I was a brand new mother that felt somewhat self-conscious while doing it. The longer I breastfeed, the more strongly I feel about a mother’s right to do it in public. And I don’t just mean their legal right. I mean their right to do it openly, often, and wherever necessary without judgement.

You can imagine I was shocked to recently read this small blurb in the Bozeman Montana Police reports,

A woman was breastfeeding a child on a South Third Avenue sidewalk at 11:51 a.m. The resident of a nearby home called police to find out whether public breastfeeding is legal.

September 15, 2011

Seriously?! Someone called the police on a breastfeeding mother? In Montana, as with most states, breastfeeding is protected by the law and I was happy to read three letters to the editor (including this one, by the breastfeeder in question) questioning the call to the police.

I am so disappointed in the perception of breastfeeding in public. Breastfeeding is one of the best things a mother can do for her baby. It is good for the baby’s health, mother’s health, more gentle on the environment, and frankly, the evolutionary reason women have breasts. I know that not every mother can nurse, but every mother who wants to, should be supported by the rest of us. To be made to feel shamed, self-conscious, judged or harassed is incredibly discouraging to mothers trying hard to do a good thing that is hard enough on its own.

I am so tired of people trying to censor nursing because they are projecting their sexualized view of women’s breasts onto a natural act. Why is it that in this day and age, we are more comfortable with bare midriffs, micro minis, and excessive amounts of cleavage than we are with a baby eating lunch.

I say, If you want to breastfeed openly in public – do it. If you want to do it with a cover – do it. If you think it’s an intimate and private thing, then do it at home. But I don’t think anyone has the right to tell people how or where to feed their baby.

image : flickr | fikirbaz

Read Natalie’s take | Nursing Is Not Gross

 Breastfeeding Isnt Sexy

5 Comments

I completely agree that it’s not okay that people have issues with breastfeeding vs. cleavage, etc… however, I do have some issues with cleavage, and so on, and happen to know several guys who’ve talked about how hot nursing is. So, in that situation, I opt for the cover-up idea, not for “offended” people, but for people that are trying to not be attracted to other women. I asked a few guy friends in college if boobs were inately hot, or if it was just the fact that they were “forbidden” in our culture that made them interesting. Topless tribes of Africa and all that. After some debate, it was decided that it was both.The point is, natural or not, breasts are more than nutritional. But people get WAY too up in arms about the whole thing, I don’t know a single breastfeeding mother who’d be comfortable with the idea of walking down the street totally topless. If people see ANYTHING (let’s be honest, they usually don’t, they’re disturbed by the idea, which is nonsense) it’s a little bit of the top of a breast, above the baby’s head. Not a big deal. At all. And, the more common it was, the less of a big deal it would be. So, in case you can’t tell, it’s a bit of a soap box for me, too. I’m totally a nurse anywhere person, and I don’t necessarily bother with a cover once they get older and better at it, but the one thing I wish was that I felt comfortable not leaving Relief Society or Sunday School to nurse. I’m just not ready to be “that” wardmember, you know? But I hate having to choose which part of the block I’ll miss. Madeline, I’m loving your blog, by the way (I’m guessing you can tell since I comment constantly. Sorry. :-D)

Heather commented on Oct 12 11 at 2:18 pm

Madeline, you are SPOT ON. I was listening to an NPR something or other way back when & it was a really lively discussion about breast vs. bottle & about how neither are supported by our community very well. I’ve gotten harassed for bottle feeding in public (apparently my non-existent breastmilk would’ve been better for my growing baby than formula or something stupid like that). And I know other women who have been harassed for breast feeding in public. Seriously? None of us win.

If a woman needs to feed her child in public, bare breasts or no, she should be able to do it. That, or all people (grown ups & babes) should be banned from eating in public.

Melissa commented on Oct 12 11 at 4:00 pm

Very well said, dearie.

As children benefit society, what benefits children benefits society as a whole. And that definitely includes breastfeeding, wherever it happens to happen.

I certainly think the stigmas that surround feeding babies need to be done away with. If you’re doing your best to feed your little one — breast or bottle — you should be commended, not condemned.

Kristyn commented on Oct 12 11 at 4:02 pm

When I was pregnant, my SIL once asked me, “You’re not going to be one of those moms who just nurses in front of everyone, are you?” And at the time, thinking about my young, immature brothers-in-law {Christian has five younger brothers}, I thought, there’s no way I’m exposing my breasts to them! So I said no. But looking back, I feel like I should have set her straight. Whenever another mom now asks me if I mind if she breastfeeds around me, I always say no, not at all, because I want them to feel comfortable around me. I agree, it’s not sexy, and if someone feels uncomfortable around a breastfeeding mother, I would recommend that they act as if she’s wearing a piece of clothing they’re uncomfortable with, and just look away until they can grow up and get over it already.

Mary commented on Oct 12 11 at 8:12 pm

The first thing that I noticed upon “The Bozeman Chronicle” webpage was the pink ribbon at the top of the page. Its a shame that during this month of “Breast Cancer Awareness” you don’t hear people talking about how nursing reduces the risk of breast cancer.

Ok, that seems off-topic. But, those breast ribbons are everywhere. And you’d be hard-pressed to find people who think that finding a cure for breast cancer is not a noble cause. On the other hand, you won’t have any problem finding people criticizing mothers, like myself, nursing a child in a public place.

Casey commented on Oct 14 11 at 4:03 pm

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