It’s time to stop blaming the victims of drug overdose
Posted July 25th, 2011 at 6:40 am
I’ve always winced when I’ve seen late night comedians and watercooler gossips poke their all-too-easy fun at very young and very gifted Amy Winehouse. To so many, her increasingly skeletal frame and bizarre behavior were public carnival. To those of us who have watched the disease of drug addiction take its toll on the people we love, there was no entertainment in what we saw, and I can guarantee you with 100 percent certainty that Amy Winehouse’s mother and father didn’t get the jokes.
And now she’s gone.She was only 27 years old.
When I heard the news of Amy Winehouse’s death on Saturday, my heart dropped and I wept. I might not have known Amy personally, but sadly, I know very, very personally how her mother and father have been hurting in the days since they got the phone call that every parent of a young addict dreads.
No cause of death has yet been given publicly for Amy’s death, but the odds are pretty good that she died of an overdose or some other complication of her disease. We likely won’t know for days or weeks what happened, but if it turns out that it was an overdose of illegal drugs that took Amy Winehouse’s life, I hope that the media will make note of the fact that while Amy Winehouse may have been a drug addict, it was a drug dealer who killed her. What I am saying is this: if Amy Winehouse died of an overdose of illegally distributed drugs, there is a criminal walking free today who actively preyed on and profited from the vulnerability that her addiction created for her. That drug dealer or dealers should be identified, arrested and held criminally liable for distributing the drugs involved in her overdose before he or she kills someone else’s beloved child.
Overdoses of illegal drugs are almost always deemed “accidental” by authorities, when in fact, there is really nothing accidental about them. It’s not an “accident” when a drug dealer knowingly targets someone whom he or she knows to be an addict as a customer, and then commits a felony in distributing drugs to that vulnerable customer. The fact that overdose victims might have asked for the drugs that killed them, and even paid money for them does not obviate the criminal liability of the drug dealers who distribute to them.
If Amy Winehouse had suffered from schizophrenia that created delusional thinking, and had as a direct result of her specific mental illness offered someone a great deal of money to provide a loaded gun to her and specifically show her how to put it in her mouth and pull the trigger, no one would excuse the shooter by saying, “well, she asked for him to do it, so she deserved what she got.” No, instead we would all be appalled that someone would be cruel enough to agree to take money from someone he knew very well to be mentally ill in exchange for providing her with the necessary materials and information to kill herself or someone else, something that he knew or should have known was likely to happen. Yet, when it comes to drug dealers who actively target, prey on, and profit from individuals struggling in the grip addiction we too often give these dangerous criminals a free pass, placing all the blame on the dead overdose victim herself.
Our cultural attitudes toward overdose deaths caused by the illegal distribution of drugs – prescription or illicit – absolutely must change. Both in Great Britain and here in the United States, it is not overstating the case to say that we are losing a generation to a specific type of profit-driven criminal activity that clearly and directly targets its victims. Yet, far too often, law enforcement, prosecutors, medical examiners and public health officials still refer to deaths resulting from the illegal distribution of drugs as “unintentional,” or “accidental.”
Think of it this way – most drunk drivers who end up killing someone certainly never intended to hurt anyone when they got behind the wheel while impaired, much less kill anybody. But if a drunk driver does kill someone as the direct result of his or her criminal behavior, we don’t write this off as a tragic “accident.” Instead, we arrest, charge, and prosecute drunk drivers who kill, even if in their own minds, the death they caused was unintentional and accidental.
In another example, perhaps a woman has chosen to return again and again to a husband who beats her badly. Each time she leaves, she packs up her children and goes to spend a few days at a local domestic violence shelter, where trained counselors work as hard as they can to help her break free of this obviously high-risk relationship. Her family reaches out repeatedly, begging her to break away from a man everyone but the victim herself can see is likely to ultimately kill her. But no matter what anyone tells her, she always gives him another chance. This cycle goes on for several years, until one day, just as everyone told her would happen if she stayed with him, the husband beats her to death.
In this scenario, do we blame the woman for her own death given that she repeatedly returned to the abuser, even when she was offered all the help she needed to break free? Does the fact that she willingly chose to be part of a relationship where the odds of her ending up dead were obviously high mean that she is not the victim of criminal homicide? Of course not. Her case will be and should be treated as a murder, and the man who beat her to death will be arrested and prosecuted. No one will suggest that the victim is to blame for her own death.
In the case of both drunk driving and domestic violence, it wasn’t so very long ago that our societal views were quite different than they are today. Drunk driving was largely ignored by law enforcement agencies, and cases in which an impaired driver hurt or killed someone were almost never prosecuted. Domestic violence victims were also mostly ignored by local enforcement and prosecutors, and men who beat their wives were rarely arrested or charged.
It took dedicated, outspoken activism to change the cultural conversation around both of these issues, and to insist that law enforcement leaders and prosecutors stop looking the other way when these two particular categories of criminal activity resulted in someone’s death. And now it’s time for those of us who have lost someone we love to drug overdose – and that’s A LOT of us – to get past our shame, be willing to take the public heat, step up, speak out, and strongly advocate on behalf of these voiceless, marginalized crime victims in the same way that early drunk driving and domestic violence activists spoke out.
If it’s determined that the distribution of illegal drugs played a role in Amy Winehouse’s death, then her death was not a mere tragic accident. It wasn’t unintentional. Her drug dealer did not “accidentally” take her money in exchange for drugs, and he (or she) certainly intended for Amy to use the drugs he provided to her – again and again and again. If it’s determined that Amy Winehouse’s death over the weekend was not due to drug overdose, that still leaves approximately 300 Americans and 15 citizens of the UK who DID die of drug overdose during that same 72 hour period.
It’s time to stop assuming that all deaths resulting from what we’ve already clearly designated to be a criminal activity – illegal, profit driven distribution of drugs – are mere accidents in which the dead victim is primarily to blame. And it’s time to stop treating those who die as a result of drug overdose as less worthy of the time, attention and interest that law enforcement and prosecutors give to victims of other types of homicide. When drug dealers kill someone – even if that someone was a drug addict – they must be held accountable.
My thoughts and prayers are with the Winehouse family this week. I hope that yours are as well.
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126 Comments
[...] at Babble this morning, I am thinking out loud about how Amy Winehouse’s family is feeling since receiving the phone [...]
Amy Winehouse, overdose, and a time for advocacy | | mamapunditmamapundit commented on Jul 25 11 at 9:54 am[...] am addressing the need to change our cultural conversation around overdose deaths in something I’ve written at Babble. – kag Tweet This entry was posted in [...]
It’s time to stop blaming the victim in overdose deaths | justice for henry commented on Jul 25 11 at 10:25 am[...] it comes to this thing that tormented Amy Winehouse, and that likely killed her – the same evil thing that seized hold of my own beloved child [...]
Serge Bielanko on Fear, Bees and Amy Winehouse | | mamapunditmamapundit commented on Jul 26 11 at 8:53 pm[...] Gazette (blog)Was the World Powerless to Stop Amy Winehouse?Huffington PostNew Republic -Babble (blog) -CBS Newsall 8,543 news [...]
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» Thinking About Cissy Houston, and All the Other Mothers Who Will Get a Terrible Call Today » mamapundit commented on Feb 17 12 at 9:20 amMonika commented on Jul 25 11 at 10:06 amMy heart breaks for Amy Winehouse, her parents, friends and loved ones.
She had an amazing talent, but unfortunately suffered from a terrible disease.
Yes, it was A DISEASE.
Just as she was born with this rare talent, she was hard-hired for addiction. She did not choose this.
Thank you for this post Katie, because this weekend as I read the cruel comments left on online news stories about Amy Winehouse, I became thoroughly disgusted with the cruel and callous comments made about her.
I truly hope that her death manages to somehow teach those who stubbornly insist it was only down to her choices and her will that drug addiction is first and foremost a disease, and secondly, involves greedy criminals preying on the vulnerable.
C commented on Jul 25 11 at 10:35 amI just wrote a little comment about how much Amy’s death affected me on your blog, it affected me in a way I was really surprised about.
I was mad.
I felt mad that she never got help that “stuck”. And that she wasted her talents. That we all watched as she was clearly out of it, and none of her so-called celebrity friends helped her. I found myself scrubbing the bathroom floor and imagining what I would have said to her to get her off drugs.
All this emotion over someone I didn’t know.
It occurred to me, I was feeling all of this because I have a brother and father who are alcoholics and drug addicts. It hit close to home. I went from feeling angry to feeling so sad. Sad for her and her family, and for myself. Addiction is devastating. I wish there was something I could have done for Amy, and I wish there was something I could do for my brother and father.
It is a disease. And it kills. And breaks my heart everyday. Thanks for this article.
Alive commented on Jul 25 11 at 10:54 amThere are so many people out there that refuse to do drugs and refuse to dip their toes in drinking alcohol or smoking pot just to relax and have a good time, that I’m afraid the disease concept will have a very hard time sticking.
Of course there is fault to lie somewhere. We blame the obese for their lifestyle choices. We hold the smoker responsible for his lung cancer.
Personal choice and the acceptance of an immoral lifestyle has to be addressed.
Lewis Clark commented on Jul 25 11 at 11:22 amWhat a crock of crap! Sgt. Mark A. Bradley,Pvt. Ryan J. Larson,Pfc. Eric D. Soufrine,Staff Sgt. Nicholas P. Bellard,Sgt. Glenn M. Sewell,Lance Cpl. Joshua B. McDaniels,Lance Cpl. Sean M. N. O’Connor,Capt. Michael W. Newton,Lance Cpl. Jason D. Hill. Just a few AMERICANS who had died last week for your freedom. Does your heart drop?
Quit crying for AW. I guess those people that shot off their big toe to avoid the draft had a DISEASE.
Amy Winehouse’s mother and father didn’t get the jokes, but I bet they thought their daughter was somewhat a joke! I’m just sayin’.
Blame a drug dealer? not AW? Why stop there? Let’s blame everything and everyone. Why stop there? Blame the liquor shopkeeper? Blame God?
Murder? You killed her by liking her so much. Just because she made a pleasant sound when you squeezed her. Go buy another one!
I could go on for hours, but what a waste of time. You go on wasting your time on this it might make you feel like you accomplished something.
My thoughts and prayers are with the Winehouse family this week. I hope that yours are as well. A WHOLE WEEK? OK.
C commented on Jul 25 11 at 11:23 amAlive… you don’t know anyone struggling with addiction do you? You have to see it up close and personal to get it, otherwise, its easy to dismiss.
Artemisia commented on Jul 25 11 at 11:39 amKatie,
What an excellent post. As much as there need to be need more – and more effective – rehab programs, we also need to prosecute the people making money off other people’s addictions. And you are right, there is a paradigm change that needs to take place in people’s thinking.
Alive, that’s sadly true, our society is filled with smug mouth-breathers who spend great amounts of time blaming anyone who falls upon bad luck as “deserving it” and giving a pass to big food and cigarette companies and drug dealers and mortgage companies that prey upon people. I suppose it makes them feel better about themselves, but as a Christian, I find that far more immoral than the teenager who experiments with something I wish he wouldn’t and finds himself addicted. Personally, I make my own personal choice to stay away from such people.
Lewis Clark commented on Jul 25 11 at 11:55 amI’m a addicted to CANCER. Now that’s a disease.
Alive commented on Jul 25 11 at 11:58 am@Alive… you don’t know anyone struggling with addiction do you?
As a matter of fact I do, and did.
Absolving people of personal responsibility for their lifestyle choices never helped the first person.
... commented on Jul 25 11 at 11:59 amLewis Clark, you seem to be addicted to getting attention. If you don’t like this article, you should read another one. The internet is pretty big.
($1,000,000 says you own a Charlie Sheen “Winning” shirt. You seem like the type.)
Lewis Clark commented on Jul 25 11 at 11:59 amPersonally, I make my own personal choice to stay away from such people?That’s not very Chistianlike
Jennifer commented on Jul 25 11 at 12:11 pmI didn’t read this post like that at all. I think it’s more of ‘it takes a village.’ No one is saying that the addicted are without fault, well at least I am not. I think the point is that there is more responsibility that needs to be accepted all the way around. Yes, no one actually shoved the drugs/alcohol down their throat. However, someone had to sell them drugs…illegally. That person should also be held responsible. In order to prevent these things, we have to hold all those involved responsible for their part. As human beings we have a responsibility to be kind, treat others with respect, and help when needed. That includes people who have addictions, mental illnesses and disabilities. No one likes to be the butt of jokes or the subject of harsh and unnecessary comments. It is our responsibility to care for others, build them up, not break people down. Am I right in understanding it this way? Is that what was meant?
Me commented on Jul 25 11 at 12:23 pmC – I know several close, immediate family members who struggle with addition and my feelings are very similar to Alive’s. Personal responsibility is a huge issue and I’m afraid many articles I’ve read pertaining to addiction being a disease dismisses it. I think it’s a little bit of both. Even if the overdose victim isn’t entirely to blame (which I disagree with but that’s just me), the victim is primarily to blame. It was a choice. If people want to begin to give so much leeway (not in their right mind, etc.) to addicts and overdose victims, why don’t the dealer themselves get this same leeway? They are typically addicts as well.
Also, I hope people do not sit there and call me a troll, etc. I’ve followed Katie’s personal blog for years now and have never commented because while I may disagree with her view on prosecuting drug dealers for deaths, there are way too many factors involved in the death of her son to address just that one. I just wanted to say my peace that not everyone who disagrees must not know anyone with addiction issues.
kgranju commented on Jul 25 11 at 12:45 pmMe – I appreciate and respect thoughtful debate on this issue. I certainly don’t want to suggest that I expect everyone to agree with my point of view. As far as many factors being part of what led to my son’s death, that’s very often the case when someone is murdered. But the fact that the circumstances may be complex in a crime does not absolve criminal liability for those who broke the law. – Katie
Michelle commented on Jul 25 11 at 12:53 pmWhere does personal responsibility come in to the picture? America has turned into a culture of “blame everybody else” for our actions. An adult is fat–oh, it’s the fast food restaurant’s fault. An adult buys a house they can’t afford–oh, it’s the bank’s fault. An adult takes drugs–oh, it’s the drug dealer’s fault. People make choices and sometimes their choices suck. And sometimes they die as a result of their choices. Cancer is a disease. Diabetes is a disease. MS is a disease. Ask any one of those people whether they chose to have their disease, and the answer is no. As a junkie if they chose to take drugs, and the answer is yes. They chose to. Every morning when we wake up we have a choice–how do I want to live my life. I choose to go to work and be a productive member of society. Some people choose not to. Again, choice.
I am sorry you lost your son, but I do not understand why you continue to absolve him of any responsibility for his actions. He went to rehab. He chose to return to the streets and the drugs. It sucks. I’m sorry.
And yes, I have family that are addicts. In fact, I lost my husband to alcoholism just 4 months ago. Do I blame the liquor store for selling him alcohol? Of course not. He made the choice to drink, his actions caused his death. He could have chosen his family and his daughter and to live. Instead, he chose to drown in a bottle.
And, seriously, you cried about Amy Winehouse’s death? Do you cry over the thousands of children killed in the various wars in Africa every day? How about our soldiers killed around the world? Do you cry for them?
kgranju commented on Jul 25 11 at 1:10 pmMichelle – Yes, I do feel very real pain every time I hear of an American service person being killed or wounded while serving our country. And I don’t think any mother in the world doesn’t sometimes shed tears when she thinks about children elsewhere who are without enough food or shelter.
I am not sure why anyone feels that compassion for someone who dies of a drug overdose would ever mean that I do not also feel compassion for victims of other types of crime, or for parents who suffer when their child commits acrime and is jailed, or for anyone who loses his or her life too soon to another cause.Compassion is not an either/or proposition, nor is justice.
I am so, so sorry about the loss of your husband. I know this must be an incredibly difficult time for you and your children. I hope that you have people around you to give you all the love and support you deserve. Take good care, Katie
Alexander commented on Jul 25 11 at 1:21 pmMy reaction to the news of her death was it was an awful shame that she destroyed her life this way. If it turns out that she died from alcohol instead of opiates – who then do we blame?
kgranju commented on Jul 25 11 at 1:33 pmPlease re-read what I wrote. I am not discussing “blame.” I am discussing fairly applying criminal statutes we have in place to victims of overdose rather than ignoring those crimes. We should not have a system of laws in which law enforcement and prosecutors apply personal bias and discretion in deciding which laws will be upheld and which ones won’t. And that’s what’s happening with regard to victims of overdose. The laws defining drug dealing as a crime already exist. In most states, and in federal criminal statute, the laws defining drug dealing that results in someone’s death as homicide already exist. We either need to repeal these laws because as a society, we have decided via the democratic process that these laws do not reflect what we believe with regard to drug activity, or if we do not repeal them, they should not be actively ignored by those sworn to uphold them.
As for alcohol causing death, as a society, we certainly have defined specific circumstances in which serving someone alcohol is a criminal act, and in providing alcohol that results in someone’s death is a criminal act. These laws also need to be upheld, and they generally are.
Blame is not the same as criminal liability.
Elliesee commented on Jul 25 11 at 1:47 pmI completely agree with you Katie. Amy Winehouse’s talent took my breath away when I finally heard her on tv. I was saddened to only hear about her struggles with alcool and drugs. I always read your blog. I’d like to share this story with you: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Derek_Boogaard
He is a talented hockey player whose young brother is accused of giving him the oxycodone pill that killed him. So sad. It is awful to read the ”things usually said about a person with an addiction” about these two extraordinary people.
an addict commented on Jul 25 11 at 1:50 pmI never comment. But I am a recovering addict, and this struck a cord with me.
I don’t mean to say that no one is responsible in your son’s case, or that you are wasting your time or energy. But I will say this. I have known many addicts to die from this disease. It is a part of life when you are in recovery. It is devastating and horrifyingly sad. But with all the people lost from overdose, I have yet to hear someone blaming the dealer. Personal responsibility IS huge. You might remember that drug dealers (more often than not) are addicts too, suffering from the same disease that your son suffered from. That I suffer from. I am not saying that they are in the right, but addiction is a messed up reality. It IS a life or death disease. I have respect for you, and what you are dealing with, but to be honest (and I don’t mean it cruelly) this article struck me as somewhat ridiculous. I don’t think we should BLAME the addicts who overdose, but I don’t think we need to blame anyone else either.
And btw, I too feel sick when people make jokes about Amy Winehouse. I just don’t feel the need to go track down her dealer and scream at him for murdering her.
kgranju commented on Jul 25 11 at 2:01 pmAA:
Many dealers are indeed addicts. Many are not. Many drunk drivers are alcoholics. Many are not.
But addiction and alcoholism (which are the same thing, different substances) do not offer free passes to commit clearly defined crimes that result in someone else’s death.
If you truly believe that the state and federal criminal laws that clearly and specifically define death resulting from illegal distribution of drugs to be homicide are misguided (or “ridiculous”), then I would encourage you to lobby your state and federal legislators to change those laws. But suggesting that law enforcement and prosecutors should simply ignore certain crime victims because they or you don’t happen to personally agree with the crime defined by an existing law is a very slippery slope. That same line of reasoning is one used by many people to say that when a prostitute is raped, no real crime has been committed against her. – Katie
Ukulelegirl34 commented on Jul 25 11 at 2:12 pmI too get the impression you call someone a troll if they express any disagreement. But here goes. I am not a troll.
I think Amy Winehouse’s parents do not agree that the cause of their daughter’s death was whatever drug dealer or bar owner. They have said nothing at all like this.
Over 80% of addicts quit now as it is. It is strange to suggest something is involuntary when there is that rate of recovery. The majority of addicts quit with no treatment. Additionally, recovered addicts do not recommend these changes you are advocating.
You are also conflating cases where a person dies from their first use of drugs with cases of an addict overdosing from one of many habitual doses.
If the efforts you are recommending get followed, people will get their drugs from more dangerous people than they do currently, and they will be killed just for sport.
There is a huge amount of discretion built into being a prosecutor. It sounds as if you think that prosecutor’s pledge to apply any law at any time (let alone Federal guidelines for crime that the public is barely aware of, and that are undergoing constitutional review).
Seriously, I am not a troll. I just don’t see your view as at all convincing. The idea that we should all support efforts for vaccines for addiction (we are very, very close to this, and I might even say they exist now) is a straightforward solution.
Other countries have tougher drug laws, and they have no less (or more) of a rate of opiate addiction.
I am not a troll.
Cath Young commented on Jul 25 11 at 2:19 pmI certainly agree that drug dealers/providers should be prosecuted when they can be identified as the ones who have provided the drugs. In fact, no death or OD is necessary to bust dealers, and they are busted and punished regularly when the authorities have sufficient evidence to do so. Our drug laws are set so that the penalties are far more severe for those dealing in the drugs than those who have a personal dose amount in their possession. In fact, unless someone who is doped up is driving or doing something else that endangers self and others, the chances of them being prosecuted for having illegal drugs in their bodies is small. So, yes, the laws are there to harshly to go after those who deal in drugs, and much of the war on drugs is against the dealers.
The problem is that it is difficult and often impossible to link the drugs to the dealers. In the cases where prosecution was successful, there is admissable proof. Sometimes the drug provider admits providing the drugs, particuarly the amateurs. Most of those who are savvy do not. We have a legal system that presumes innocence until proven guilty and the burden of proof is a heavy on. Many drug addicts who OD take a medley of drugs from many sources and are drug dealers themselves. Trying to track down who gave whom what and from where is often a futile endeavor.
Though the system can and has gone after the bar tender or host that has served a drunk way too much, who then goes off and drives, or serves an unde raged customer, unless the chain of who provided what can be traced, the blame for inebriation and its consequences are placed squarely on the shoulders of the drunk, not the provider of the drink. And so it should be with drugs.
I agree with you, Katie, but I am far more pragmatic in terms of proof and admissable evidence. For the police to go after citizens without reasonable proof that will hold up in a court is tantamount to harrassment and it happens too much in this country. We jail more citizens than any other country in the world. These days, it ‘s unusual for a young adult not to have a substance abuse arrest on his/her record. It’s not a lack of vigilance that this has occurred, and yet the number of incidents are rising.
The bottom line is that there has to be personal responsibility in these things. Those who are sick have to get treatment for their illnesses, and if they choose not to do so, they can be criminally charged for any laws they break and harm they cause due to what their illnesses compel to do This is the way it works.
A drug addict who ODs is responsible for taking those illegal drgs and if s/he survives the ordeal s/he should be compelled to be criminally charged for this and questioned as to who provided those drugs. You have seen first hand how that plays out. The doctors and families enable these druggies to right back to where they were, and deliberately avoid any law enforcement intervention.This year, a friend of Henry’s ended up in the hospital ODed. I’ll bet a lot that the mom would have been right at your side, had the kid died. The family would be calling for the heads of those who gave that kid the drugs. But, the kid survived, and the doctors, parents and kid wanted nothing to do with the police being involved in the case and went through the trouble of deliberately keeping them out. And, you out of respect for the family’s wishes, concurred. Perfect time to have gotten some names of who provided that kid with those drugs and gotten some dealers off the street. The kid could have used some legal intervention in his life too, but everyone is too afraid of what it would do to his record. This is typical of how it works.
Law enforcement does go after those who provide drugs and the penalties for these dealers is far harsher than for those who take them. Getting sufficient proof is the problem here.
Ukulelegirl34 commented on Jul 25 11 at 2:22 pmI also very much disagree that it is beholden upon the public to get laws that charge dealers with homicide removed, if we disagree with you. Prosecutors can be trusted to bring charges on these laws when appropriate, and sometimes it is appropriate. It just seems very sad to blame addiction on the dealer.
This won’t help us solve addiction at all.
Alexander commented on Jul 25 11 at 2:24 pmYou say you are addressing “criminal liability” and not blame – but look at the title of your article. And your example of the woman who stays in an abusive relationship. You are discussing blame. You don’t want addicts to be blamed.
You are right that there are laws and that criminal responsibility lies with the drug dealer. But does that mean people who go to the drug dealers have no responsibility? I think your article does touch on both criminal liability and blame. It can be hard to separate the two in more casual modes of communication. However you are right that in a court room – the two should not be considered the same.
Ukulelegirl34 commented on Jul 25 11 at 2:27 pmWonderful point, Cath Young. We could just imprison the drug users for their use (not their dealing). Those laws are already on the books, and have been on a lot longer. Also the public knows about those laws. Why isn’t this the call?
Amy commented on Jul 25 11 at 3:39 pmThe problem with both of your metaphorical comparisons is that the drug dealer is not really analagous to either the abusive husband or the drunk driver. In an overdose death of an addict, the DRUG is the abusive husband, the dealer is not the abusive husband. So yeah, blame the husband, obviously. And blame the drug. And prosecute the dealers for selling illegal drugs, absolutely. I just can’t make the leap to believing that every person who sells OR GIVES illegal drugs to another person is a killer. I say “gives” because in some of the examples of cases where people have been prosecuted in overdose cases (that you link to on your website), the person being prosecuted is not the dealer – it might be the boyfriend who actually went to the dealer’s house and bough the drug and brought it home to the girlfriend who overdosed. That boyfriend wasn’t targeting his girlfriend in order to prey on her and profit from her, was he? I don’t think so.
I’ve read about your son’s case a lot on your site, and I do believe that in that specific case, the people who were with him on the night that he overdosed are guilty of not helping him. But it just seems to me that you are ignoring a lot of gray area that exists here. For one thing, the line between “drug dealer” and “drug user” is often quite blurry. For another, everyone who dies of a drug overdose is not a victim of the disease of addiction (because everyone who tries or uses drug is not automatically an addict).
David commented on Jul 25 11 at 3:54 pmKatie,
Calling for more criminal arrests is not the sensitive or prudent response to Amy Winehouse’s death.
Your arguments adamantly endorsing failed drug policy put many people directly at risk. Overdose victims will not get medical help when society’s only response is arrest and prosecution. Struggling addicts like Henry will continue to suffer and die, loving families will be devastated by tragedy like yours. Not to mention the opportunities we lose devoting our resources to law enforcement over education, treatment, and health care.
Can you really argue that we don’t pursue drug dealers? We commit billions of dollars a year prosecuting people for possession and distribution, making little long term impact on drug use, harm and death. You, in fact, argue that the situation is worsening. Continuing the same strategy will only produce more of the same result – isolation, danger, prison, lack of treatment for addicts, and stigma, misunderstanding for families, and enormous amounts of violence in the US and abroad. “15,273 people were killed in 2010″ in Mexico according to Wikipedia.
For a very different approach look at Portugal’s recent success:
http://www.foxnews.com/world/2010/12/26/portugals-drug-policy-pays-eyes-lessons/The laws you approve of are mistaken, and should be rewritten. The two analogies you use are unconvincing – the relationships (driver/victim, abuser/spouse, addict/supplier) are so completely different it does a disservice to all three to compare them.
Good news in NY today with an approach contrary to your own. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/gabriel-sayegh/good-samaritan-911_b_907779.html
I encourage you to use your powerful voice and large audience to call for more rational and humane drug policy.
I make no comment on your son’s case and your heroic effort to pursue the truth. I pray that you may find comfort in your loss.
geri a commented on Jul 25 11 at 4:02 pm@ukulelegirl34 – where did you get the statistic that over 80% of addicts get clean, and with no recovery?
Meri Levy commented on Jul 25 11 at 4:09 pm@U: The statistic you cited does not ring true for me. In my graduate studies in psychology, we were told that approximately 15% of addicts admit their addiction, 15% of those seek treatment, and 15% of those manage to overcome their addiction. Don’t know how accurate those statistics are, but they sure don’t bear any relation to yours.
Katherine commented on Jul 25 11 at 4:16 pmMy brother is a addicted to crack. Jailed, once again, for his choices. This time, three years in prison. He has been clean so many times, and made the choice not to reach out to his family who wants to help him at his moments of weakness, but to the same crowd of drug addicts and dealers. It is not the dealer’s fault my brother does crack. That is like blaming the tobacco companies because I made the choice to smoke for 20 years of my life. My brother clearly made the choice to live this kind of life. Just as I clearly made the choice to walk into the store and buy a pack of cigarettes every day, until one day, I decided to put my health and my family first. My brother and Amy did not make the choice to put anything ahead of their addiction. Giving in to addiction is simply selfishness magnified. Hopefully, after my brother gets out of prison, he will put his family and health first before will before we find him dead, too. We have a problem in this country of wanting to blame everyone else and not take responsibility for anything. Why are you perpetuating that problem with posts like this? People are responsible for their choices whether they are weak or not, whether they make good choices or not. If I die of lung cancer from smoking, that was all me. Just like when I got melanoma, that was all me. I rubbed baby oil on my body in high school and baked in the sun for hours. I could blame Johnson & Johnson for making the baby oil, or the sun for burning me. The victim thing is a pathetic cope out. Consider this, what if the addict has the “disease” of pedophilia instead of drugs? By your argument you couldn’t blame a pedophile if a pimp brought a 13 year old to them that was going to satisfy their addiction? By your argument … you are saying the pedophile is sick, that we can’t blame them for bad choices, it is the pimp’s fault. Whatever. Hell yes, we’d blame the pedophile. We would not say, “Poor victim, Pedophile. He’s sick and we can’t blame him for breaking the law and touching a little kid wrong. The pimp was waving it in his face.” No, he called the pimp. The drug addict called their dealer. Yes, sick. Excusable, NO! My brother made the choice, his senior year in high school, to blow his 4.0+ GPA and full-ride scholarship to a university by making a choice to pick cocaine over his future, over and over again, until he was addicted. Then he went from snorting powder to smoking rock. These were all choices. He went from using to dealing to pay for his habit. It is a typical progression. So, to say a dealer is at fault, calling drug addiction a “disease” and not being able to blame the addict for ODing because they have a disease and is another faulty argument. There is no logic behind it. Most the time, the dealer has the “disease” of drug addiction, too. By your argument, he shouldn’t be held responsible because he is also sick. It is simply a game of dominoes. One addict feed the addiction of others. So who do you blame, now? My brother wrote me from prison and told me he made stupid choices and was paying for them. He told me I should be disappointed in him. And I AM. He has had break after break in his life and could never decide to do the right thing. It finally caught up to him. Not in the way it did Amy Winehouse … but her daddy wanted her to go to rehab and she said “No,no, no.” She didn’t want to be well or she would have made the right choice, and after she got out of rehab, when she finally did go, she had choices to make. Obviously, she made the wrong one … for the last time. Tragic, but true.
Jane Doe commented on Jul 25 11 at 4:21 pmI can’t believe I just read this. It is classic codependency to think that if you can manipulate the environment of an addict, then they will change. Providing fuel for addicts to continue why they continue to use will also kill addicts. Perhaps enablers should be jailed as well? They killed the addict every bit as much as the dealer.
Ukulelegirl34 commented on Jul 25 11 at 4:46 pmGeri A it is is very commonly cited number, replicated in various studies and repeated in lots of sources. I think the first time it was learned was from a very careful government study done on the soldiers in Vietnam who did heroin, the addictions got very serious (they distinguished between 55% of mere heavy users and the 45% who were true addicts), and the Nixon administration monitored the addicts once they got back. Back in the US, only 12 per cent continued their addiction.
You could also consult the people who work monitoring pilots or medical clinicians who get addicted. They get subjected to testing or they will lose their license, and recovery rates are well above 80%.
That most of these people recover without treatment is another stat that any good addiction research will have from many places.
I don’t mind it being called a “disease,” since this means something very loose in the medical community (more akin to any malady), but the actual brain science being done certainly does not refute the idea that addicts mostly recover. One contemporary researcher has put it this way “when they stakes are high enough, every addict can quit.” I don’t know the source of that quote, since I read heavily in the field, but I could also give you references for general reading in addiction, and perhaps some contact numbers for people who monitor recovery in credentialed professions.
geri a commented on Jul 25 11 at 4:47 pmI wish you the very best on your advocacy and activism to change the cultural conversation on this issue. It has affected me and my family deeply also. But I just do not have it in me, and I’m guessing you may not understand this, to “take the public heat, step up, speak out and strongly advocate”. I do hear what you are saying, and I know that you strongly feel, even know, that more could have been in prosecuting Henry’s case. We live in a country where all people are created equal, at least theoretically speaking, but the sad truth is we don’t necessarily honor that, and many don’t even believe it. And you are correct, the laws are there. I am sure if this hadn’t hit you so personally you would not be advocating so strongly, of course not, we take up the causes that deeply affect us, that is our nature. But at my age, where I am in my life, and after living with this effects of this illness and watching it destroy two people I deeply loved, I don’t have the energy to take up a cause. Godspeed to you and your fellow advocates. I wish the very best for you. @an addict – I appreciate your sharing here. When I started reading the comments, I was hoping someone who was an addict would weigh in. Your comments reminded me of what our son would say to me when he was in recovery, before he relapsed, OD’d and died, “this isn’t your or dad’s fault mom, it isn’t the fault of the person I got the drugs from, it isn’t even my fault that I got this. But it is my responsibility to manage it.” and for a while, he did. God bless you, our sweet, sweet Nick. Sleep well. I sure hope and pray we’ll meet again.
geri a commented on Jul 25 11 at 4:51 pm@ukulele – thanks for responding. i have done lots of research, reading, etc. during the 10 years our son struggled with his addiction, before he died, and I had never heard anything like that before. it really caught my attention. again, thanks for answering.
kgranju commented on Jul 25 11 at 5:02 pmGeri – Everyone has a different path in dealing with the horrible blow that both you and I have been dealt. I want you to know how much your kind and supportive comments have meant to me over the past year as I’ve faced this grief that only another parent who has been through it can understand. In reaching out to me, and in talking openly about Nick, his struggles and the loss your family has faced, you HAVE stepped up and spoken out. You’ve been a shining beacon for me, and I am sure for so many other moms who read your thoughtful online discussion about addiction. Take care – Katie
Terri C commented on Jul 25 11 at 5:08 pmYou know, the problems with the logic of placing the responsibility of the overdose solely on the “dealer,” as if the “dealer” is somehow a completely different category of human being than the purchaser, are many and deep. The fact that laws are in place does not mean that these laws are either sane or uncontested. If I sell you a bicycle that, in actual fact, I stole, and you take the bicycle out and ride in front of a train and die, am I guilty of murder? No, I am not, even if I AM guilty of stealing the bicycle and selling it to you. I think that focusing on “the dealer” is really not going to solve things, because at heart that focus is one that does not “get” addiction. If I have addiction and I am actively using, I will get my alcohol and/or drugs any way I can, and no matter if it is legal or illegal that continued use will destroy my body and my life. You will not solve the problem of overdose by removing all “dealers” from the streets or by legalizing drugs or by separating those who die of this disease into “innocent victims” who obtained their substance from “dealers” and “some other category” who obtained their substances in legal ways. I really think you are setting up a false dichotomy and, while it may be comforting to believe your loved one would be alive and home with you and well if not for some “bad people,” that simply is not reflective of how addiction works. And, so you know, I am not a troll. I am someone who also has loved and lost people with addiction, and someone whose life is forever marked by this, as I know yours is. At some point I really think you must understand that your son remained, despite his severe illness, a moral agent, and that he chose repeatedly, up until his death by your own account, not to treat his illness, and I really think you must incorporate that understanding, on an emotional and spiritual level, into your whole picture of his much-too-short life and his tragic death. Please, please read what Russell Brand has written about the death of his friend, Amy Winehouse.
And PS, I don’t think 80% of persons with severe addictive disease recover.
David commented on Jul 25 11 at 5:44 pm@meri levy. If I understand you correctly, of 100 addicts, 15 of them admit their addiction, 2.25 of them seek treatment, and .337 of them manage to overcome their addiction. Those numbers ring loudly false. What is the outcome of the 99.663 people who don’t succeed? And what policies can we employ in the face of such a grim prognosis?
Opus commented on Jul 25 11 at 5:56 pmI feel very sorry for the family of Amy Winehouse. I am not familiar with her music. The only way I know of her is because of her drug/legal problems. It’s always sad when someone dies at a young age or suddenly, whatever the reason. That being said, my first (and I’ll admit it) callous thought when I read the news was “Good. Now we won’t have to hear about all of her crazy antics anymore.” I spent some time looking at that and trying to feel some sympathy for her. I’m not sure why it isn’t happening for me. Maybe because she’s a celebrity. I’m still not sure. I do know that I feel for her family. I’m not blaming her for anything because we have no idea what caused her death – everyone’s assuming it was an overdose, but that may not be the case. Sometimes people just die. So I’m really not being hard on her, I just don’t feel too badly for her either. I’ll go back to my corner and continue sorting this out.
harriet commented on Jul 25 11 at 6:17 pmIf you choose to make your life and your struggles public, then you will get the bad and the good reactions from the public. You can’t pick and choose. You will get the adulation and the money from fans and the cruel jokes as well. If you don’t want the cruel jokes, don’t become a performer. Alternatively, don’t blog about your family’s private life if you don’t want honest feedback that disagrees with you.
I don’t think your son was murdered. There, I said it. I’m sorry that he’s dead–I have a teenage son myself–and I’ve loved addicts. I can’t even imagine the pain you’re going through. But he chose to take those drugs that killed him and he wasn’t murdered.
Also–my sister in law is married to a man who beats her. She won’t leave him. After a while, you start to wonder what she gets out of the relationship. I don’t think she’s an innocent victim of abuse the way an abused child would be. My sister in law could leave her husband at any time–everyone in the family has offered many times to help–but she won’t.
At some point, personal responsibility for one’s own life has to be accounted for.
Michelle commented on Jul 25 11 at 6:31 pm@Katherine, your analogy to a pedophile really hits home. You are correct, we wouldn’t be saying “poor pedophile.” Just as we shouldn’t be saying “poor addict.” I feel bad for Katie and her family and Amy Winehouse’s family and the family of all addicts. But, the choice to take drugs is a choice, from the first time they use until they die or recover, every use is a choice.
Katie, thank you for your kind words about my husband. And I am sorry for the death of your son. While I don’t agree with your philosophy, I do feel for you and your family.
Monika commented on Jul 25 11 at 6:37 pm@Ugrl — Can you provide actual sources?
From what I have read in the past year, generally drug use declines over time. If addicts make it to middle age, their drug use often becomes manageable or ceases to be as intense on addiction. The key of course, is that the individual must make it to middle age. Never did see stats though, on the % of drug users who recover in middle age.
The stats that I have seen indicate that AA and NA have a success rate around 5%, and in-house treatment programs around 15% (the very best ones may lay claim to 25%).
Substitution therapy (such as methadone), has a higher success rate, especially in combination with other therapies. Although I don’t remember the success rate, it was no where near 80%.
I would really need to see the studies and research papers you refer to, because such claims defy belief.
Ukulelegirl34 commented on Jul 25 11 at 6:40 pmThanks, Geri A.
I’ve been talking about how this article bothered me, and spoke to some recovered addicts. They were angry, like the ones above. One pointed out that addiction can get you to do anything for drugs, and explained that the violence in drug stores in order to steal pills is a case in point. Without access to “dealers” believe it or not- you find medical professionals who are addicts committing more crime.This just seems like such an irresponsible article, irresponsible when it comes to what a prosecutor’s job is in relation to the law, irresponsible when it comes to the focus put on the dealer and off the addict- and irresponsible to not interview one of the authors of the many, many new brain studies on addiction. To spread such a bad idea is such a shame when there is so much more about addiction that we’ve learned in recent years.
It cannot be reiterated enough: drug dealers do not cause addiction. I think the writer just believes so deeply that addiction is something to be ashamed of (paradoxically), that she is trying this angle of “it is the dealers doing this” without talking to addicts about whether this is true.
Again, why isn’t a tribute to Amy Winehouse one that recommends something that would help her (not have caused her to rob pharmacies when she was an opiate addict) — a vaccine.
Pepe commented on Jul 25 11 at 6:49 pmKatie, because I read your blog and have been following your story, I was actually able to feel something human and compassionate when I read of Amy Winehouse’s death. A year ago, I would have said or thought something ugly, something dismissive of her life and death simply because she was an addict. But because you have shared your story, I am able to see the loss of a beautiful human being, a beloved daughter and friend, from this earth forever. I now see those who are quick to show venom and anger and hate toward someone who has died as hurting themselves, probably misplacing emotions, and as having a lot of growing to do.
Nina commented on Jul 25 11 at 6:51 pm@Katherine, I don’t think Katie is saying the victim bears no responsibility. I think she is saying that our legal system should go after the drug dealers in the same way that we would certainly after the pimp in your analogy.
Ukulelegirl34 commented on Jul 25 11 at 6:51 pmMonkia, it is a shame such easily found stats defy belief. That is why when people write on addiction they should probably interview some researchers. We have no, or terrible, common sense on the topic. You are citing the success rates of treatment programs, which are abysmal (a testament to how badly we need scientists to help us with addiction). As I already mentioned, most addicts recover on their own.
Why wouldn’t you google with the information I already provided and find the data and researchers yourself, by googling? You could also use the Social Sciences Citation Index (SSCI) and look for the recent research, and one new book, from the top researchers in various fields, “What is Addiction?” is even free on google books.
Ukulelegirl34 commented on Jul 25 11 at 6:53 pmNina, if that would work, why don’t countries that have stronger more punitive sentences for drug dealing be better off?
Ukulelegirl34 commented on Jul 25 11 at 6:57 pmHere are the countries with drug penalties that would be praised, I suppose?
http://goseasia.about.com/od/travelplanning/a/seasia_drugs.htm
Mills commented on Jul 25 11 at 6:59 pmKatie, I completely agree that we need to stop marginalizing and punishing drug addicts, but I disagree with you on certain key points:
1. Your focus on drug dealers ignores the fact that a substantial percentage of low level dealers are addicts themselves who deal in order to support their addiction. Others come from the kind of backgrounds where employment and education opportunities are limited and dealing is often seen as the only opportunity to make any kind of income.
2. Imprisoning a greater number of Americans as part of the war on drugs has not discernibly changed the drug culture or affected rates of addiction. Instead it has led to the incarceration of over 2 million (the largest prison population in the world), mostly minority, men and women, which has had a devastating impact on their communities, leading to exactly the kind of negative social consequences that make the next generation even more likely to resort to drug abuse and sale.
3.When drugs are illegal they are unregulated, making them less safe then they could be, and put them in the hands of exactly the kind of people that would assault a vulnerable child and not call 911. Criminalizing drugs ensure that the dealers that addicts buy them from are criminals. Putting drug dealers in jail just opens up space for new dealers. Dealers do not create the market demand, addicts do. When drugs are illegal the market becomes a very dangerous place for an addict to be. We should legalize, regulate, tax heavily, and use the profits for drug education.
4. Re your comparison to DV advocacy, strict mandatory arrest and no-drop policies have led to the kind of discretionless law enforcement that in some cases punishes the victim as well as the abuser, and makes them less likely to call the police the next time.
Food for thought.
Jen commented on Jul 25 11 at 7:00 pmAmy Winehouse’s death is a tragedy. I leave it to those who understand the processes of addiction, the decriminalization versus criminal prosecution debate, and the legal process to suggest how such tragedies can be prevented. All I know is that addiction is a horrible problem, with consequences far beyond those directly affected. I’m angry that we haven’t figured out how to deal with it more effectively. Two of my best friends have brothers who are heroin addicts. One of those brothers died, and his brother was somehow (and fortunately) shocked into sobriety. The other friend’s brother is in and out of rehab, causing him, her, and all who love him great distress. It is true that cutting off the supply (by eliminating the source of drugs) would certainly make it harder to get the drugs, but it does seem like more is at play in his addiction. I just wish there were something straightforward that could be done in these situations — that would save the lives of those suffering, and save the hearts of their families.
Monika commented on Jul 25 11 at 7:03 pmFunny how forgiving people are when it is some other sort of chronic diseases…
For example, 30%-50% of diabetes patients relapse, failing to maintain their diet and medication schedules.
It’s even worse for hypertension and asthma, which have relapse rates of 50%-70%.
But in our society, drug addicts merit the most judgmental condemnations, and are just weak-willed failures.
Contrast this attitude with that of Portugal, which puts addicts in medical (and perhaps cognitive) treatment (doesn’t judge, doesn’t condemn, and doesn’t throw them in jail), and vigorously pursues dealers and distributors. They claim to have reduced the number of addicts by 50% with this 2-pronged approach.
Even Portugal, the only country which has decriminalized drug use, recognizes that it is important to go after drug dealers. Drug dealers prey on vulnerable people, getting them dependent, and keeping them that way. Although many times the drug addict willingly takes the drug, the dealer is illegally distributing controlled chemical substances which are potentially lethal. Make no mistake about it — Amy Winehouse was preyed upon by many who had a vested interest in her continued drug abuse. And Henry too.
Monika commented on Jul 25 11 at 7:07 pm@Ukegrl –
“Why wouldn’t you google with the information I already provided and find the data and researchers yourself, by googling? ”
Why? Because YOU made the claim, and should be backing it up with the citations you used.
Leah commented on Jul 25 11 at 7:25 pmI truly think Henry’s death and Amy Winehouse’s death are tragic. I absolutely believe that the people who distributed the drugs should be prosecuted. When the laws are already on the books it’s truly disturbing that that’s not happening.
I don’t think drug addicts are completely blameless. (If we don’t hold addicts at all responsible for their behavior, in a legal and moral sense, then it seems to me we wouldn’t be able to hold them accountable for selling drugs to others.) But that doesn’t mean that when others hurt them in a manner that is illegal that they should be discriminated against and not given equal protection under the law. That’s just wrong.
Opus commented on Jul 25 11 at 7:35 pmI’m still thinking. In this country, we have a strong ethic of “If you try hard enough, you can do it.” The implication is that if you can’t do it, you aren’t trying hard enough. So if you become addicted and can’t stop, you are weak and if you would just work harder at it you could quit. Now we all know that addiction doesn’t work like that and many other problems in life don’t either. But the attitude is still there under the surface. I see it sometimes in “christians” who pray for healing and, if healing doesn’t come say “Your faith isn’t strong enough; you didn’t pray correctly, long enough, at the right church. . whatever” I had a friend who was mentally ill and really thought that if he did this or that and really tried super super hard, he could beat it. Everything he tried worked for maybe a few weeks, but the effort was too much – it’s all-consuming and you can’t do anything else. It’s not sustainable. Sometimes things just can’t be beat. Probably more often that we’d like to admit.
Ukulelegirl34 commented on Jul 25 11 at 7:35 pmMonika, I would expect the author to have included citations, not a commentator. I am not sure why I would be concerned that you know nothing about addiction, either.
If you won’t even google to see for yourself- which is the best way to do these thing, well, then I just can’t imagine you are likely to find out much, either. But I guess, start with the book I mentioned? You will have to google it. It will have dozens of pages of citations. I guess find confirmation by going through those?
By the way, some of the commentators above made really great points about the poor analogies in the article.
geri a commented on Jul 25 11 at 7:38 pmthanks katie. it is nice to hear that even though i can’t do much advocacy or anything public, my words may in some way touch someone. And I do want to reiterate that I have never thought that katie is saying Henry had no responsibility for his actions, I am not quite sure how people get to that. I read this as her saying that there are laws to prosecute dealers, and that it isn’t up to the prosecutor or sheriff’s dept. to decide not to do that if they don’t agree with the law.
lauren commented on Jul 25 11 at 9:22 pmkatie, i have been following Henry’s Story for awhile now, and I have to say that this article really helped to put some perspective on this for me.
I think some comments fail to see the part about dealers who PREY on these victims. While there is some personal choice and responsibility, most people who OD are stripped of that, by their addiction. And addiction IS a disease. People who are desperate, who physically need drugs due to their addiction, are easily preyed upon and are not thinking clearly. They obviously would not CHOOSE that lifestyle, but they feel without a choice. How can we, as human beings, not stand up for those who cannot stand up for themselves?
heidi commented on Jul 25 11 at 9:23 pmIt’s not that Katie comes right out and says Henry had no responsibility. It’s what she leaves out. Henry was not a child. He was a young adult with the responsibility of managing an addiction. He did not succeed with his treatment and for that society puts some of the blame on him, and that hurts.
JP commented on Jul 25 11 at 9:43 pmWe accept that anorexic women are victims of a disease and need help. We accept that women who return to abusive relationships over and over are victims of abuse and need help. We accept that cigarette smokers are caught in a cycle of addiction and need help. We accept that people who attempt suicide are suffering from poor mental health and need help. We have AA meetings to support people who can’t resist a drink. But if you use illegal drugs, sorry, you deserve what’s coming to you. Is this really what our society has been reduced to?
Rachel Sigler commented on Jul 25 11 at 9:52 pmMy thoughts and prayers have been with them since i heard the news. I prayed that their daughter is in heaven at peace with our Lord. I have found so many people being heartless in my opinion in regards to a death of a young woman who died so young. Someone that you and i may not have known but we are all human and i believe we all have the ability to show compassion and also respect for one another regardless. Just because of the way she died doesn’t mean she deserved to die. Amy was obviously a troubled soul who had many problems and no one will ever know what she was truly going through.
leslie commented on Jul 25 11 at 9:57 pmYes. The dealer is responsible. But so is Amy W. They both played a major role in her death. Amy was a living, breathing organism who made a CHOICE to take the first drink, the first hit or whatever. And I am pretty sure she made the second and third. Anyone who grows up in these times knows how dangerous drugs and drink can be.. and how addictive. Her original actions were her choice, not forced upon her. No one can make you do something that is not your choice. We are born with the ability to choose from options given to us. She began driving the road she was on. She may not have been able to get herself off of that road but she did choose that road initially. She is not an innocent in this. Not everyone is a victim. It is a terrible shame.
R commented on Jul 25 11 at 10:03 pmRussell Brand absolutely agrees with your approach.He has some experience with addiction. Here is his statement on the death of Amy W.
#################################################Russell Brand’s tribute: ‘For Amy’
When you love someone who suffers from the disease of addiction you await the phone call. There will be a phone call. The sincere hope is that the call will be from the addict themselves, telling you they’ve had enough, that they’re ready to stop, ready to try something new. Of course though, you fear the other call, the sad nocturnal chime from a friend or relative telling you it’s too late, she’s gone.Frustratingly it’s not a call you can ever make it must be received. It is impossible to intervene.
I’ve known Amy Winehouse for years. When I first met her around Camden she was just some twit in a pink satin jacket shuffling round bars with mutual friends, most of whom were in cool Indie bands or peripheral Camden figures Withnail-ing their way through life on impotent charisma. Carl Barrat told me that “Winehouse” (which I usually called her and got a kick out of cos it’s kind of funny to call a girl by her surname) was a jazz singer, which struck me as a bizarrely anomalous in that crowd. To me with my limited musical knowledge this information placed Amy beyond an invisible boundary of relevance; “Jazz singer? She must be some kind of eccentric” I thought. I chatted to her anyway though, she was after all, a girl, and she was sweet and peculiar but most of all vulnerable.
I was myself at that time barely out of rehab and was thirstily seeking less complicated women so I barely reflected on the now glaringly obvious fact that Winehouse and I shared an affliction, the disease of addiction. All addicts, regardless of the substance or their social status share a consistent and obvious symptom; they’re not quite present when you talk to them. They communicate to you through a barely discernible but un-ignorable veil. Whether a homeless smack head troubling you for 50p for a cup of tea or a coked-up, pinstriped exec foaming off about his “speedboat” there is a toxic aura that prevents connection. They have about them the air of elsewhere, that they’re looking through you to somewhere else they’d rather be. And of course they are. The priority of any addict is to anaesthetise the pain of living to ease the passage of the day with some purchased relief.
From time to time I’d bump into Amy she had good banter so we could chat a bit and have a laugh, she was “a character” but that world was riddled with half cut, doped up chancers, I was one of them, even in early recovery I was kept afloat only by clinging to the bodies of strangers so Winehouse, but for her gentle quirks didn’t especially register.
Then she became massively famous and I was pleased to see her acknowledged but mostly baffled because I’d not experienced her work and this not being the 1950’s I wondered how a “jazz singer” had achieved such cultural prominence. I wasn’t curious enough to do anything so extreme as listen to her music or go to one of her gigs, I was becoming famous myself at the time and that was an all consuming experience. It was only by chance that I attended a Paul Weller gig at the Roundhouse that I ever saw her live.
Close friends: Russell knew Amy before she was famous and has written a touching tribute to her. Pictured her at the Q Awards in 2006
I arrived late and as I made my way to the audience through the plastic smiles and plastic cups I heard the rolling, wondrous resonance of a female vocal. Entering the space I saw Amy on stage with Weller and his band; and then the awe. The awe that envelops when witnessing a genius. From her oddly dainty presence that voice, a voice that seemed not to come from her but from somewhere beyond even Billie and Ella, from the font of all greatness. A voice that was filled with such power and pain that it was at once entirely human yet laced with the divine. My ears, my mouth, my heart and mind all instantly opened. Winehouse. Winehouse? Winehouse! That twerp, all eyeliner and lager dithering up Chalk Farm Road under a back-combed barnet, the lips that I’d only seen clenching a fishwife fag and dribbling curses now a portal for this holy sound. So now I knew. She wasn’t just some hapless wannabe, yet another p***ed up nit who was never gonna make it, nor was she even a ten-a-penny-chanteuse enjoying her fifteen minutes. She was a f****** genius.Shallow fool that I am I now regarded her in a different light, the light that blazed down from heaven when she sang. That lit her up now and a new phase in our friendship began. She came on a few of my TV and radio shows, I still saw her about but now attended to her with a little more interest. Publicly though, Amy increasingly became defined by her addiction. Our media though is more interested in tragedy than talent, so the ink began to defect from praising her gift to chronicling her downfall. The destructive personal relationships, the blood soaked ballet slippers, the aborted shows, that youtube madness with the baby mice. In the public perception this ephemeral tittle-tattle replaced her timeless talent. This and her manner in our occasional meetings brought home to me the severity of her condition. Addiction is a serious disease; it will end with jail, mental institutions or death. I was 27 years old when through the friendship and help of Chip Somers of the treatment centre, Focus12 I found recovery, through Focus I was introduced to support fellowships for alcoholics and drug addicts which are very easy to find and open to anybody with a desire to stop drinking and without which I would not be alive.
Now Amy Winehouse is dead, like many others whose unnecessary deaths have been retrospectively romanticised, at 27 years old. Whether this tragedy was preventable or not is now irrelevant. It is not preventable today. We have lost a beautiful and talented woman to this disease. Not all addicts have Amy’s incredible talent. Or Kurt’s or Jimi’s or Janis’s, some people just get the affliction. All we can do is adapt the way we view this condition, not as a crime or a romantic affectation but as a disease that will kill. We need to review the way society treats addicts, not as criminals but as sick people in need of care. We need to look at the way our government funds rehabilitation. It is cheaper to rehabilitate an addict than to send them to prison, so criminalisation doesn’t even make economic sense. Not all of us know someone with the incredible talent that Amy had but we all know drunks and junkies and they all need help and the help is out there. All they have to do is pick up the phone and make the call. Or not. Either way, there will be a phone call.
mellou commented on Jul 25 11 at 10:53 pmI really hoped she would get better and find her second chance through her music. The media loves a circus (Amy, Charlie Sheen, Britney in her head shaving days) and seem to forget (or just plain not care) that these are real people who deserve some dignity and respect. Maybe their choices weren’t the greatest and were on display for everyone to see (how many people out there have their own closet addictions/vices/struggles?)…but why, for once, can’t we send our well wishes that these people would get healthy? Thanks for the read. Appreciate the article.
DE commented on Jul 25 11 at 11:17 pmI don’t believe it’s anyone’s fault but her own. She went to the drug dealer looking for drugs, you seriously expect a dealer to have a moral epiphany every time some skinny crack whore solicits them? She was given every opportunity to clean up her act and she said “no, no, no”, and I have no sympathy for the stupid.
She and everyone else in the world know from like 4th grade on what the risks of drug use are. She’s dead because of her own stupidity, her parents may be grieving for their loss but at least she can’t make them suffer further by being such a royal f*ck up.
JanAtty commented on Jul 26 11 at 12:09 amI happen to agree with the laws that define drug dealing that results in someone’s death as a type of criminal homicide but those of you who do not should be working to change the laws rather than denying that the laws exist or offering support for a local sherriff who has apparently decided that since he doesn’t agree that these criminal statutes should exist he will simply act as if they don’t. It’s easy to offer all kind of opinions about which victims do or don’t deserve equal protection under the law when the victims in question aren’t your loved ones.
We have a system that allows citizens to actively work to bring laws onto the books and work to have laws removed from the books. Thankfully we do not live in some type of banana republic with a system that allows the police to pick and choose which criminal statutes they feel like upholding. That’s a very dangerous precedent to be setting. Its quite scary that so many of you seem unable to see the real issue here
Evita Perón commented on Jul 26 11 at 12:25 amBlame Canada.
kgranju commented on Jul 26 11 at 12:33 amYes. It’s true. My 17 year old did not manage to maintain sobriety after completing his first stay in rehab and turning 18. Within 6 months of turning 18, he was dead.
He could not legally sign a contract.
He wasn’t old enough to order a beer at a restaurant.
He’d yet to get to cast his first vote.
He hadn’t yet started college, owned a car or even reached his full height.
He was a senior in high school, and his friends graduated the week he died of brain damage from drugs that two 40-something, actively drug-peddling adults urged him to take, telling him he could trust their expertise and knowledge.
My son was addicted to drugs. He was miserably unhappy with that fact, and the odds are pretty damn good that at 18 years and 6 months old, if he hadn’t been picked off by a couple of dangerous predators, he would have managed to find his way to recovery and sobreity with the love and support of all of us who adored him.
But so many of you seem to believe that drug dealers who knowingly decided to offer drugs to a barely legal teenager in the grip of a wickedly painful and difficult addiction – a teenager they knew full well was addicted and likely had other drugs in his system already – should not be subject to criminal penalties for the role they played in his death.
Henry is dead. He paid the ULTIMATE penalty for his drug addiction. I find it terribly sad that so many people seem okay with the idea of drug dealers getting a free pass in this situation, mainly because you seem to believe that even the youngest overdose victims have no one to blame but themselves.
-Katie
CY commented on Jul 26 11 at 12:36 amKatie, I respectfully disagree with you here. At what point do you expect someone to take responsibility for their own actions in cases like these? Amy Winehouse was a fully grown adult who was responsible for her own choices. It is illegal for her to take the drugs just as it is illegal for someone to sell them to her. Would you make the same argument about someone (over 21) who died as a result of intoxication? Would it be the bartender’s fault? And before anyone comes at me with a comment about me not being affected by addiction, let me say that both my brother and my father struggle with addiction. However, I never tried to place any blame on anyone but them. While I think drug dealers do prey on the weak, it is still those adult people who make the choice to embrace that lifestyle.
Kelly commented on Jul 26 11 at 1:50 amI’m sorry, but I have to agree with the majority of the commenters: the only one ultimately responsible for a drug user’s overdose is the drug user. Again, I’m sorry, but you can’t say with any certainty that your son, had he not met the people you blame for his death, would have kicked his habit. Hadn’t he been in in-patient rehab? And it still didn’t take? No one likes being an addict, but that’s why they call it addiction. I’ll say it again: I’m sorry, but personal responsibility has to enter into it. No one is rising to the defense of drug dealers, or “blaming the victim,” as your headline says. It just that most people (at least, it seems most people commenting here) believe that a person makes his/her own choices, and must bear responsibility for those choices.
Hola commented on Jul 26 11 at 2:13 amShe mentioned above she would think it is the bartender’s fault, and since bartender’s can be held legally liable, she won’t tolerate any discussion of the matter.
She doesn’t see that no one minds dealers being arrested. She wants people to say the drug dealers are the cause of overdose, not addiction itself. I don’t know why she wants to say this when no addict does.
It misdescribes the phenomenology of addiction. Addicts say they will get drugs “no matter what”, they don’t feel like the dealers duped them.
It seems like a straw man has been set up here- I just don’t see anyone saying “an addict deserves to die”. I see people pointing out that dealers are also addicts. I see people pointing to how shifting responsibility to dealers will encourage more drug use (the charge about enabling.)
It’d be more helpful if the good points (many made by people who live or lost addicts) were addressed directly. The article itself seems very confused.
c michael vance commented on Jul 26 11 at 7:04 amI Loved Amy she was a real renegade and a true artist, but I think you are wrong to lie the blame of her death on someone else, we all want to find someone to blame and punish to fill our need to do something, truth is she loved her drugs and she knew what the price was. you can not blame a car salesman because someone died in a car wreck. She is gone we will miss her but she will forever remain as a legend and music icon RIP little Amy….
MR T commented on Jul 26 11 at 7:45 amListen people who cares about winehouse anyway she was just another f*cked up pop star she was an addict and she had every means possible at her disposal to change her life and if she wasn’t famous we wouldnt care less people always want to look for someone or something else to blame in news stories like this, I get it its sad not for Amy but for her family there the ones who suffer from this.
But wait a minute people let’s take a look outside the winehouse bubble NORWAY ring any bells almost 90 innocent people killed now that’s something to feel sad about
Addiction is a sad thing but it always starts with that first act and decision to take drugs she made that decision and lived and died by it
harriet commented on Jul 26 11 at 8:13 amKatie–with all due respect, no one thinks that drug dealers should not be punished. But referring to your son’s “murder” and referring to his death as an “unsolved homicide” is disingenuous. Out of your own grief, you’re trying to place responsibility for his death onto other people.
C commented on Jul 26 11 at 8:24 amCy – 27 is a world away from 18. Even the choices of an 18 year old are far more immature than the choices of an 21 year old. That is why the drinking age was pushed up. Those few years may as well be a light year. Think back to when you were 18. Did you just shiver a little? Man, I did. I was dumb. And I would have looked at a 40 year old like he or she was a wise old sage.
Personally, I think the real crime here is that during Henrys obvious overdose, those same 40 year olds didn’t immediately get help. That is the crime. Its common knowledge that when someone is being deprived of oxygen, SECONDS count. Waiting even a minute can mean death.
Alexander commented on Jul 26 11 at 9:44 amThe bottom line here is – YES the law should be followed IF there is enough evidence to prosecute someone. I am not yet convinced that there is enough evidence to convict someone in Henry’s death. I am waiting for the article from Jamie to be released because that is as close as I’m likely to get to seeing the investigation file. From Katie’s blog – it appears certain that there is enough evidence – but what I don’t know is what the investigators themselves found out. I am waiting to hear more.
Anon commented on Jul 26 11 at 10:54 amCo-dependency seeks to dis-able the addict. By placing him in the role of the victim, you take away his power. You have put yourself into the role of Henry’s rescuer and you continually justifiy infantilizing him. If he was immature, it’s because he was treated as a child and a victim. I know plenty of 18 year olds who work, go to school, and are perfectly capable of taking care of themselves.
It’s interesting to me that the recovering addicts who have commented here would not blame the dealers. Maybe that’s why they’re recovering?
I know that you think you didn’t enable Henry, but you are STILL enabling Henry.
Can you see in your “Yes, it’s true…” post, above, how many times you dis-able Henry? Henry wasn’t a senior in high school. He dropped out. (Yes, I know he got his GED.) And, did he ‘trust the knowledge and expertise’ of the people who allegedly gave him the methadone? No. He went back and googled the dosage and was very well aware that he’d taken a dangerous amount. Did he choose to listen to his friends and seek help? No, he did not.
It’s very scary to me that you are willing to sacrifice yourself (your health, your peace of mind, your ability to be there for your other children who depend on you) because you think you must (perhaps indefinitely?) continue to fight for Henry. You have described, many times, situations where you put yourself into danger (going door to door in sketchy neighborhoods for example) which is extremely self-destructive behavior.
The reason people are prefacing their comments with “I swear I am not a troll” is because they have seen so many people attacked for disagreeing with you. I’ve seen many examples of what you call ‘cruel’ and ‘mean’ comments, and the people are actually trying to help you, if you would listen.
Michelle commented on Jul 26 11 at 12:07 pmKatie, if he wanted to be clean so badly, why wasn’t he? When he took that dose of methadone and realized it was a big dose, why didn’t he have his friends drive him to the hospital? Why didn’t he go to your house so you could get him help? I think that making the statement that he “was miserably unhappy with that fact, and the odds are pretty damn good that at 18 years and 6 months old, if he hadn’t been picked off by a couple of dangerous predators, he would have managed to find his way to recovery and sobriety” is a pretty big assumption given Henry’s history of refusing to stay in rehab and returning to using shortly after arriving home. Henry actively sought out drugs, it is not like he was sitting on a park bench all clean and sober when two people came along and forced drugs on him. The fact that the dealers were older does not change the fact that your son was 18, a legal adult, and was already an active drug addict. 18 year olds are legally able to sign contracts, serve in the military, die for their country, live on their own. They are not children. I know this is hard to accept. Nobody wants to have their child die. I can’t imagine how horrible it is. But you appear to be living in denial of Henry’s personal choice to live the life of a drug addict. He had other options where many addicts don’t. He had a family that loved him and sent him to rehab for almost a year. He knew you would help him get off drugs. But he chose not to do that and instead chose to sell drugs and continue living the lifestyle.
And Amy Winehouse had even more options than Henry did and wasted her life on drugs. It’s hard to feel sorry for someone who had so much and crapped it all away.
wendi commented on Jul 26 11 at 12:16 pm“Yes. It’s true. My 17 year old did not manage to maintain sobriety after completing his first stay in rehab and turning 18. Within 6 months of turning 18, he was dead.”
I’m truly very sorry for your loss. Some responders will no doubt call me heartless and a troll, but please believe that I wish for your family and for Henry that he had been able to recover and lead the very wonderful life that he was meant to live. That said…
“He could not legally sign a contract.”
How is this relevant? Did someone make him sign a contract to buy drugs?
“He wasn’t old enough to order a beer at a restaurant.”
How is this relevant?
“He’d yet to get to cast his first vote.”
How is this relevant?
“He hadn’t yet started college, owned a car or even reached his full height.”
Again, relevant? None of that is relevent except that you continuoulsy use those statements to paint a picture of Henry that doesn’t tell the whole story. He couldn’t vote, but he could buy and sell drugs.
“He was a senior in high school, and his friends graduated the week he died of brain damage from drugs that two 40-something, actively drug-peddling adults urged him to take, telling him he could trust their expertise and knowledge.”
Urged him, but didn’t force him? People are urged all the time to do things. They rely on their better judgment to know whether they should do whatever it is they’re being urged to do. He also seemed to know, at least after the fact, that he had taken a dose that could be dangerous. His friends also knew. According to you, they all looked it up on the internet together. Yet he did not seek medical help, and no one sought medical help for him. According to witness statements that you yourself have provided, he was in a stupor-like condition and still his friends let him leave with strangers. Why is there no outcry from you regarding the actions, or more specifically, inactions of his friends who failed to call you and failed to call for medical care for Henry when it was needed? Because you need to stay on their good side until your suit against Y & R is dismissed? (NO, I am NOT defending Y & R. I am just wondering why you pick and choose who to blame.)
“My son was addicted to drugs. He was miserably unhappy with that fact, and the odds are pretty damn good that at 18 years and 6 months old, if he hadn’t been picked off by a couple of dangerous predators, he would have managed to find his way to recovery and sobreity with the love and support of all of us who adored him.”
“But so many of you seem to believe that drug dealers who knowingly decided to offer drugs to a barely legal teenager in the grip of a wickedly painful and difficult addiction – a teenager they knew full well was addicted and likely had other drugs in his system already – should not be subject to criminal penalties for the role they played in his death.”
Please don’t forget to mention that this “barely legal teenager” (What does that even mean? A person is either of legal age or not. That’s like saying someone is a little bit pregnant), knowingly decided to ingest drugs and had done so for years and years prior to the incident that ultimately took his life. If he had not decided to take illegal drugs long before he even met these dangerous predators, he would not have been “in the grip of a wickedly painful and difficult addiction” that you claim they preyed upon. Further, your “barely legal teenager” was robbed and beaten during a drug deal wherein he was the drug dealer. I realize you’ve said in the past that you wish Henry had been arrested for his dealing, but I don’t believe you mean that you wish Henry had been punished for the crimes he committed. It seems that you wish he had been incarcerated so that he would have an opportunity to kick his drug habit while locked up. Can’t blame you there… you’re a mother. That makes perfect sense to me.
“Henry is dead. He paid the ULTIMATE penalty for his drug addiction. I find it terribly sad that so many people seem okay with the idea of drug dealers getting a free pass in this situation, mainly because you seem to believe that even the youngest overdose victims have no one to blame but themselves.”
I don’t think anyone is saying, and at the very least I am not saying, that drug dealers should be given a free pass. However, look at the title of your post… you seem to want to place all of the blame on the dealers and assign absolutely none of it on those who choose… yes, CHOOSE to buy and take the drugs in the first place. While drug dealers should not be given a free pass, the drug takers (and yes, every drug taker is someone’s child who was loved and cherished) have to burden the responsibility for their choices. No drug dealer ever killed someone who didn’t take drugs in the first place.
Cath Young commented on Jul 26 11 at 12:55 pmThe laws ARE there to go after the drug dealers BUT ONLY IF the evidence is there just as it is with any criminal case in this country. The authorities go after doctors who irresponsibly prescribe drugs when they get the evidence. Drug dealers are considered the scourge of the earth in terms of prosecution. But there has to be sufficient proof to book them, prosecute them and convict them. When the proof is there, the authorities are more than happy go after the dealers. The laws are such that going after the users really amounts to a slap on their wrist and often hardly worth pursuing. It’s the dealers that can get the long sentences and felony convictions.
If anything, there is not enough legal consequence for the users. A stint in jail and mandatory rehab is often what some of the users desperately need. The families can’t do anything with these young adults once they turn 18. But what usually happens is that using illegal drugs does not amount to much in the way of jail time. I think in Henry’s case, the family felt jail was the best alternative for him. When he was put in jail, he was out in a day or so. Here in our area, if you are caught with a personal use amount of pot, it’s just a fine, tantamount to a traffic ticket. And if it is in your body, unless you are driving, they won’t even go after you for it.
Henry spent a good deal of time loaded up in drugs, it seems, illegal ones, and yet he was allowed to go walking around with no legal consequences, and his friends and family could do nothing about it either. So, the victims do need to be legally responsible for using drugs, and the authorities need to be more proactive in going after those using illegal drugs.
Lo commented on Jul 26 11 at 1:04 pmHarriet, your argument is flawed. Drug induced homicide is a crime in where Katie lives. Tennessee’s Second Degree Murder Statute includes section a2, defining Second Degree Murder as, “A killing of another that results from the unlawful distribution of any Schedule I or Schedule II drug, when the drug is the proximate cause of the death of the user.” (http://law.justia.com/codes/tennessee/2010/title-39/chapter-13/part-2/39-13-210/)
She’s not being disingenuous, she’s got herself a rock solid legal point. Just because you disagree with the law, doesn’t make it any less of a law.
Alexander commented on Jul 26 11 at 1:15 pmI think there are two issues here – one is criminal responsibility according to the law and one is personal responsibility.
Do I think addicts have some personal responsibility for their actions? Yes
Do I think criminal responsibility belongs to the dealer according to the law and without regard to the victim’s station in life? YesI think it is possible to feel that Amy or Henry were responsible for their choices while still feeling that if the evidence is there – the law should be followed.
Jane Doe commented on Jul 26 11 at 1:43 pmThanks for saying what I was thinking Michelle. I’ll go further: I see classic enabling and codependency in Katie’s writing. The fact that these two folks failed to call for help is a prosecutable crime. Sadly this one aspect allows Katie to continue in her denial of the much bigger picture
Hola commented on Jul 26 11 at 1:46 pmJane Doe, only it is even worse. The police report that was released includes phone records and testimony that seem to show that the woman being accused to homicide was begging to find out what drugs the man took, called his father and got no answer, tried to revive him, and called 911. All within a short period of time. I’ve been around the block, and that is some drug dealer. I’ve never dreamed one would try to help save my loved ones life after an overdose.
tralala commented on Jul 26 11 at 2:54 pmKatie, I believe your son’s youth influences your understanding of drug addiction. There are thousands (millions?) of drug addicts who attend rehab, go to jail (which often doesn’t help since they can usually get drugs in there), and continue using drugs. Many OD repeatedly. And continue using drugs. Some have loving families trying to help them. They continue using drugs.
They are ultimately responsible for their own behavior. No one is forcing them to want the drugs, to buy the drugs, to use the drugs.Drug users are often drug dealers. You have admitted Henry dealt drugs in exchange for drugs. There is no fine line between dealer/user.
What we need is intensive reform of drug policy and more, cheaper rehabs.
Please note I am not talking about the specific circumstances of your sons death, just drug users in general.
Elissa commented on Jul 26 11 at 3:59 pmA drug addict is not any more murdered by their dealer than a suicide victim is by their mental illness. Both addiction and mental illness are treatable conditions, addiction however is completely preventable. I feel sorry for the people left behind by the selfish actions of an addict. Yes, selfish. They chose to take drugs the first time and I hold them fully responsible. I come from a family of addicts of varying degree and varying substances. I’ve lost patience with the belief that they aren’t to blame for their addiction when no one but them used the drugs. No one but them chased down the dealer and met to get their drugs. It takes two and they are fully to blame.
Sitting on the porch commented on Jul 26 11 at 4:08 pm“We should not have a system of laws in which law enforcement and prosecutors apply personal bias and discretion in deciding which laws will be upheld and which ones won’t.”.
You are absolutely right! The law of the land should be adhered to in regard to illegal immigration, as well. The law is the law. Period. Don’t like the law? Then do something to change it. Until then we need to enforce the laws that we have.
Nina commented on Jul 26 11 at 5:45 pmSo many of these comments are so harsh. I don’t understand the anger behind them…
I think Katie understands that her son was an addict who was not ready for recovery (yet). And she loves him and misses him, and grieves for the 18 year old — a young man who should have been in high school — who had potential to be so much more than an addict. I think she knows he made terrible mistakes, terrible choices, but I feel some people are asking her to somehow say that it was all his fault.
But it wasn’t all his fault. He made bad choices, yes. But there were people twice his age who supplied him with drugs. There were people who took him to their home when he was obviously in trouble. There were people who didn’t call for help in time to save his life.
And on top of this, there was an investigation lead by officials who dismissed her and her son time and time again, telling her to shut up, for goodness sake! The authorities — who’s job it is to protect the citizens who pay their salary — didn’t and don’t seem interested in understanding what really happened or in communicating with her in even the most basic, civil way. It is easier for them — and some commenters as well — to write Henry off as a worthless addict who got what was coming to him.
Yes, Katie wants someone to be held accountable for the part they played in her son’s death. She wants them not to be able to do it again to someone else’s child. Why is that wrong?
an addict commented on Jul 26 11 at 6:12 pmi wish you well in grieving your child in whatever way you need to, and would respectfully suggest that attending an al-anon meeting might be a beneficial thing for you, or even for your whole family.
kgranju commented on Jul 26 11 at 9:09 pmAnon -
My son did not drop out of high school. That is patently false. He was a junior in high school when we sent him to a well-regarded, accredited therapeutic boarding school to get the addiction treatment he needed. He was enrolled in school during his time in treatment, and he made the decision to study for and obtain his GED in November, within 8 weeks of returning home rather than re-enrolling in his previous high school and waiting to graduate in May. He earned a high score, was proud of this achievement, and his father and I remain proud of it. He planned to start college in the fall of 2010, with his classmates.
There are obviously many other points you’ve made with which I disagree, but I wanted to correct your factual error.
Respectfully – Katie
kgranju commented on Jul 26 11 at 9:11 pmDear An Addict: I regularly attend Al-Anon and highly recommend it. Other close family members are also actively engaged in the program. Thank you – Katie
Anon commented on Jul 26 11 at 10:22 pmA serious question — what is the difference between leaving one high school and not enrolling (or reenrolling in another) and dropping out of high school? Is it the term “dropping out” that is offensive? Would “choosing not to continue high school” be appropriate and acceptable?
Lauren commented on Jul 26 11 at 11:58 pmRegarding the uneven application of law by prosecutors:
Prosecutors do have a great deal of discretion in the cases they choose to prosecute. That is why they are elected–so that the prosecutor reflects the cultural norms of the community they represent. For example, plenty of outdated laws are still on the books in places, but no one is charged with those crimes because those laws do not mesh with contemporary cultural norms.
In this case, the only way to change the application of law is to change the prosecutors via election. Thus, the change in the cultural conversation that Katie mentions.
Also, I noticed many comments taking issue with the title of this post. I thought I read/heard somewhere that Babble contributors do not write their own titles. Instead, the titles are written by others (who have an interest in driving traffic with controversial headlines). If that is true, then it becomes clear that Katie’s nuanced point about blame (that some should be attributed to dealers) is muddied by a distorted headline.
Terri C commented on Jul 27 11 at 12:52 amKatie wrote,
“My son was addicted to drugs. He was miserably unhappy with that fact, and the odds are pretty damn good that at 18 years and 6 months old, if he hadn’t been picked off by a couple of dangerous predators, he would have managed to find his way to recovery and sobreity with the love and support of all of us who adored him.”
Katie, where do you find these odds? Like others who have commented here, I don’t find your son’s situations and behavior to have been particularly hopeful. Rather than taking action to get off drugs, Henry does seem to have been plummeting deeper and deeper into addiction. I think this is the piece of the story where things get muddled–you seem, to many of us who have loved persons with addiction, to be at an emotional level extremely dismissive of the danger Henry was in from his addictive disease, and to have discounted the terrible prognostic indicator that was his refusal to engage in treatment. You’ve focused on the role of “dealers” and until two days ago I never knew that Henry had stolen prescription medications from a family member while on a trip that, he told you, was “to get away from drugs.”
I don’t think his odds were very good to be honest. But then I work in health care and see a lot of deaths from addiction…
katie allison granju commented on Jul 27 11 at 1:21 amTerry C. – Although I’ve yet to review the case file released last week, the story that I am told exists within it about Henry “stealing drugs” from my Uncle John is, if reported that way, completely misleading.
Your suggestion that I am in some way minimizing or refusing to face the seriousness or specifics of my son’s drug addiction is, in my opinion, totally unfair. Our family has been as open as we can be, and as painfully, graphically honest as we can be about Henry’s drug use, abuse and addiction. We’ve been as open as we have because we want to help other families and other addicts. I believe that our openness in discussing the difficult details of how addiction impacted our child and our family has been somewhat unprecedented. But the idea that an 18 year old struggling mightily with an addiction, primarily to opiates is basically a lost cause is deeply troubling to me, and belies the hopeful stories that so many recovering addicts can share. Perhaps my belief that Henry’s odds of finding his way to sobriety had he not died at age 18 is misguided and wrongheaded. On the other hand, perhaps your suggestion that this was not a likely outcome is too pessimistic. We’ll never know, though, because my son is dead.
Hola commented on Jul 27 11 at 1:50 amI looked around to see if I could find an article on how controversial it is to call addiction as disease, and I’ve found this. I’d still recommend the book I mentioned (“What is Addiction?” MIT Press) and its many sources as the very best way to get caught up on research in addiction.
But this short article explains why some worry that the public might take “addiction as disease” to mean more than “malady” or “afflicition”. Addiction changes structures of the brain- but so does everything. In the case of addiction if we call these changes a “disease” what do we really mean? It is not yet clear, as in researchers do not yet agree. So we are spreading misinformation if we act like “oh addiction is a disease, that explains everything.” It really explains nothing. Here’s a guide to the many available options for how to think about addiction, based on the most recent science: http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1360-0443.2010.03158.x/full
Debra commented on Jul 27 11 at 4:11 amYes, victims of domestic violence do get blamed for their injuries/murders!!! Why do you think there is such a stigma attached to domestic violence! (or maybe you didn’t know there is a stigma.) I hide my bruises (physical and mental for quite some time.) Frequently the victim is blamed when the real question that ought to be asked is NOT “why didn’t you leave.” More people need to be asking why does/did he (or she) beat/kill? Unlike drug addiction, wherein the addict’s brain is demanding more drugs and withdraw from said drug is very unpleasant and possibly life threatening, a victim of domestic abuse returns to the violent home for many reasons ~ not necessarily because she is compelled to do so because her brain/body is craving more of the same.
Molly commented on Jul 27 11 at 5:19 amReading these comments has made it clear that something needs to change if we want to stop the drug epidemic that is rampant in our community. People can preach about personal responsibility all they want but clearly this approach is not helping with the larger issue. Instead of arguing whether Henry was a high school senior or a dropout, I’d like to hear from people who are opposed to holding dealers responsible for overdose deaths what they think should be done to the drug problem. And being respectful never hurts!
S.M. Carrière commented on Jul 27 11 at 10:21 amThis was a very thoughtful, well articulated article. I agree that dealer ought to be held criminally liable for the deaths of those they deal to. Pure and simple.
Mare in ATL commented on Jul 27 11 at 4:34 pmMy take on it all………
We never know before taking the first drink, smoke or toke- how it will affect our lives. Many try something once and walk away, many never have another day of peace from addiction. The lucky ones among us never understand how powerful that drive can be.Laws have been changed to hold bartenders responsible for drunk drivers on the road. That is very much the same as holding a drug dealer (breaking the law in the first place) responsible for the death of someone using drugs.
Think for a moment- if a dealer laces a drug & someone dies, we prosecute that act.The user was still breaking the law. Tobacco companies have been held liable for deaths,even when smokers know the risk.
We don’t have protection for assisted suicide, so even the argument that addicts want to die ( I don’t buy it ) does not excuse helping them along.We need to admit addiction managment, drug law enforcment, social censure and have not solved the issues of drug abuse and the terrible toll on addicts, the families and our communities. Addicts still have to do the daily WORK of not using. But making it unacceptable for the dealers to peddle their wares and the comics to poke fun would be a great start.
.
heidi commented on Jul 27 11 at 5:09 pmHolding someone accountable for there choices in life isn’t mean. It is actually quit helpful in the development of a individual. Many parents start teaching self responsibility to their children as toddlers. With practice it starts to become a way of life. In the long run we would have fewer addicts, dealers, and more hard working open minded professionals, if all took personal responsibility for their actions and how they effect both themselves and those around them.
It is OK to get as mad as hell at those who make poor choices. We can still envelop our loved ones with unconditional love while acknowledging that they are not living up to age appropriate, society driven expectations. That would be good for all involved. So many people involved with this heartbreaking story have made some costly mistakes. If we want to hold the dealers and the law enforcers to the highest standards, we must also be willing to hold those we love most to those same standards. It’s not mean, it’s good, and it could save a life.
harriet commented on Jul 27 11 at 6:25 pmIf Henry, who was dealing drugs himself, sold a pill to someone who overdosed and died, would Katie be fine with him being prosecuted for murder?
Katie Allison Granju commented on Jul 27 11 at 6:34 pmHarriet
I would never be – “fine” with my son being charged and put behind bars for murder, just as I am not “fine” with the fact that he was trading and selling pills to support his habit or “fine” with the fact that he was terribly sick with drug addiction or “fine” with the fact that he’s dead.However, if your question is whether I would understand the responsibility for law enforcement to do their jobs in the event that my son had killed someone as a result of committing a felony (illegal distribution of drugs), the answer is an unequivocal yes. I have stated this specific thing repeatedly and publicly.
Also, just to be clear with anyone who wonders, I tried multiple times to get Henry arrested in the last few months of his life, and also in the months leading up to us sending him to inpatient rehabilitation when he was 17. Whatever may be the case in other communities, I can tell you with certainty that getting a young family member who is involved with drugs arrested is not easy to do in Knoxville, TN. I know, because I tried every way I could figure out to do it with no success.
-Katie
David commented on Jul 27 11 at 7:47 pm@ Terri C “Here’s a guide to the many available options for how to think about addiction, based on the most recent science: http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1360-0443.2010.03158.x/full”
This is an excellent source, and I highly recommend it to everyone interested in this thread. Its a complicated conversation.
The core question here, however, isn’t to solve the mysteries of addiction. It is whether or not Katie’s calls for further reliance on law enforcement solutions to overdose are the right policy. I argue strongly that they are not. Our current criminalization adds cost and harm to a very serious public health issue.
When users and dealers know that calling for help is a call to arrest themselves, they will not call. More people will die like Henry. We will save more lives (addicts and those who love them) by offering treatment than we do with arrests.
Lia commented on Jul 27 11 at 11:33 pmI spent over an hour today reading the medical and police records Katie’s posted on her site, and my mind is unchanged. There are no grounds for a homicide charge, and I fail to even see the possibility of second degree murder.
The medical records show no indication of the fractured skull Katie has mentioned many times. They ALSO indicate he received appropriate care, but sadly died from complications related to the overdose he took.
Note that I said “he took”. No one forced the drugs on him. No one coerced him. He was the responsible party. Him. Henry.
Katie, you have the podium to make some real changes, and pursuing an impossible battle to prosecute dealers for murder isn’t the right change. Instead, why not push for fully funded rehab? Making prescription meds much harder to obtain? Personal responsibility?
I am a mother myself, and I could envision my child going down this path, but if he does, the blame would be his.
Terri C commented on Jul 28 11 at 12:22 amDavid, with all respect, I think both are core questions. I think people who do not understand addiction–not in the academic sense, but in the behavioral sense, the information that tells us what persons with addiction do when actively using, have trouble also understanding the complexity of options for dealing with it. I may not think that the criminal solutions are best, but decriminalization will most certainly not stop overdose. That’s because addictive substances are inherently dangerous, and people using them in increasing amounts to get high are at increasing risk. People OD *all the time* in the comforts of their own homes on substances they have obtained legally. Also, offering treatment only helps people who want treatment. Henry, and many others, do not want treatment. One useful question might be: why do some people with addiction NOT want treatment, assuming treatment is available?
Jenny commented on Jul 28 11 at 1:23 amI also think that while, yes, it is a disease, you can get clean if you really want to and you have the support. I was a cocaine addict for 3 years. I’ve been clean now for almost 7 years with no relapses. I did not have the money for rehab and I had almost no support, but I was still able to get clean. Was it easy? Hell no. It was painful, lonely and extremely hard, but I still managed to do it. Yes, part of the blame should go to drug dealers and such because addiction is a disease and a lot of them prey on people with that disease, but it’s also the addicts fault. AW had so many opportunities to get clean by going to rehab and had people who wanted to support her and she basically spit in their face when they offered their help. Hell, she even wrote a song about it. That is her fault. It’s very sad and unfortunate, and my heart goes out to her family and friends, but I personally feel like she got herself into this situation.
MrsHuber commented on Jul 31 11 at 6:15 amI feel different on this situation. For one, Amy wasn’t a victim of anything. I am a recovering addict that made the decision on my own to get clean and sober. I didn’t need rehab, I was in a 12 step program for years by choice, because my addiction was taking away my quality of life and I wanted to learn to live not die. I learned healthier ways to cope with my traumatic past. The addict has to take responsibility for their actions. Nobody chooses to become an addict, but you do choose to take the drugs or alcohol that puts you on that path. You cannot in any way help an addict unless they are willing to help themselves. You are wasting your time if they refuse help. Amy, being a celebrity, knew of all the ways she can get help out there, but didnt want it bad enough, because she continued her addiction until the effects killed her. During several years in the 12 step program, I have watched many addicts die, some I was close to. This is a fatal disease, most addicts that are that deep in addiction dont care about themselves or others, and they choose the drug over their families, lives, jobs, etc and romance the drug until they end up in jail or institutions if lucky, or death. They are only a shell of who they once were. The only “victims” in an addicts death are the family and friends left behind, searching for answers and many blaming themselves for “not helping the person.” Yes, drug dealers need to take responsibility, but the addict made the choice each time to call or visit their dealer. Nobody forced them to go buy the drugs and take them. Most addicts are so desperate for that next hit, or drink, etc, that they steal from those who love them most. So speaking as a former addict, I refuse to ever consider an addict a victim.
Morgan commented on Aug 10 11 at 9:54 pmThe only people who can end addictive behavior are the addicts themselves. My sister was diagnosed as an alcoholic and was addicted to numerous drugs. Rehab and interventions did nothing. Then she decided she was done hurting herself and just stopped.
The people who gave her drugs were enablers in an accidental suicide. That’s all.
kgranju commented on Aug 15 11 at 12:10 pmLia – I believe you are mistaken on every point. I am comfortable that my advocacy for my son’s case is appropriate and justified, and I intend to keep at it until justice is served. -Katie
kgranju commented on Aug 15 11 at 12:13 pmAnon – Transferring high schools is not “dropping out” in any terminology I’ve ever heard. And in fact, my son graduated high school six months early, actually. His classmates received their Tennessee accredited high school diplomas in May of 2010, while he earned his in November of 2009. – Katie
11235813213455 commented on Aug 15 11 at 11:18 pmCrying because an adult you never met who had money, fame, talent and a million second chances overdosed? Grow up.
Alan commented on Aug 22 11 at 12:19 pmIt does not matter who we choose to blame. People die every minute. Some die in bed with loved ones by their side, many do not. Putting people in prisons is good for prison owners, not human beings. Pretending we know who to hate may make us feel righteous, but, never helps anyone, ever. Without compassion, we are all cheap late night comedians. Addiction needs no punch line. Do you?
RH commented on Aug 22 11 at 1:43 pmLast time I checked drug dealers didn’t have to go knocking down people’s doors to sell them product, so the statement about “targeting” addicts seems silly to me. I don’t have any hard data to back this up, but based on my own personal experiences once the user decides they like a drug, they are the ones that seek out the dealers time and time again.
Any life lost to addiction is sad and a terrible waste. I see it as a senseless tragedy no matter if the addict has had multiple chances at rehabilitation, or none at all. Why does blame have to come into the equation?
To the blog writer I am sorry that you had to go through something so terrible. But as other people have pointed out, if you call the drug dealer the murderer you also have to put that label on people that sell liquor and cigarettes too, which seems extreme. Yes, the drug dealers broke the law by selling drugs. But then wouldn’t the addict be just as guilty for purchasing them?
Lets put some responsibility on the people that choose to purchase these poisons for themselves.
ashley commented on Sep 05 11 at 10:27 pmI was interested by the headline, so I opened this to read it. Unfortunately, I couldn’t finish reading it once it was suggested that drug dealers be held criminally liable for the fatal overdoses that occur from the products they sell. To me, that’s no different than suggesting anywhere with a liquor license should be liable for the actions of the people who buy alcohol. People have free will. Yes, it may be compromised by addiction, but in most cases, there is no one forcing someone else to take a drug. Legal or illegal drug.
Jayceekay commented on Sep 14 11 at 8:25 pmI stumbled upon this site through an ad for ‘Babble’. Obviously I don’t know you and I’m very sorry about your son, and I understand your feelings, but…. I felt compelled to write because I’m just so amazed at your thinking. I so completely don’t understand. I firmly believe an addict is an addict because he doesn’t stop himself. Period. Be it drugs, liquor, food, smoking…stop if it is negatively affecting you.
A drug dealer is responsible for his own butt and no one else’s, in my opinion. YOU are responsible for you. God, doesn’t anyone take responsibility for anything anymore? Sure he should be arrested…for selling illegal drugs. A drug dealer could come to my door and pay me to take drugs and I would send him on his way. Now a girl scout trying to sell me cookies? Dunkin’ Donuts commercials over and over? That would be a crime to me since food is MY unhealthy addiction….since childhood. My sister is a raging alcoholic and makes my life and anyone who cares about hers, a misery. She has wrecked her life. SHE has. In my opinion, she doesn’t have a disease, she needs to stop drinking. My best friend fought cancer with every single solitary molecule she possessed–death took her kicking and screaming– for 2 years she fought and lost. SHE had a disease. My sister just needs to STOP DRINKING. My brother was a diabetic for his whole life and he died because he had low blood sugar while on his motorcycle and he went into the fuge state that happens then and he crashed and died. And I don’t mean to sound cold because that nearly did me in, nearly killed me to lose him, BUT…. I know him and he HAD to know how he was feeling–they were headed to get food because of this. But he should have had a sugar cube in his pocket like when we were kids. Now they sell glycerine tablets even. Hell, a handful of jellybeans would have saved his life. In my opinion, it is HIS fault that he died. He wished to be ‘normal’ but he wasn’t and it was HIS responsibility to take care of that. See how that works? No one can or can’t make you do something. Only you can. And lest you think I don’t live as I speak, I finally took responsiblity at 45 and I lost 125 lbs. People coax me with cake all the time, “oh just this once won’t hurt, you know you want it.” sometimes I do, sometimes I don’t, but it is MY fault when I give in not theirs.
I’m sorry to go on, but your opinion hit a nerve in my soul. I’m truly sorry for your loss and I get where it comes from, but I so disagree and felt the need to state my opinion.
(Earlier in the comments someone wrote, ” If you don’t like this article, you should read another one. The internet is pretty big.”. Well this is a blog and blogs are posted to send out your opinion and hear about others. That is a blog’s nature. When one blogss an opinion, one gets opinions back. It is unfair to imply that only people with agreeing opinions should read or post and all others should leave and read something else. A blog that no one reads is simply a private journal.)
Derek commented on Sep 30 11 at 12:05 amYour lack of intelligent reasoning is sickening. Like any grieving loved one who simply can’t rest the blame where it truly lies, Your emotions have caused irrational thinking to get the best of you. This type of “recovery industry” propaganda negates all personal responsibility on the part of a drug user; licit or illicit. Compulsive drug use is not involuntary. If the fact that there is an underlying pathology connected with the continuous use of drugs can be manipulated to serve as evidence that compulsive drug use is a disease, then we could say the same about romantic infatuation or sexual relations. The neuroadaptation which causes the ‘desire’ for drugs does not negate the rational mind or the ability to choose. Drugs (licit or illicit) in not inherently good or inherently evil. They are not capable of acting on individuals against their own will. Our country was founded on the principle of individual liberty, and personal responsibility; and the fact that a personal choice is criminalized does not make it wrong. Drugs are a commodity just like anything else, and those who capitalize on this massive demand should not be persecuted, much less blamed for the recklessness or incompetence of the consumer.
Valerie commented on Oct 02 11 at 10:59 pmGet real, you are in denial. It’s like saying someone holds a gun against your head forcing you to not exercise and to overeat so, heck, not your fault if you are overwejght.Tell someone else your sad story, everybody has one of those…
Trixie commented on Oct 12 11 at 6:52 pmI have been on both sides of this fence as first a drug dealer and then a drug addict. Your perception of reality is very delusional and I hope you will find the courage to open your mind to other avenues of blame. I want to say I am sorry for your loss and that In one aspect you are totally correct about those who deal drugs. If they are preying on children (under 18) then I totally agree that they should be punished to the full extent of the law. When I sold, I didn’t have to prey on ANYONE! I was sought out like a rare commodity. I had to move to get away from addicts who wanted more, more, more! I also sold a clean product that wasn’t enriched with synthetics or chemical additives, baby powder, baby laxatives, bath salts or anything else. So if I told someone “no” and they went elsewhere, I actually worried that they would get a bad product. They were going to go wherever they could to get their fix whether I’m the one that provided it or someone else did. Drug dealers don’t have to prey on anyone and once they are hooked, any dealer will do.
I had sold for over 5 years before becoming addicted myself. Once I did I understood how an addicts mind works. I had a $1,000 a day crack cocaine habit that was insatiable for 20 years and only by the grace of God am I still here to tell about it. I would purchase from anyone I could find and it was common knowledge among other addicts that if I were to die in there home of an overdose that they should put me in the nearest dumpster. You may think that sounds cruel but that kept everyone from being charged criminally in the result of MY OWN ACTIONS!! The drug dealer wouldn’t have been the one responsible for what I chose to do and should be accountable for my decisions to use.
You may think that without a dealer, drugs are impossible to obtain but that isn’t the truth. Many items are currently sold in your local convenient store labeled as “not for human consumption” They are sold as “Pot Pourri” which is fake weed and “Bath Salts” which are being used to snort, cook and smoke as crack cocaine. People are using these items that are clearly marked with dangerous warning if consumed to get high. Since they are considered drugs, they are not controlled by the FDA or DEA and obtainable by anyone of any age. Do you then hold the retailer responsible if your child dies from misuse of their product? What if your child dies from huffing gas? Who is responsible then?
Please adjust views to merit the real victim’s situation. You are the victim here. You didn’t choose to have an addicted loved one. All you can do is love them as much as you can and try to help them in any possible and when all else fails and they fall victim to themselves your grief and dispair must end at some time and allow you to move forward.
I speak from experience and know what I am talking about. I was a dealer, I was an addict, I am my own person with my own thoughts and I am in recovery now but I had to come to a point in my life where the drugs didn’t work for me any more and I had to value other things in order to recover. And by the way, just because a person relapses, does not mean they don’t want to get better. It happens in baby steps. They need to be able to get back up and try again. It’s not a futile efffort, but it is a lifelong battle. I wish you the best and hope what I’ve written will help those who cannot forgive the wrong people and put the blame where it lies, and then be able to forgive your addict for what they chose to do. What they did was never personal.
Virginia commented on Jan 04 12 at 7:24 pmBy this standard all bars/liquor stores/alcohol manufacturers should be shut down, all prescription pain relievers should be pulled off the market and Dr.s that prescribe them and the makers of those drugs should be in jail along with the bartenders and shop keepers that distribute alcohol…..or is it only illegal drugs that matter in this issue, because I know far more alcoholics and people addicted to legally prescribed pain killers (that are even paid for by their insurance company) than I do people whom are addicted to illegal drugs. I understand no one wants to blame a victim but where do we draw the line? When do we say “You are an adult and have to take some responsibility for your decisions and actions.”?. What about someone who is addicted to food and eats themselves to death, do we lock up the owner of the McDonald’s that sold them their Big Macs? A food addiction is just as real as a drug addiction, it IS their drug….do we ban sugar and salt and fat and red meat to protect the minority from themselves?
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supermommy commented on Feb 24 12 at 12:40 pmOk, so we blame the dealer not the user. Put the drug dealer in jail (where they belong) and the addict will find another and another right on down the road until they get what they want. It is the force of addiction and no one will ever be satisfied.
The drunk driver that kills someone goes to jail, right? As it should be since the victim did not choose to be a victim. But what about the liquor vendor, the bar tender the waitress; do they have to share the blame for the drivers choice? Aren’t they the ones who supplied the alcohol that fueled the poor choice? I don’t think so, they have no way of knowing the drunks intent.
A few years ago in my neighborhood, a woman was struck and killed by a drunk driver. He was on his way home from the local pub and drove the 6 or 8 blocks, rather than walk or cab, and killed a woman in the process. The bar tender was blamed for over serving. Why? He didn’t put the drunk behind the wheel. The drunk cried foul when his house arrest restrictions prevented him from being present at his kids soccer games and some bleeding heart judge relaxed it for him. Where’s the justice for the victim and her family? She never gets to see another soccer game or attend graduation or weddings.Get your head out of the sand and see it for what it is. It was a bad choice fueled by a series of bad choices with no do overs. Yes, the dealers should be in jail, but they shouldn’t have to shoulder all of the blame for everyone’s bad choices; they are already dealing with their own.
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