Yeah, lying to your kids is brilliant
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I’m a Jew. I shouldn’t have to put up with this. We’ve put up with enough.
I don’t know what parent thought, “Won’t kids like Tinkertoys more if Santa gives it to them instead of me?” But that person was an idiot. An idiot with great marketing skills, but an idiot nonetheless.
I’ve watched my son open presents. He cares what it is. He does not care who gave it to him. If I told him the Thomas the Train set was from Pol Pot, he’d still love it just as much.
And, yes, I’ve told my two-year old about Pol Pot. But not Santa.
Santa confuses kids who are trying to figure out how the world works. “Birds can fly. And reindeer too. Got it, Dad!”
Why does a fun story need to be sold as real to please a kid? Our son doesn’t think the Cat in the Hat is real. he knows Frosty the Snowman isn’t real. But he likes those guys. Because he’s not an idiot who it’s super-fun to lie to.
I want my kid to trust me.
And to know I bought him those presents.
The problem, of course, is the rest of you. I don’t want my son making your kids cry from exposure to the truth. I’m not an anti-Santa evangelist. And I don’t want him being a freak in his social circle. So if he asks about Santa, I’ll tell him the story and imply that it’s true.
But it makes me want to move to Israel.
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I agree with Jenny about everything cause she is right. Especially about Santa and the Zombies.
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That was Beyonce, Jenny.
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I don’t tell my kid that Santa isn’t real. I also don’t tell her that there are parents who beat their kids, men who rape women, and assholes who are racist. At some point she will grow up and come to find out the truth about the world. Until then why not let kids be kids and let them have the fun of imagination and pretend play? There are sprinkles of reality … she understands that different religions have different beliefs and we are to respect those beliefs. She understands that Christians believe in Santa and Jesus and those of Muslim / Jewish / etc. faiths do not … and that different isn’t bad, just different. She would never insult some other child’s belief whether from a different religion or country, or insist that they don’t have the right to believe just because she doesn’t. I would expect other parents to raise their kids with the same respect, and if not – then what a shame. Yes adults can take religious beliefs and so-called values too far leading to many adult-issues with religious persecution etc. But I’ve never met a baby or toddler or pre-schooler or child (who is still in naive innocent phase) that uses Santa to purposefully make others feel badly about their own beliefs or themselves, so why not allow them the fun of believing? And of course our kids enjoy presents no matter what, but have you ever had your child truly light up from the joy of an unexpected gift? Or seen the difference in joy at a planned party vs. surprise? Or seen kids reactions when a parent surprises them with a trip to Disney? That is similar to the fun and joy at Christmas eve and morning (for us anyway) … it is not the presents so much as the anticipation and wonder and surprise in the morning. That is the moment of fun and pure joy the myth of Santa is. One day they won’t bound out of bed, they will be happy but not toddler-belly-laugh happy. But I know they will be that way because they are now too mature to look for the potential magic, not because they hate us for a “lie” -because Santa is a tradition that is done out of love, and as kids become too mature to believe, give them enough credit to realize they can recognize love.
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we’re going to my parents’ for christmas. they’re christians. my sister lives there. she’s christian. i converted to judaism when i married my husband.
the first combined christmas sent me back to the shrink.
the second we escaped to costa rica.
this will be the third.
my sister has already emailed me asking how we’re going to handle the fact that her son lays out cookies, gets stockings and presents from santa and also now there’s apparently a #&%ing elf involved as well. something about flying off to the north pole to tell santa how her 8 year old behaves.
as if shit weren’t complicated enough with good old jesus.
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Your last line made me LOL! I have to ask though, if you don’t celebrate Christmas (or want your kids to) then why don’t you visit earlier in December, later in December, or sometime in January instead? So you can still enjoy the fun of being together and family time, and aspects of the holiday season without being forced to participate in something that isn’t / is no longer part of your tradition? I mean we get together with our Jewish friends at some point during the holiday season … which judging by WalMart starts shortly after October 31st and lasts until approximately Feb 13th. But it’s not like we invite them to midnight mass to sing carols together, that would be rather fucked up. But since we like each other and enjoy time together and respect each others’ cultures it’s not terribly hard to figure out a plan that works for all of us.
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Surprises and excitement can still be accomplished without the myths. My children light up every time they receive a surprise or gift all through the year. They know that santa is a myth and they are so happy still. In fact when they hear anything wrong at all they take notice and want no part of it. They still play dress up and tea party, they pretend they are lions and princesses. They know how to be happy with what we do have and they know the love we share is more precious than any gift they could ever receive.They have moral’s and they are the sweetest little girls you could imagine. Yet we all have our own belief’s and we should all be very thankful for one another. Thank you.
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Are you going to tell your son you have a man crush on Ryan Gosling?
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Christians believe in Santa? Uh… no. That’s precisely why I don’t lie to my kid about Santa. I actually believe in Jesus. I want her to believe in Jesus. YOU don’t believe in Santa. You lie to your kid. It’s not about acceptance and diversity of beliefs. Muslims don’t lie to their kids about Allah and Mohammed. They actually believe in them. This Santa crap is utter bullshit.
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I’m a Christian & the daughter of a Southern Baptist Minister… & I think its UTTER BULLSHIT that ppl can actually b debating a story about a REAL MAN WHO DID REAL GOOD WORKS!!! Yeah the story has changed throughout time, but does NOT change the fact that Saint Nicholas WAS A REAL PERSON!!! JUST AS REAL AS JESUS… & YEAH SANTA CAN’T SAVE OUR SOULS, BUT IS IT REALLY SUCH A BAD THING 4 CHILDREN 2 BELIEVE IN SUM1 WHO IS JOLLY & CARING!!! I TAUGHT MY DAUGHTER THE REAL STORY OF SAINT NICHOLAS & SHE DECIDED SHE WANTED 2 VOLUNTEER IN A HOMELESS SHELTER 2 GIVE CHILDREN PRESENTS WHEN THEY WOULDN’T HAVE NETHING!!! IT’S IGNORANCE & PPL 2 FOCUSED ON HOW EVERY1 ELSE’S BELIEFS “RUIN” THEIRS THAT TAKES AWAY THE SPIRIT OF EVERY FUCKING HOLIDAY!!! IF U DON’T WANT UR CHILD ABOUT SANTA THAT’S UR DECISION, BUT DON’T U DARE DOWN ME BECAUSE I DO!!!
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I’m a Christian who completely agrees with this
The world is confusing enough without telling the kiddos that a fat man in a red suit commits breaking and entering to leave them toys and underwear every christmas eve…and yeah he travels faster than the speed of light and has 9 reindeer even though the story says 8 tiny reindeer because you have to explain Rudolph somehow… -
This made me laugh *inside of course* none of this LOL bull – but ANYWAYS…on topic – We are Christians with friends of many religions and cultures. We don’t do the Santa thing – my friends know we don’t and some applaud while others judge and criticize. I say, Why lie to my kid? He needs to know that no matter what his parents will be honest with him. I VIVIDLY remember how ANGRY I was with my parents when I figured the whole Santa thing out and decided at a very young age of about 7 that I would NEVER do that my kid and I haven’t. Its creepy anyways, some random stranger that we don’t know breaking into my house when we’re all asleep and eating our cookies, and then leaving presents *that I paid for btw* ???? dumb. I prefer the truth and I’ll keep it that way. I did ask my son this year how he felt about the whole santa thing *he’s 6* he said well, “lets leave some cookies out and if they are gone in the morning then we’ll know he’s real, but you and dad can’t eat them” so….we’re going to experiment. I think they’ll still be there and the answer will be: NO santa
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Santa Claus? Oh the holly king! I celebrate the winter solstice and since my beliefs are pagan I can appreciate the whole trimming of the tree and whatnot all the more. As for what everyone else wants to believe in or celebrate that’s their deal and I respect that as long they respect mine.
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We don’t believe in Santa at our house. How do you explain that kids who don’t wake up Christmas morning without anything under their tree are not misbehaved, only unfortunate? My kids can be terrors and still have something to look forward to, and they know who to thank.
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We have a Jewish/Mormon home. We do not do Santa gifts. Since our children were young we never pushed the subject on them. When they would ask us we would tell them do you really thing that thousands of elves make tons of toys for 8 reindeer to drag a fat man around the world to squeeze down a tiny chimney eat cookies drink milk to leave gifts. I understand the story behind the man but no reason for my kids to think it will ever happen.
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We don’t celebrate Christmas, or mythris as I so lovingly call it, it’s a huge heap of lies to distract us from the truth.
I used to be tense this time of year thinking at any moment my kids are going to tell my niece Santa is fake and Christmas is pagan. My SIL didn’t take kindly to us forgoing mythris celebrations 7 years ago and she was pretty much pissed at me for several years. Like I was some sort of devil worshipper, which is odd, because if you move one “n” in Santa it becomes Satan… coincidence? I think not!! Then she had their first child, my beautiful niece, and it got even more tense about the whole anti christmas celebration. She let me know often with her snide little remarks, though I never once was rude to her for keeping a wiccan holiday. We lay low during this time and never once protested their keeping of mythris, their lives, their choice. Aren’t we entitled to the same? I hate christmas, you hate that I don’t do it, shake hands and be done! However I don’t care anymore, they are the ones telling the lies and closing their eyes to the true roots of winter solstice…oh I mean Mythris..Christmas…blah…whatever you want to call it. Oh or my favorite CHRISTmas..lol…that one makes me laugh every time…if people only knew the origins of the word “christ” but most think it’s his last name. Oh the madness.
Anyways, I will move to Israel with you!! Let’s go! I told my husband when he makes us rich, Lord willing of course, I would love to invest in a vacation home somewhere that mythris isn’t heavily celebrated, and spend the entire month of december there. Also y’all know december is for month 10…yeah lots of history to our pagan traditions we have so willingly adopted, but I won’t get into that as I might make your mind explode with information overload. You can go research it yourself if you really want the truth. Or you can keep jumping off that cliff with the masses. I can say without a doubt my Yeshua (Jesus) doesn’t celebrate mythris, and no he doesn’t care what it means to you. He knows the true roots and he was there when children were sacrificed on your beloved self indulgent day. Did we miss the part where God hates pagan celebrations?? Did we forget the golden calf incident so easily?? I am pretty sure He speaks of absolute hate towards pagan celebrations and other Gods. Let’s call it what it is: Self indulgent, winter solstice celebration and stop using Jesus as a cover up to make us feel better about the loads of debt we just went into. Also how about we start giving to those in need year around instead of just mythris?? Oh by in need I don’t mean load of toys to kids who have no idea what starvation or being truly poor is. That chaps me most. What a waste of charity, there are children out there starving, not hungry, there is a difference, you don’t die from hunger. Here we are worried that kids have enough presents under their mythris tree..yuck.
Want to talk about Easter next?!?
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I guess its just me. I don’t have any -real- religious affiliation and I don’t really intend to raise my daughter to have one in any particular faith. I didn’t realize that Santa was a matter of religion. I thought it was a matter of kid’s imagination and the magic of their creativity and excitement. I have every intention of telling my daughter (whom I am 7 months pregnant with) all about Santa and doing all the traditionally fun things that you do with a kid at Christmas time.
Of course, my grandmother will also read her the Christmas story from the Bible and I am certainly fine with that too. I want her to have experiences of all things, real or otherwise. Why not let a kid be a kid and enjoy the way their faces light up when they get a letter from Santa or go visit with Santa or even get presents from Santa? I don’t really see what harm this is doing to the child.
I guess I just never realized that believing in Santa was based in a religion. At least, for me, it was based in being a kid and the joy Christmas brought. I never thought it was wrong to believe in both Jesus and Santa. They both represent two different things. Thanks for bringing a new perspective though, at least to me, I hadn’t really thought of Santa this way.
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This is actually funny because a friend of mine and I were just discussing the whole santa thing. Her mother let her believe in the Santa clause while my mother when it came time that i asked her about Santa, that she sat me down and told me the story of Saint Nicholas of whom the legend of Santa Clause comes from. Looking at ourselves today. We both turned out just fine. Santa Clause did not change our view of the world that we have today. If anything it reminds us of a more innocent time. I don’t believe the idea of Santa is bad. if anything it gives us parents a chance to teach our children a good valuable lesson in life. Such as the important of giving and being “good people” My mother used the idea of Santa to teach my sisters, brother and I the important of giving to show how we love our friends and family. Or how important it is to consider the needs of others before ourselves such as Saint Nicholas did throughout his life. All in all i think Santa is a very good thing. i especially like Secret Santas
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Why don’t you all just do what’s right for your own family? There should be zero debate here.
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Would you believe me if I told you all had childish some of you sound ,probably not .For one SANTA was a marketing campaign use by a store in New York yup that’s how it started. The red nosed reindeer and we all know the one; almost was not used because the owner was afraid that he was drunk!! This started in the forties; the person who wrote the first Santa story did so in rememberence of his gravely ill and dying child. I have the author’s name somewhere in my mail and am sure it would not be too hard to find. The point of the matter is how do we go about teaching children about hope and love and also disappointment with out using stories for our child’s imagination.Jesus used parables to confound those that were wise in their own eyes. But simple enough for a child to understand. No I don’t agree to lying to my children and I am due with #7 in the begining of March. Four of them mine and three step- children. I do tell them that Santa is for fun like when we due mystery gift exchange. Jesus is for saving our souls and yes there really was a Saint Nicholas,a Catholic Bishop from the early 1800′s who sole claim to fame was to leave gold on a poor family’s door step because they had a marriable daughter and no dowery. Point of fact I am not Catholic I was raised Lutheran, my husband was raised Pentacostal and right now we attend a Methodist church.Even the bible states that a tree decked with silver and gold is an idol and I had a Jehovah’s Witness point it out to me. They out celebrate the night of the last supper by the way at sundown. Jesus was born 6 months after John the Baptist who was born in April do the math. Saint Micheal’s Mass was invented to please the Catholic’s and the remaining Pagan’s who celebrate winter Sol on December 21st. But did not want two Holy Days so close together as to confuse people. Maybe those Pagan’s will convert mmm?? Later of course changed to the Christ’s Mass or Christmas we now call it today. To please all those God fearing Christians and boost Army morale back in WWI. Anyhow all of which is a matter of History at this point in time. I believe if you respect my view’s on life and what I teach my kids no matter how strange they sound I will respect yours. On a Jewish note my brother’s best friend Todd married a nice Jewish girl back in the 1990′s had a lovely wedding in New York ; Todd is a commercial pilot and they now live in Juno Alaska. He was raised a Holy Roller Christian LOL
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Really? What the crap foes race have to do with santa? I am native american so does it stands to reason I dont take part in thanksgiving? Please lets be adults. First off the whole story of where santa claus came from is based off a really person. Second there are dozens upon dozens of “santas” out there every year doing exactly what the original “Santa Clause” did. Year they may not driven a sleigh with 8 tiny reindeer or come down chimneys but there are wonderful strangers in this woeld who give ppl a christmas. if thats not magic then what is? I think its sad that there are ppl like you in this world that are more worried about being right and politically correct than you are about seeing what this holiday is about. Its about innocence. Its about believing in something that even though its silly and unbelievable its fun. Its about family and laughter. Its about good food and even better company. Its about just letting go and not being afraid to run down the stairs and giggle and laugh. Its about so much more than getting into stupid debates over santa clause. And as far as wanting ur kids to trust you well telling them about a man that delivers presents is just keeping that innocence and child alive. Kids grow up too fast as it is. Why make them anyone cynical than they already are? And no before you go all what a typical christian thing to say I am not christian. I am pagan. And I still say MERRY CHRISTMAS! And I hope that all of you get a little less grinchy and a whole lot more merry.
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My husband and I had the discussion of Santa this year as our 2&1/2 yr old is understanding Christmas and Santa. Being raised Catholic, the idea of Santa came in second to the birth of Jesus in my house. My husband does not have any religion in his childhood and working in medicine, he questions religion regularly. We decided that as a child growing up in a time where you can’t ride your bike alone in the neighborhood without fear of abduction, a dismal economy and terrorism why not let her believe in the spirit of Christmas. We don’t feel the “elf” is a tradition for our house…why threaten her with a creepy “watcher” doll for a month when we should be working all year with her to develop manners and good character. One day in the not too distant future someone will tell her the truth about Santa. I was told by a teenage Christian next door…so I don’t assume a Jewish person or any other non-Christian will be the one to tell her. I hope it can be me. Until then, I will cherish the memories of her excitement on Christmas morning. I also don’t discourage her from dressing like a princess because she shouldn’t have a prince rescue her, and I have not told her there is someone dressed in a Mickey suit at Disney World. She has her whole adult life to be disappointed in reality. I choose to let my daughter have as magical a childhood as she can.
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What about the childhood obesity problem? Does putting Santa on a pedestal and loading him up with milk and cookies contribute to this growing healthcare crisis?
In all seriousness, I’m Jewish and never did the Santa thing with my kids. But I always wondered how parents handled the issue of poverty, meaning why doesn’t Santa give poor kids presents? In fact, I just blogged about this yesterday at http://www.PlaydatePlanet.com/blog.
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I don’t see it as lying to your kids. Only an adult would see it that way. It starts with santa. Then they get older and it works into the spirit of Christmas. That’s all I’m trying to teach my kids. And finally, finally my 9 year old got it this year. My other child said, mom xmas is about opening gifts. And my 9 year old said no, it’s about being with your family and celebrating the spirit of xmas. It doesn’t have to be just a religious holiday for all those non believers. I am a believer, join me!!
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I laughed so hard at some of the religious people cursing and using CAPS to get their point across. This article asked of our opinion not and insane debate where we yell at each other for being right or wrong.. You guys are so silly. ANYWHO~ that being said, my daughter who’s about to be 6 learned of Jesus before santa. I just left it up to her to decide if she wanted to believe in him or not. I was considered catholic but now am of no religion. I choose to believe in a higher being I just don’t agree with all the bickering about who’s right and wrong and hell or what have you. She does how ever go to a christian preschool (she’s been there since she was 18 months) and they have taught her more of Jesus then anything. Her father and I have never told her santa is real or fake. We do how ever, take her to buy gifts for her friends and she has always helped to pick out gifts for family members. So she knows that Christmas in our house is about giving to those we love and being thankful for all that we have. We decorate a tree because it’s pretty and we like to do that together as a family. We say Happy Holidays to everyone because we don’t think Christmas is just about Jesus when it is a time for all other religions to celebrate family, love, and peace as well. She prays for thanks before bed and meals, but when she doesn’t want to, we don’t force her. I just believe in allowing her to make a choice and we discuss her choice.
For me christmas is just about giving to those who do not have (although we do that all year round), appreciating what we do have and ACCEPTANCE of everyone. Happy Holidays to everyone.. I hope we can discuss this with out all the CAPS and !!!.. lol -
Idiotic narrowminded people are way more irritating than a jolly selfless giver who wants less fortunate people to be happy. And the cookie and milk comment above was completely asinine. You people need to relax. Merry F-ing Christmas to you too.
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Um, the cookie and milk comment was a joke, Melissa. I think you’re the one that needs to relax.
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“And to know I bought him those presents.”
This is the reason I think anti-Santa advocates are kind of …icky. I don’t know anyone who was honestly broken inside because someone told them a story that wasn’t true, ie the “Santa Lie”. As you say, the Cat in the Hat didn’t break your kid yet. More than that, it’s the impression I get that the anti-Santa camp isn’t happy to give a present anonymously, because they need the recipient of their gift to KNOW that who spent their precious money on it. That’s not the spirit of Christmas, and of Santa, as I know it.
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I wrote about this as well, Joel, but a lot of people don’t understand our view. I blame it on our society’s general lack of imagination. They don’t understand that there is a difference between magic and imagination. They love watching Frosty the Snowman and watching all manner of superhero shows, and we don’t scare them by telling them those figures are going to go to every single person’s house in the whole world in one night by flying through the air. There is so much wrong with that, I don’t know where to begin. But unlike you, I’m annoyed that I have to participate. My kid is smart enough to understand Santa as a character, and I’m a good enough parent that I can teach him different people have different beliefs. He will get presents either way.
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Points I take from above: (1) you do not have to be Christian to believe in Santa, I was going under the assumption that Santa is primarily celebrated in homes where if they had to choose a religion on paper would write “Christian”, even if they never go to church – but that is a whole ‘nother debate! Rambling point is – Santa can (and I fully support should) be a non-denominational way (for everyone who chooses to participate) for everyone to have some holiday fun (2) I am really really glad that there are people kind enough to disagree with “Santa” yet agree it is up to parents to decide what to do with their own kids. That can be said for most if not all aspects of parenting – there is rarely straight forward right vs. wrong, but just differences. If you start with the belief that parents truly love their kids, then it is easy to be tolerant of differences of parenting style opinion. (obvious extreme examples and abusive parenting not included – of course) (3) I completely agree with the comment re: poor children whose parents can’t afford Santa being set up for disappointment. I try to do my best to help balance that out through giving. But we could all help in other ways too, one of the nicest ways I heard of a parent helping to make Santa an “equal giver” shall we say, was she gave her child cheap items from Santa and did say the expensive ones were from her and her husband. That way her kid still got the fun of surprise Santa gifts, but was stuff everyone could afford ( yes everyone – in this day and age it is still possible to find fun trinkets at the dollarstore. My kids have just spent the last 48 hours being amused by $1 silly putty for goodness sake!). Which brings next point (4) yes her kids still got expensive toys …as do my kids. My kids also get expensive things at birthdays, and other occasions, have nice wardrobes, are enrolled in several extra curricular activities and have never wanted for quality food. I do budget well so we aren’t in debt, we teach them about budget, they don’t get everything they want and are not spoiled in the true sense of that word -they are lucky. But they know it, we know it, and we do appreciate our life. I do feel very badly for kids that don’t have what we have, which is why we try to help out where we can with charities such as “Project Night Night”. Sure there are lots of times we spend money on our kids and ourselves we could have donated to a worthy cause, but unless you are living a life of no luxury -which would basically mean living on the same budget a truly poor person lives off of, in the manner that they do, and donate every last cent you earn otherwise to charity … then you are really in no position to judge us creating room in our budget to give our kids some toys at Christmas and birthdays. And (5) I still don’t feel remotely bad for participating in the Santa aspect of Christmas, as I say the same thing to my kids that I do after they ask about Jesus and that Christmas story – that different people believe different things, and it is up to them to figure out what they choose to believe in. In the case of Santa, it is what little kids believe vs. older kids/adults/people who don’t follow that tradition. In fact, I think it is an ideal way to introduce kids as to how different religions believe different things without making them feel another religion is “bad” or “wrong” but different. Otherwise how do you teach a child that Christians believe Jesus was the Son of God and Jews do not? If only one version can be right, do you tell them the others deluded and lying to their kids?
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This is so ridiculous. The easter bunny, the tooth fairy and santa claus will all be a part of my daughter’s life.
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Oh and I love my mother more than anyone in this entire world. There is no way I could possibly love her anymore than I do now. And I don’t hate her for telling me there was a Santa, a tooth fairy, or an easter bunny. If kids were honestly hurt by the thought of a parent lying to them about such a thing, they wouldn’t do it for their kids. I’m doing it for mine because its fun, i love seeing her face light up, i love seeing her with such a high spirit and when the time comes, she will find out that it isn’t true, but she will not be told by snobby kids that its just a big fat lie. I will tell her the truth. I will tell her why people tell their children of santa. she is not going to hate me. what a stupid debate.
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I agree with you, Joel. Children love gifts regardless of whom they’re from. They also very much enjoy ‘make-believe’ and ‘pretend,’ such as when they’re playing dress-up or with toys or whathaveyou. It’s not offensive to children knowing the ‘pretend house’ that they’re playing in isn’t there. So why feed them something, such as Santa, when the inevitable will happen of eventually having to upset them by stating the obvious? I never put too much thought into it, until an atheist stated his take on it, “Everything I was told growing up was a lie. All those things you can’t see or feel was a lie. Easter bunny, tooth fairy, Santa, etc. So upon the discovery of all of that being a lie, why on earth would I believe G-d is real?” It’s unfortunate really. Of course, every parent has the right to handle the situation as they see fit, but why bother with pulling your child into a world that you’ll soon have to crush? They truly love gifts just as much, whether it’s from Mommy and Daddy, or Santa. Pretending is just as much fun, and doesn’t hurt anyone in the near future upon discovery that none of it’s real.
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