I remember one particularly horrible afternoon/evening when both boys were inconsolable. My solution? I put them each in a swing (which did not stop the crying) and laid on the floor between them to cry myself.

I have to admit, I’m one of those moms who lets their babies howl in the crib. I think both of my babies tend to get overstimulated, and so bouncing/singing/rocking only makes it worse. Babies need to have a good cry every once in a while, and they feel better afterward. I think to myself, “Are they full? Are they warm? Do they have a dry diaper?” and if the answers to those questions are all “yes,” and if I’ve tried to calm them down with no success, I know that I’ve done all I can do, and I leave them be. I’ll let them cry for 20 minutes, then go in and pick them up to let them know that I haven’t forgotten them, give them a pacifier and put them back down. I’ve had to convince myself that I’m not a terrible person, but it’s really what they need sometimes!

Put him in the wrap for some quiet time. These days I’d sing gently to him, but when he was as young as Tate it was enough for him to just be close to me.

Sometimes they do seem to need a good cry. In my opinion there’s a big difference between crying in your arms, and crying alone in a cot, but that’s a call every parent has to make for themselves.

Do laundry! This worked for my son. Put him in his car seat and set it on the dryer. The hum of the dryer and noise of the washer soothed him. I could fold laundry and iron while he watched me.

The other thing that works is to go for a ride in the car. My parents did that with me when I was little. A car ride put me to sleep every time.

Have you tried music? Eric was always happy with Mozart…. or Earth Wind and Fire.

We love the swing for those wit’s end moments, it almost always worked when nothing else would, but I’m definitely a “have they been fed, changed, burped and snuggled? Then let them cry a few minutes to sleep.” kind of mom. Every one of my kids will/would go to sleep within 5-10 minutes if left on their own in the crib. If you try to hold them or rock them to sleep, you’re looking at a 45 minute minimum. It makes church napping hard, but the rest of the time, it’s so nice to be able to just lay them down and let them deal with it themselves. They sleep so well, and wake up so happy, it’s totally worth it to me.